Rabbi
Tel Aviv, Israel
- Joined
- Feb 28, 2020
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I have a female coworker and we've become like friends. She is good looking and vocal about certain things, and one thing she stresses upon is how guys who are in their twenties but haven't had a girlfriend are incels.
She knows that I have never had a girlfriend. Though she says that the incel tag doesn't apply to me as i am progressive, humorous and don't have any sexist/misogynistic thoughts about women. She's also mentioned to me the physical traits of what kind of guys she would go out with, I don't fit those, and that's fine.
But honestly the whole talk from her about incels is extremely emasculating for me, it would be the same even if she just outright calls me that.
Whereas I feel like the only reason i don't have a girlfriend is because i am not often in situations where I would meet a number of single women. I can hold good conversations with people (men and women) even when i meet them for the first time. One drawback would be that i tend to keep conversations with women more platonic, and don't dive into talking about topics that might lead to romantic success. I am also not confident about my body which is why i have a hard time approaching women.
Still, I am not a freaking incel, I don't hate women, neither do i follow any of those uneducated male influencers. So, I don't want to be branded like that, it really harms my self image.
She knows that I have never had a girlfriend. Though she says that the incel tag doesn't apply to me as i am progressive, humorous and don't have any sexist/misogynistic thoughts about women. She's also mentioned to me the physical traits of what kind of guys she would go out with, I don't fit those, and that's fine.
But honestly the whole talk from her about incels is extremely emasculating for me, it would be the same even if she just outright calls me that.
Whereas I feel like the only reason i don't have a girlfriend is because i am not often in situations where I would meet a number of single women. I can hold good conversations with people (men and women) even when i meet them for the first time. One drawback would be that i tend to keep conversations with women more platonic, and don't dive into talking about topics that might lead to romantic success. I am also not confident about my body which is why i have a hard time approaching women.
Still, I am not a freaking incel, I don't hate women, neither do i follow any of those uneducated male influencers. So, I don't want to be branded like that, it really harms my self image.
