My life has gone to shit

[ihatefoids65]

I have some form of phsycosis, I haven’t felt real for years I’m slow and I can remember anything and my brain is completely fucked. I’ve had derealisation constantly since over a a year ago because I was laced with spice or something. I remember a couple years ago a swore,to myself that I would never take a single drug in honour of my uncle who passed away from a drug overdose. Look how that ended up. I can’t imagine how my disappointed he would be, let alone my father who lost his older brother to it. I’ve been trying to quit drugs since I was laced but I just don’t have the self control or discipline to stop. My head was already somewhat messed up from my childhood but all this has just put the nail in the coffin. I feel like my life is just slowly slipping away out of my hands and it feels horrible. I have delusions that I don’t even know are real or not for example I go through periods of beliving nothing is real. Whenever I come across a coinsindcence it sends me into a spiral of schizo like thoughts. I’m genuinely the black sheep of my entire bloodline and it doesn’t help the fact that I am unlovable due to my looks and that I am nd. I have frequent panic attacks and I don’t know what’s real anymore, if anything is real for that matter. I am such a dissapointment to my entire family and my life should have been given to someone better than me.

 

[tension]

Dnr

 

[ihatefoids65]

Dnr

Kill yourself.

 

[ihatefoids65]

Let alone my grades are shit

 

[DownwardGrowthCel]

your rep to post is 0.36. i aint reading shit. officially my first dnr of the day

 

[svarddre]

I’ve dealt with derealization a ton in the past. It gets better bruh you just gotta push through it

Dm me if you want I know how hellish that can be

 

[svarddre]

your rep to post is 0.36. i aint reading shit. officially my first dnr of the day

Money spent on an incel forum

First on my ignored list

 

[DownwardGrowthCel]

Money spent on an incel forum

First on my ignored list

got that shit gifted to me

 

[irrumator praetor]

your rep to post is 0.36. i aint reading shit. officially my first dnr of the day

clocking into a j*b
clocking in the first dnr of the day on .org

 

[irrumator praetor]

Anyway I would presume: family history of drug addiction = lower income background, less education (on average)

Cannot deal with psychosis = insufficient protein, cholesterol and fat intake for proper brain function. Otherwise would resolve with time and thinking

Compounding bad thoughts and family shame = overall bad childhood

Im no doctor but eat more eggs and think about things more while trying to improve your life. Can't give you any other advice

 

[ihatefoids65]

Anyway I would presume: family history of drug addiction = lower income background, less education (on average)

Cannot deal with psychosis = insufficient protein, cholesterol and fat intake for proper brain function. Otherwise would resolve with time and thinking

Compounding bad thoughts and family shame = overall bad childhood

Im no doctor but eat more eggs and think about things more while trying to improve your life. Can't give you any other advice

Thanks for help