FutureSlayer
Connelly-lite wife by 2030 or rope
- Joined
- Oct 4, 2019
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### TRUST GOODBYE
Throwaway Account - Personal story, more of a rant, advice is not required but welcome (*except for therapy, please avoid suggesting it*)
Male, 38, Tuscany, around Florence. Throughout my life, I've had four "significant" relationships. The first one was during my teenage years, roughly from ages 15 to 22. At one point, she moved to Ireland to live and work. After about three weeks, I decided to surprise her with a visit. I bought a plane ticket, went to Ireland, and caught her with a tall, muscular, blonde Norwegian guy. She burst into tears, a textbook pathetic scene, but I didn't let it affect me, and (fortunately) I ended the relationship then and there.
The second relationship began shortly after. I started seeing a friend of my first girlfriend while we were consoling each other. Sparks flew, and for about five years, I experienced the truest and most beautiful love story of my life. Then, she decided she wanted to attend university... in Bologna. I thought, "Well, it's just an hour by train; it should be manageable." So she moved to Bologna and started university. For the first two or three weeks, everything seemed fine. I visited her, and our relationship seemed intact and stable. But from the fourth week on, she completely stopped responding to messages and calls. After five days without a response, I got seriously worried and called her family to check if they knew anything, if she was okay, etc. They replied, "Of course, I talked to her on the phone this morning. Why do you ask?"
At this point, my suspicion grew. I took a train, went to Bologna, and rang her doorbell. She came down with a backpack containing some of my things I had left at her place and said, "I'm sorry, but our future together is compromised. I've met someone else."
I was so deeply devastated that I didn't even have the strength to reply. I took the backpack and went home.
Depression dominated every aspect of my life for a couple of years until I met a wonderful girl. She helped me get out of it, and we had a happy relationship for two years until she confessed that she was seeing her ex again, still loved him, etc. We broke up, but at least she was the only one who had the courage to tell the truth.
About a year and a half later, I met another girl. We hit it off immediately, sharing many common interests. After two years of dating, we moved in together. Everything seemed to be going smoothly, or so I thought, until the fateful day arrived. One evening, we were both on the couch, Netflix and chilling, and we fell asleep. Around 2:30 AM, I woke up to the sound of her phone ringing. I picked it up to stop the ringtone while she was still asleep and saw the caller's name: my best friend. At that point, I opened their WhatsApp chat while she continued to sleep... out came explicit photos and videos, love messages, sexting voice notes, and so on. The chat history went back over a year; I didn't have the strength to scroll any further. I immediately cut ties with both of them. But more than a year after the incident, I still can't trust any woman in any context.
In all likelihood (since it happened in 100% of the cases), I must have behaviors or personality traits that obviously lead my partners to cheat. Unlike all previous relationships, which ended in betrayal, I always had a latent desire to start new relationships, or at least to try. After the last blow, no, I don't have the strength anymore. Perhaps, with age, I now see a much more serene future without anyone by my side.
Thanks to those who read this far!
Strength, courage, and onwards!
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