ndtruecel
Iron
- Joined
- Jul 18, 2025
- Posts
- 34
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- 15
One grows up with a persistent sense that something about them is different. As one moves through social interactions, their difference is repeatedly reflected back onto them.They may experience bullying or exclusion, teachers might label them as lazy/difficult and parents constantly switch between criticism and pressure to better oneself.
Over time, one internalizes these experiences as a personal and moral failing. Instead of thinking "i function differently", they believe they they are inherently bad. Shame becomes a part of their identity. To survive socially, many individuals learn to mask (perform neurotypical behaviors). The person learns that their true self is looked down upon, whilst the performed self is appreciated. Self worth becomes tied to performance, achievements and/or exceptionality.
Because the interial self feels weak and unsafe, external validation becomes a necessity for emotional stability. Feeling special or superior becomes a way to counteract deep shame and chronic feelings of defectiveness. Criticism is experienced not as feedback, but as a threat to their self image, leading to extreme sensitivity.
Over time, one internalizes these experiences as a personal and moral failing. Instead of thinking "i function differently", they believe they they are inherently bad. Shame becomes a part of their identity. To survive socially, many individuals learn to mask (perform neurotypical behaviors). The person learns that their true self is looked down upon, whilst the performed self is appreciated. Self worth becomes tied to performance, achievements and/or exceptionality.
Because the interial self feels weak and unsafe, external validation becomes a necessity for emotional stability. Feeling special or superior becomes a way to counteract deep shame and chronic feelings of defectiveness. Criticism is experienced not as feedback, but as a threat to their self image, leading to extreme sensitivity.
