Vantablack
No Light Escapes
- Joined
- Jun 15, 2025
- Posts
- 920
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- 1,854
Currently, I look better than 99% of the normans in my country. I look better than most people reading this, and many tiktok influencers who have gained success through their looks.
I have had hundereds of matches on Hinge in my lifetime. I have women approach me first (usually 2PSL below me in looks). Almost anywhere I go, I get IOIs from various women, with girls as young as 13 staring at me blatantly. This is significant, since I am pretty old for this forum. (early 20s).
I have slayed some genuinely beautiful girls in my life, the type of girls most guys simply imagine themselves to be with. Not only have I fucked them, I have made many of these girls my slaves. Prime college girls washing my dishes, doing my laundry and so on. Every relations I have had basically been freeuse - I have never been denied sex in a relationship. Most of the time, the women have even higher libidos than me. Women have my name tattooed on them.
I have rich men literally pay for my drinks and drugs JFL. When you are this attractive, you have subhumans orbiting you, thinking that just being around you raises their SMV. I have many stories you will not believe, unless you have experienced it yourself
I am not saying these things to flex. I am recounting these things because, despite all my successes, with women, in life, with everything, I am still jealous, still insecure and still angry.
I have always been an outsider, and I forever will be. My brain neurochemistry is fundamentally different from a normal person, shaped by my experiences in childhood and adolescence. Seeing social groups discuss their plans in front of you and not being invited, as if you did not exist. Being physically bullied by bigger dudes most of my school life, with girls outright pointing and laughing with no shame. In middle school, I went 2 full years without having a single friend. Not one person I could rely upon for conistant social interaction. Crippling lonliness at that young of an age changes you. It changed me to become hyper reliant on myself, and I shut out the outside world
Due to experiences a decade ago, I still don't have anybody I can call a friend. I have temporary hoes I rely upon for emotional validation, but no real male friends. I cannot socialise normally, because I have seen the disgusting and slimy nature of humans. I cannot trust people to open up emotionally so I vent on online forums.
Forming a social bond, a friend group, going out is a normal and necessary part of the human experience, and I will never be able to experience it. I will never be a "part" of the group no matter what I do. It is difficult to put it into words, but I know many of you relate to what I mean. It's like there is an invisible line that seperates you from the rest of the world, and no matter how hard you try, you can never truly cross it to join it. You are disconnected from the normie hivemind that dictates how to feel, how to act, how to speak.
It is absolutely brutal with women too, since they form the core of the hivemind. They can never truly disconnect from it either, and whenever a foid starts talking about her friends/exes/whatever I want to rip her brains out. Even menial things like going for a lunch with some friends pisses me off to no extent because it is something I never really got to experience, and if I do now I know it is going to be superficial and transactional. I know it is irrational, but I cannot help feeling this way, it is an instinctual reaction of pain and anger I have, and I have to consciously remind myself that I am not that boy anymore. I cope by thinking time will heal this, but every story reminds me of the fact that I will never be one of "them" despite how far in the opposite direction of my teenage self I go in my life currently. No matter what I do, nothing ever changes.
I have had hundereds of matches on Hinge in my lifetime. I have women approach me first (usually 2PSL below me in looks). Almost anywhere I go, I get IOIs from various women, with girls as young as 13 staring at me blatantly. This is significant, since I am pretty old for this forum. (early 20s).
I have slayed some genuinely beautiful girls in my life, the type of girls most guys simply imagine themselves to be with. Not only have I fucked them, I have made many of these girls my slaves. Prime college girls washing my dishes, doing my laundry and so on. Every relations I have had basically been freeuse - I have never been denied sex in a relationship. Most of the time, the women have even higher libidos than me. Women have my name tattooed on them.
I have rich men literally pay for my drinks and drugs JFL. When you are this attractive, you have subhumans orbiting you, thinking that just being around you raises their SMV. I have many stories you will not believe, unless you have experienced it yourself
I am not saying these things to flex. I am recounting these things because, despite all my successes, with women, in life, with everything, I am still jealous, still insecure and still angry.
I have always been an outsider, and I forever will be. My brain neurochemistry is fundamentally different from a normal person, shaped by my experiences in childhood and adolescence. Seeing social groups discuss their plans in front of you and not being invited, as if you did not exist. Being physically bullied by bigger dudes most of my school life, with girls outright pointing and laughing with no shame. In middle school, I went 2 full years without having a single friend. Not one person I could rely upon for conistant social interaction. Crippling lonliness at that young of an age changes you. It changed me to become hyper reliant on myself, and I shut out the outside world
Due to experiences a decade ago, I still don't have anybody I can call a friend. I have temporary hoes I rely upon for emotional validation, but no real male friends. I cannot socialise normally, because I have seen the disgusting and slimy nature of humans. I cannot trust people to open up emotionally so I vent on online forums.
Forming a social bond, a friend group, going out is a normal and necessary part of the human experience, and I will never be able to experience it. I will never be a "part" of the group no matter what I do. It is difficult to put it into words, but I know many of you relate to what I mean. It's like there is an invisible line that seperates you from the rest of the world, and no matter how hard you try, you can never truly cross it to join it. You are disconnected from the normie hivemind that dictates how to feel, how to act, how to speak.
It is absolutely brutal with women too, since they form the core of the hivemind. They can never truly disconnect from it either, and whenever a foid starts talking about her friends/exes/whatever I want to rip her brains out. Even menial things like going for a lunch with some friends pisses me off to no extent because it is something I never really got to experience, and if I do now I know it is going to be superficial and transactional. I know it is irrational, but I cannot help feeling this way, it is an instinctual reaction of pain and anger I have, and I have to consciously remind myself that I am not that boy anymore. I cope by thinking time will heal this, but every story reminds me of the fact that I will never be one of "them" despite how far in the opposite direction of my teenage self I go in my life currently. No matter what I do, nothing ever changes.
