6ft4
The White Man = Apex Predator Physiognomy
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I worked a job recently where I had to stand outside for a few hours and there was a cross roads and traffic lights right by the building
When there were no cars around my mind could drift without any distractions but when cars would stop at the traffic lights, suddenly my thoughts switched to what the people in the cars were thinking when they looked at me, ie. I can't be standing funny or doing anything aspie with my mouth/jaw as my mind drifts because the people in the car might judge me.. mind you I couldn't actually see the people in the cars due to the distance they were from me so even if they were laughing at me I wouldn't have been able to know.
I am so conditioned to care how people perceive me that my mind immediately switches focus to what some person I cant even see might be thinking about me once a metal box with wheels known as a vehicle enters my field of perception.
For all I know they could be self driving cars with nobody inside, but still I feel when I am faced with something that indicates another human/soul is in the vicinity to judge me, my mind's focus switches entirely to how they are perceiving me and how I can alter myself to get the most favourable perception.
This is a major handicap for navigating life and while people might say "just stop caring what random people think of you bro"
The reason that some people such as myself care so much is because it's a survival instinct which is tied to my natural frame size.
Because I'm an extreme ectomorph, I inherited the evolutionary traits that make me an extreme perceiver of threats so that I can run away because the brain attached to my natural 6'4, 70kg body is programmed to believe that I would have low fighting success if I was forced to fight, which is why my survival mechanism is to be an extreme observer that's sensitive to others perception of me so that I can anticipate danger easily and quickly escape the situation with my light frame and live to observe for another day.
The thing is, the brain attached to my ectomorphic frame isn't programmed to instinctively know that a 6'4 70kg ectomorph would have decent fighting success since the average man is 5'10, it also doesn't know that I managed to ascend beyond my frame since I gymcelled my way to being 85kg of lean muscle which would have good fighting success.
My brain wiring doesn't adapt it's survival strategy to account for the fact Im 98th percentile height and that I have a level of muscle mass that no extreme ecto would have if gyms didnt exist, all it knows is that I'm an extreme ectomorph so it thinks it has to save me from danger by making me hyper sensitive to others perception of me so that I can easily avoid physical confrontations.
I made a thread lately on the chadlite autist who said he struggles to hold eye contact with people for long because its too intense as he feels like he can feel their soul and all of their emotions and trauma through it.
I also mentioned how I feel like an NT can steal my essence from me just by staring into my eyes
looksmax.org
However I believe that for NTs, looking into the eyes of another person feels like how looking into the eyes of a dog feels for me.
When I look into the eyes of a dog I dont care what they think of me, I dont feel their judgement, I dont feel any intensity or danger.
I believe NTs are closer to this when they look into the eyes of other humans altho i am using some hyperbole here.
When your default brain wiring automatically sees everyone as a threat even if they're some 5'8 twink you know you could obliterate, it just makes holding eye contact with anyone seem like a risk you can't deprogram yourself out of caring about.
Some 5'8 twink may as well be a literal NPC to me because of how little physical harm he is capable of bringing to me
I know you could argue that the twink can get a weapon or convince a group of people to attack me and for this reason he remains a threat but if I just started seeing every guy under 5'8 and 65kg as literal non human entities, I'd bet my life that it wouldn't result in any physical harm coming my way.
So this begs the question, why can't I just view every "human" as a non human entity that is simply an NPC that poses no danger to me, rather than me thinking that a vehicle where I can't even see the driver, contains a living soul who's judgement is burning right through my soul?
I am conflicted on whether every "person" I see possesses a soul and it's this soul which I fear judgement from or if it is just the programming of my survival mechanism where I have an extreme sensitivity to danger due to being ecto which is the only reason I care so much of other's judgement.
Psychopaths who often succeed the most in life in terms of finances and relationships as a result of manipulating people do not view other people as having souls and can not feel bad when they harm others because they are able to just view others as NPCs.
When they look into the eyes of another person they feel nothing more than if they were looking into the eyes of a stuffed doll.
Hurting people is no different to killing people in a video game to them.
The physiognomy of some races allows me to feel like causing pain to them would have no karmic consequences because I cannot believe they have a positive soul.
I can only feel they have a negative soul (if they do have a soul) which would mean that any pain that comes their way would be justified.
I am currently unable to view attractive white people as NPCs.
If I rightfully fucked with the lives of piece of shit criminals who's physiognomy suggested they have no soul/ a negative soul so fucking with them was warranted, would it desensitize me and make me realize that harming an NPC is literally no different than hurting someone in a video game thus put it into perspective that holding eye contact with an attractive which girl means nothing because shes closer to being a soulless NPC than I might like to imagine?
When there were no cars around my mind could drift without any distractions but when cars would stop at the traffic lights, suddenly my thoughts switched to what the people in the cars were thinking when they looked at me, ie. I can't be standing funny or doing anything aspie with my mouth/jaw as my mind drifts because the people in the car might judge me.. mind you I couldn't actually see the people in the cars due to the distance they were from me so even if they were laughing at me I wouldn't have been able to know.
I am so conditioned to care how people perceive me that my mind immediately switches focus to what some person I cant even see might be thinking about me once a metal box with wheels known as a vehicle enters my field of perception.
For all I know they could be self driving cars with nobody inside, but still I feel when I am faced with something that indicates another human/soul is in the vicinity to judge me, my mind's focus switches entirely to how they are perceiving me and how I can alter myself to get the most favourable perception.
This is a major handicap for navigating life and while people might say "just stop caring what random people think of you bro"
The reason that some people such as myself care so much is because it's a survival instinct which is tied to my natural frame size.
Because I'm an extreme ectomorph, I inherited the evolutionary traits that make me an extreme perceiver of threats so that I can run away because the brain attached to my natural 6'4, 70kg body is programmed to believe that I would have low fighting success if I was forced to fight, which is why my survival mechanism is to be an extreme observer that's sensitive to others perception of me so that I can anticipate danger easily and quickly escape the situation with my light frame and live to observe for another day.
The thing is, the brain attached to my ectomorphic frame isn't programmed to instinctively know that a 6'4 70kg ectomorph would have decent fighting success since the average man is 5'10, it also doesn't know that I managed to ascend beyond my frame since I gymcelled my way to being 85kg of lean muscle which would have good fighting success.
My brain wiring doesn't adapt it's survival strategy to account for the fact Im 98th percentile height and that I have a level of muscle mass that no extreme ecto would have if gyms didnt exist, all it knows is that I'm an extreme ectomorph so it thinks it has to save me from danger by making me hyper sensitive to others perception of me so that I can easily avoid physical confrontations.
I made a thread lately on the chadlite autist who said he struggles to hold eye contact with people for long because its too intense as he feels like he can feel their soul and all of their emotions and trauma through it.
I also mentioned how I feel like an NT can steal my essence from me just by staring into my eyes
Chadlite with Austism talks about Eye Contact
I can partially relate to this, as I've gotten older I can hold eye contact better in convos with people (eg, new work colleague or dentist etc) but sometimes my mind drifts when they talk then I start thinking about when is it acceptable to break eye contact then I feel under pressure to...
looksmax.org
However I believe that for NTs, looking into the eyes of another person feels like how looking into the eyes of a dog feels for me.
When I look into the eyes of a dog I dont care what they think of me, I dont feel their judgement, I dont feel any intensity or danger.
I believe NTs are closer to this when they look into the eyes of other humans altho i am using some hyperbole here.
When your default brain wiring automatically sees everyone as a threat even if they're some 5'8 twink you know you could obliterate, it just makes holding eye contact with anyone seem like a risk you can't deprogram yourself out of caring about.
Some 5'8 twink may as well be a literal NPC to me because of how little physical harm he is capable of bringing to me
I know you could argue that the twink can get a weapon or convince a group of people to attack me and for this reason he remains a threat but if I just started seeing every guy under 5'8 and 65kg as literal non human entities, I'd bet my life that it wouldn't result in any physical harm coming my way.
So this begs the question, why can't I just view every "human" as a non human entity that is simply an NPC that poses no danger to me, rather than me thinking that a vehicle where I can't even see the driver, contains a living soul who's judgement is burning right through my soul?
I am conflicted on whether every "person" I see possesses a soul and it's this soul which I fear judgement from or if it is just the programming of my survival mechanism where I have an extreme sensitivity to danger due to being ecto which is the only reason I care so much of other's judgement.
Psychopaths who often succeed the most in life in terms of finances and relationships as a result of manipulating people do not view other people as having souls and can not feel bad when they harm others because they are able to just view others as NPCs.
When they look into the eyes of another person they feel nothing more than if they were looking into the eyes of a stuffed doll.
Hurting people is no different to killing people in a video game to them.
The physiognomy of some races allows me to feel like causing pain to them would have no karmic consequences because I cannot believe they have a positive soul.
I can only feel they have a negative soul (if they do have a soul) which would mean that any pain that comes their way would be justified.
I am currently unable to view attractive white people as NPCs.
If I rightfully fucked with the lives of piece of shit criminals who's physiognomy suggested they have no soul/ a negative soul so fucking with them was warranted, would it desensitize me and make me realize that harming an NPC is literally no different than hurting someone in a video game thus put it into perspective that holding eye contact with an attractive which girl means nothing because shes closer to being a soulless NPC than I might like to imagine?
