ElySioNs
Mercenary
- Joined
- Feb 7, 2021
- Posts
- 1,660
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I was at my mom's side as she passed a few days ago and have been shattered since. She won't be there at home when I go visit anymore, she won't come visit, and she won't get to keep being a gramma.
I thought I could depend on my wife to be there for me emotionally. I thought she would hold me as I cried, and that I could be safe with her and just let go. Yesterday I was home and was looking through a bunch of stuff in the house when I found some pretty damning evidence of cheating that my wife thought she had hidden. I confronted her with it and she denied and denied and finally admitted to having been sleeping around and also in a longer term affair.
She says she wants to make it work, that I'm her long term and her everything and we are supposed to grow old together. I don't even know how I feel at this point. I just feel completely dead, like I can't think anymore.
We have kids too, and I don't want them to grow up in a broken household like I did.
I don't really know why I'm posting, but I haven't told anyone anything yet. No friends or family. If we work it out I don't want them to know what my wife did and judge her for it. But I need to tell someone, and I guess it is Reddit.
TL;DR: Wife cheated, mom passed away
EDIT UPDATE: Thank you all for your advice. I've done a few things. I went to get an STD panel, which will take a few days to get back. I setup a DNA paternity test for each kid to find out the truth. I also asked my wife to leave for a while, and she is going out of town for the next couple weeks. I'm taking the advice given and I'm going to grieve for a while and then I'll start thinking about what the future should hold. No matter what it will hold forgiveness, but I need to figure out if that is together or separated. Also, I've been crying a lot, so...yeah. One of the commenters mentioned "zombie-mode" and that describes me perfectly right now, but thank you all so much for your support. Just feeling like there is someone in my corner means a lot.
I thought I could depend on my wife to be there for me emotionally. I thought she would hold me as I cried, and that I could be safe with her and just let go. Yesterday I was home and was looking through a bunch of stuff in the house when I found some pretty damning evidence of cheating that my wife thought she had hidden. I confronted her with it and she denied and denied and finally admitted to having been sleeping around and also in a longer term affair.
She says she wants to make it work, that I'm her long term and her everything and we are supposed to grow old together. I don't even know how I feel at this point. I just feel completely dead, like I can't think anymore.
We have kids too, and I don't want them to grow up in a broken household like I did.
I don't really know why I'm posting, but I haven't told anyone anything yet. No friends or family. If we work it out I don't want them to know what my wife did and judge her for it. But I need to tell someone, and I guess it is Reddit.
TL;DR: Wife cheated, mom passed away
EDIT UPDATE: Thank you all for your advice. I've done a few things. I went to get an STD panel, which will take a few days to get back. I setup a DNA paternity test for each kid to find out the truth. I also asked my wife to leave for a while, and she is going out of town for the next couple weeks. I'm taking the advice given and I'm going to grieve for a while and then I'll start thinking about what the future should hold. No matter what it will hold forgiveness, but I need to figure out if that is together or separated. Also, I've been crying a lot, so...yeah. One of the commenters mentioned "zombie-mode" and that describes me perfectly right now, but thank you all so much for your support. Just feeling like there is someone in my corner means a lot.
