PTSD Trauma enduced nightmare

[user91295912954]

Right now its 03:57 and I just woke up sweaty, lonely and scared from a dream that was induced by a IRL trauma that happened to me in the beginning of the year, basically i live alone w my mom and she got a high fever one day and had aphasia (condition where makes you speak nonsense) straight for 3 days while I took care of her until she collapsed and had a seizure and I had to call the EMTS and went to the hospital w her, my mom is a very mental health disturbed, negligent and literally useless person in society and has ruined me in unimaginable ways, that episode with the fever was literally because she couldn't take care of herself leading to what happened, my whole family lives in another city and living with this disturbed narcissistic deranged and out of society norms person has ruined my emotional and mental health more than anyone could ever imagine, but I still try to live a normal life outside of that and pretend it doesn't exist, I guess it's my form of coping since I can't remember big parts of my life due to trauma, it hurts seeing my dad and his perfect family every 2 weeks and remembering the times of when my mom was in the hospital and all I ever wanted was them to see my cries of help and how mistreated I was being at home and just take me in to their household, that didnt happen and here I am, 17 failing school failing at everything really in life and with a mom that doesn't have any financial or emotional support for me to start my life, for the past 10 years all I've ever wanted was to get out of this house and move city's so I can stay away forever, I turn 18 next year and if I don't leave this place by then I will possibly end it. I can't take it no more. I have to get fucking rich by next year to leave all this behind, but that still won't change the deep emotional trauma that will be scarred deep in me for the rest of my life, there is a big number of situations that are worse and totally my mothers fault that I won't describe in here, feel free to share your thoughts, support me or curse me it doesn't matter.

 

[estonianslayerr]

Stop placing such a high emphasis on the outcome.

Focus on the present by ammending your mental health, then the outcome (money sucess) will come.

I wish the best for you.

 

[user91295912954]

Stop placing such a high emphasis on the outcome.

Focus on the present by ammending your mental health, then the outcome (money sucess) will come.

I wish the best for you.

Thank you for the advice, it means a lot to me. Wish all the best for you too

 

[user91295912954]

Stop placing such a high emphasis on the outcome.

Focus on the present by ammending your mental health, then the outcome (money sucess) will come.

I wish the best for you.

Also, if you got any tips on how to improve my mental health and overcome the trauma it would be a big help

 

[Deleted member 152014]

Dn
R

D

 

[Whiteboard7]

Right now its 03:57 and I just woke up sweaty, lonely and scared from a dream that was induced by a IRL trauma that happened to me in the beginning of the year, basically i live alone w my mom and she got a high fever one day and had aphasia (condition where makes you speak nonsense) straight for 3 days while I took care of her until she collapsed and had a seizure and I had to call the EMTS and went to the hospital w her, my mom is a very mental health disturbed, negligent and literally useless person in society and has ruined me in unimaginable ways, that episode with the fever was literally because she couldn't take care of herself leading to what happened, my whole family lives in another city and living with this disturbed narcissistic deranged and out of society norms person has ruined my emotional and mental health more than anyone could ever imagine, but I still try to live a normal life outside of that and pretend it doesn't exist, I guess it's my form of coping since I can't remember big parts of my life due to trauma, it hurts seeing my dad and his perfect family every 2 weeks and remembering the times of when my mom was in the hospital and all I ever wanted was them to see my cries of help and how mistreated I was being at home and just take me in to their household, that didnt happen and here I am, 17 failing school failing at everything really in life and with a mom that doesn't have any financial or emotional support for me to start my life, for the past 10 years all I've ever wanted was to get out of this house and move city's so I can stay away forever, I turn 18 next year and if I don't leave this place by then I will possibly end it. I can't take it no more. I have to get fucking rich by next year to leave all this behind, but that still won't change the deep emotional trauma that will be scarred deep in me for the rest of my life, there is a big number of situations that are worse and totally my mothers fault that I won't describe in here, feel free to share your thoughts, support me or curse me it doesn't matter.

I seems bad now but it will getting bhai. The reason your doing bad in school and in life is because of your life circumstances not because of your intelligence or effort. You are a smart person and a kind one you just got screwed over with your current situation, it isn't over though so don't worry.

 

[user91295912954]

I seems bad now but it will getting bhai. The reason your doing bad in school and in life is because of your life circumstances not because of your intelligence or effort. You are a smart person and a kind one you just got screwed over with your current situation, it isn't over though so don't worry.

thank you for your words man, It feels good to know there are still good people in this forum.

 

[Whiteboard7]

thank you for your words man, It feels good to know there are still good people in this forum.

Thanks boss. I truthfully know it will get better for you.

 

[6’3 MTN Cutecel]

Hope things get better for you bro

 

[rawr]

Hope things get better, I have a bad mom and I'm 16, failing school, and super stressed..
We'll get over it bro. You're living in the present and life is hard, but you never know, maybe 5 years down the line you might achieve all of your goals. By then, you'd be glad 17 year old you didn't commit suicide.

Pretty unconventional advice but if I were you, I wouldn't even think about suicide til I'm maybe 30, or 40. At that age, if things really haven't gotten better at all, suicide would make a bit more sense.

 

[user91295912954]

Hope things get better, I have a bad mom and I'm 16, failing school, and super stressed..
We'll get over it bro. You're living in the present and life is hard, but you never know, maybe 5 years down the line you might achieve all of your goals. By then, you'd be glad 17 year old you didn't commit suicide.

Pretty unconventional advice but if I were you, I wouldn't even think about suicide til I'm maybe 30, or 40. At that age, if things really haven't gotten better at all, suicide would make a bit more sense.

i agree, its never over until age gets to you, until then you can always try again, i have faith we are all going to make it, in your case it could be worse, i can tell you are a smart person so you have a lot of opportunities in life, school doesnt define who you will be and you can always turn your life around, hope you have a nice life bhai

 

[rawr]

i agree, its never over until age gets to you, until then you can always try again, i have faith we are all going to make it, in your case it could be worse, i can tell you are a smart person so you have a lot of opportunities in life, school doesnt define who you will be and you can always turn your life around, hope you have a nice life bhai

Thank you man. And yeah, I always think about how stupid it is that school defines most of your life, when it doesn't even define you.

 

[user91295912954]

Hope things get better for you bro

appreciate you bro