E
Elias144
Iron
- Joined
- Apr 10, 2025
- Posts
- 13
- Reputation
- 12
How many of you here are schizotypal? It's so fucked up. I wish I could just take a pill and be a different person. This is the worst affliction to have. Its way worse than being unattractive.
I'm incapable of forming meaningful connections with people. It's like there's an invisible barrier between me and everyone else. Like I'm an alien or something. I've always felt that something is wrong with me, that I'm somehow different than everyone else. I thought it must be because I'm unattractive, but I'm not. I'm mtn, 6'2, and white. Girls approached me throughout my life, babies smile at me, guys want to be my friend. I simply can't blame my looks. I tried looksmaxxing (hence me being here), but it makes absolutely no difference because looks wasn't my problem to begin with.
Also, billions of people less attractive than me have no problem making tons of friends and getting girlfriends. It's super frustrating and isolating. People seem to like me, they laugh with me, they invite me to things- but I still feel so lonely and disconnected from everyone. Beyond my looks, beyond my personality- something about my very existence is fundamentally different/wrong.
I'm really contemplating ending it, because I can hardly cope with this existential loneliness anymore. There are a few drugs I still want to try (nardil, ayahuasca, 5g shrooms trip) but I doubt any will help. I'd gladly trade this for anything else- subhuman, autistic, bald, morbidly obese, retarded. Anything.
I'm incapable of forming meaningful connections with people. It's like there's an invisible barrier between me and everyone else. Like I'm an alien or something. I've always felt that something is wrong with me, that I'm somehow different than everyone else. I thought it must be because I'm unattractive, but I'm not. I'm mtn, 6'2, and white. Girls approached me throughout my life, babies smile at me, guys want to be my friend. I simply can't blame my looks. I tried looksmaxxing (hence me being here), but it makes absolutely no difference because looks wasn't my problem to begin with.
Also, billions of people less attractive than me have no problem making tons of friends and getting girlfriends. It's super frustrating and isolating. People seem to like me, they laugh with me, they invite me to things- but I still feel so lonely and disconnected from everyone. Beyond my looks, beyond my personality- something about my very existence is fundamentally different/wrong.
I'm really contemplating ending it, because I can hardly cope with this existential loneliness anymore. There are a few drugs I still want to try (nardil, ayahuasca, 5g shrooms trip) but I doubt any will help. I'd gladly trade this for anything else- subhuman, autistic, bald, morbidly obese, retarded. Anything.
