Xangsane
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CONTEXT
DNRD
In Barcelona, Sarah met Javier, a charming local artist. They had a passionate night together, but Javier soon faded from her life, leaving Sarah to realize that Barcelona, like London, was full of men not looking for anything serious. Despite the disappointment, Sarah returned to London with a sense of hope, determined to keep searching for meaningful love.
Feeling increasingly desperate, Sarah confided in her female travel group on Facebook. Inspired by their advice, she focused on self-love and personal growth, slowly rebuilding her self-esteem and finding joy in her work and hobbies.
By 33, Sarah settled for Mark, a 39-year-old paunchy man who was reliable but unexciting. Despite her lack of enthusiasm, she decided to marry him, hoping for stability and security. Her friends, sharing similar frustrations, supported her as they all faced the realities of their dating lives.
THE STORY
Sarah
In Her Prime:- Appearance: Sarah was an objective 5 in the face, but she was always well-groomed, with a polished appearance reminiscent of a Love Island contestant. She had sandy blonde hair that she kept in stylish waves, bright blue eyes, and a slim, toned figure that she maintained through regular exercise.
- Appearance: In her thirties, Sarah put on a bit of weight, going up three dress sizes. Her grooming habits remained impeccable, though the youthful glow had given way to a more mature look. She still took care of her hair and skin but carried a tiredness that reflected her emotional journey.
Emma
In Her Prime:- Appearance: Emma was a striking 7, with a fit, athletic body from her frequent gym sessions. She had long, platinum blonde hair, sharp green eyes, and a radiant smile. Her strong features and confident demeanor made her stand out in any crowd.
- Appearance: Emma maintained her athletic physique, though her hair showed signs of damage from years of bleaching. Fine lines appeared around her eyes and mouth, and her once radiant smile had dulled slightly due to the stresses of her career and dating life.
Hannah
In Her Prime:- Appearance: Hannah was a natural beauty, an 8 with soft features and a nurturing aura. She had chestnut brown hair that she often wore in loose curls, warm hazel eyes, and a curvy, feminine figure that complemented her gentle personality.
- Appearance: Hannah retained much of her natural beauty, though her hair had a few strands of gray, and her figure had softened slightly after having children. She looked more mature but still radiated warmth and kindness.
Laura
In Her Prime:- Appearance: Laura was a striking 6.5, with a professional, polished look. She had dark brown, sleek hair, piercing blue eyes, and a slender, elegant figure. Her style was always chic and sophisticated, fitting her career in law.
- Appearance: Laura’s sleek hair began to show signs of thinning, and stress lines marked her forehead. Her slender figure remained, though her chic style evolved to accommodate a more practical wardrobe suitable for a busy single mother.
Sophie
In Her Prime:- Appearance: Sophie was a vibrant 7.5, with curly auburn hair, lively brown eyes, and a contagious smile. She had a fit, toned body from her active social life and was always the life of the party, dressed in the latest fashion.
- Appearance: Sophie’s curls had lost some of their bounce, and she had gained a few pounds. Her once flawless skin showed signs of aging, and her party girl glow had dimmed. She still dressed fashionably but had adopted a more understated style.
Rachel
In Her Prime:- Appearance: Rachel was a classic 6, with a reserved beauty. She had shoulder-length, straight brown hair, deep blue eyes behind stylish glasses, and a petite frame. Her look was understated but always neat and put-together.
- Appearance: Rachel’s brown hair had grayed at the temples, and she had developed a few wrinkles. Her petite frame remained, though she appeared more tired due to the demands of balancing work and motherhood. She continued to dress neatly, though more practically.
Amy
In Her Prime:- Appearance: Amy was an adventurous 6.5, with sun-kissed skin, wavy blonde hair, and sparkling green eyes. Her body was athletic and lean, reflecting her love for travel and outdoor activities. She had a carefree, bohemian style that suited her personality.
- Appearance: Amy’s once sun-kissed skin showed signs of aging and sun damage, and her hair was often pulled back in a practical ponytail. Her figure remained lean, but she had developed fine lines and a more rugged look from her travels. Her bohemian style evolved into a more comfortable, traveler’s attire.
Body Counts of the Women:
- Sarah: 92
- Emma: 88
- Hannah: 78
- Laura: 82
- Sophie: 72
- Rachel: 68
- Amy: 100
Realistic Scenarios:
While these numbers are high, they can be realistic under certain circumstances. For example:- Sarah: Frequent travels and a long period of active dating can contribute to a high body count.
- Emma: As a marketing executive with an active social life, meeting many people through work and social events can result in numerous partners.
- Hannah: As a school teacher with a nurturing personality, she might have fewer partners compared to others but still a significant number over time.
- Laura: Balancing a demanding career in law with an active dating life can lead to a high body count.
- Sophie: A vibrant social life and frequent party-going contribute to her higher number.
- Rachel: As an introverted software engineer, her number is relatively lower but still significant.
- Amy: Her adventurous lifestyle and extensive travel experiences can result in a high number of partners.
DNRD
Chapter 1: The Search for Love
Sarah, a 26-year-old university graduate, lived in a crowded flat in central London with six other women. Despite the bustling social life, Sarah felt a gnawing loneliness. She had tried various dating apps but found only fleeting connections. Frustrated, she decided to escape the London dating scene by booking a flight to Barcelona. She hoped the vibrant culture and new experiences would bring her the deep connection she yearned for.In Barcelona, Sarah met Javier, a charming local artist. They had a passionate night together, but Javier soon faded from her life, leaving Sarah to realize that Barcelona, like London, was full of men not looking for anything serious. Despite the disappointment, Sarah returned to London with a sense of hope, determined to keep searching for meaningful love.
Chapter 2: The Struggles Continue
By the time Sarah reached 30, her body count had climbed to 75 as she continued to seek deeper connections both at home and abroad. Burdened by debt and unfulfilled dreams, she tried a new approach: pretending to be 24 on dating apps with old photos. This strategy initially attracted hot guys, but they either stood her up or used her for one-night stands.Feeling increasingly desperate, Sarah confided in her female travel group on Facebook. Inspired by their advice, she focused on self-love and personal growth, slowly rebuilding her self-esteem and finding joy in her work and hobbies.
Chapter 3: Searching for Stability
Sarah and her flatmates, all with high body counts and unfulfilled dreams, embarked on a mission to find the perfect men. Their frustration grew as they saw attractive men with either model-tier women or Asian women. Their resentment led to bitter discussions about the dating scene's unfairness and their own struggles.By 33, Sarah settled for Mark, a 39-year-old paunchy man who was reliable but unexciting. Despite her lack of enthusiasm, she decided to marry him, hoping for stability and security. Her friends, sharing similar frustrations, supported her as they all faced the realities of their dating lives.
Chapter 4: The Epilogue
A decade later, each woman had taken different paths:- Sarah (Body Count: 92): Married Mark, had one child through IVF, and lived a stable, if unremarkable, life.
- Emma (Body Count: 88): Remained single, had a child via sperm donor at 41, and found fulfillment in her career and motherhood.
- Hannah (Body Count: 78): Married Raj, an Indian engineer, and had two children, finding happiness in family life.
- Laura (Body Count: 82): Adopted a child from China, balanced a successful legal career and motherhood.
- Sophie (Body Count: 72): Married Peter, a divorced man with two children, embracing the role of stepmother.
- Rachel (Body Count: 68): Married Michael, a fellow software engineer, and had one child through IVF.
- Amy (Body Count: 100): Remained single and childless by choice, traveling extensively and writing a successful blog.
Reflection
As they navigated their 40s, the women found contentment and fulfillment in the choices they made and the lives they built. Their friendship remained a constant source of strength, proving that, despite their struggles and disappointments, they were never truly alone. They supported each other through the ups and downs, finding solace in their shared experiences and enduring bond.THE STORY
Chapter 1
Sarah, a 26-year-old university graduate, lived in a crowded flat in central London with six other women. The small space was always filled with chatter, laughter, and the occasional squabble, but it was home. Despite the bustling social life, Sarah felt a gnawing loneliness. She had tried various dating apps—Hinge, Bumble, The League—in an attempt to find a committed relationship with a handsome, successful man. Yet, none of these men seemed interested in more than fleeting connections. Her last serious relationship had ended back in sixth form, leaving her yearning for something deeper and more meaningful.
Sarah had slept with a dozen men, often finding herself in one-night stands with guys who were charming and attractive but unwilling to commit. Each time, she hoped for more, but the competition was fierce, and other women often vied for the same attention.
Frustrated and disillusioned by the London dating scene, Sarah decided to take a bold step. She booked a flight to Barcelona, a city she had always dreamed of visiting. The vibrant culture, stunning architecture, and the promise of new experiences beckoned her. She hoped that a change of scenery might bring the fresh start she desperately needed.
As her departure day approached, Sarah's excitement grew. She packed her bags with a mix of practical clothes and a few dresses for nights out, her heart filled with hope. She couldn't help but wonder if the men in Barcelona would be different, if perhaps she could find someone who saw beyond the surface and wanted to build a future with her.
The morning of her flight, Sarah woke up early, her flatmates still asleep. She quietly slipped out, her suitcase in tow, and headed to the airport. As she boarded the plane, she felt a mixture of nervousness and exhilaration. This trip was more than just a holiday; it was a chance to escape the disappointments of the past and seek something better.
Touching down in Barcelona, Sarah was greeted by the warm Mediterranean air and the lively sounds of the city. She checked into a charming boutique hotel and, after a quick shower, set out to explore. Her phone buzzed with a notification from a dating app. She had set her location to Barcelona before leaving London, curious to see who might be interested in meeting a new arrival.
One message stood out—Javier, a local artist with a profile full of interesting photos and a message that was both charming and inviting. He suggested meeting at a café that evening, promising to show her some of the city's hidden gems. Feeling a spark of excitement, Sarah agreed.
As she prepared for the evening, she couldn't help but feel a sense of hope. Maybe, just maybe, Barcelona would offer her not just adventure, but the meaningful connection she had been searching for. With a final glance in the mirror, she headed out, ready to embrace whatever the night—and the city—had in store for her.
Sarah felt a mix of excitement and nervousness as she walked to the café where she was to meet Javier. The streets of Barcelona were alive with the sounds of evening chatter and the aroma of delicious food. She arrived at the quaint café and saw Javier waiting outside, his dark hair and easy smile instantly recognizable.
"Sarah, it's great to finally meet you," Javier greeted her warmly, giving her a friendly kiss on each cheek.
"Nice to meet you too, Javier," Sarah replied, smiling. "This place looks wonderful."
"It’s one of my favorites," he said as they walked inside and found a cozy corner table. "I thought you might like to try some authentic tapas."
The evening began with light conversation about their backgrounds. Sarah shared stories about her life in London, her struggles with the dating scene, and her love for traveling. Javier talked about his work as an artist, his favorite spots in Barcelona, and his passion for the city’s vibrant culture.
"London sounds amazing," Javier said, leaning forward. "But I can understand why you'd want a change. Barcelona has a way of capturing your heart."
"I hope so," Sarah replied, looking into his eyes. "I’ve always wanted to experience life somewhere different, and I’m really glad I met someone like you to show me around."
They laughed and chatted through several plates of tapas and glasses of wine. Sarah felt a growing connection with Javier, enjoying his charm and the way he seemed genuinely interested in her stories. As the night progressed, he suggested they take a walk to a nearby viewpoint.
The city lights glittered below as they reached the top of a hill. Javier pointed out landmarks and shared tales of the city’s history. They stood close together, the conversation naturally flowing. Javier turned to her, his expression softening.
"You’re really special, Sarah," he said, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "I’m glad we met tonight."
"Me too," Sarah replied, her heart racing.
He leaned in and kissed her gently. She responded, deepening the kiss, feeling a mix of desire and hope. They returned to her hotel, the attraction between them palpable. Once inside her room, their kisses grew more passionate, and they quickly found themselves undressing each other.
They tumbled onto the bed, Javier's hands exploring her body. He was skilled, taking his time to ensure she was comfortable and aroused. They shifted into various positions, ultimately ending with Sarah on top, riding him while they both moaned in pleasure. The connection felt intense and real to her, and she hoped it was the start of something lasting.
The next morning, Sarah woke up to an empty bed. Javier had left a note on the bedside table: "Had to leave early for work. Last night was amazing. Let’s meet again soon. –Javier."
Sarah’s heart sank a bit, but she tried to stay optimistic. Maybe he was genuinely busy. She spent the day exploring the city, trying to keep herself from overthinking. However, as the hours passed, Javier's messages became less frequent and more sporadic.
Days turned into a week, and Sarah realized Javier was not interested in more than just a fleeting romance. She felt a mix of disappointment and frustration. It seemed Barcelona, too, had its share of men who were not looking for anything serious.
Returning to her flat in London, Sarah reflected on her experience. Despite the brief fling with Javier, she cherished the memories of Barcelona. She vowed to keep searching for a genuine connection, holding onto the hope that somewhere, her long-term relationship was waiting.
Feeling disheartened after her experience with Javier in Barcelona, Sarah decided to vent her frustrations on a female travel group she was part of on Facebook. She typed out a long post, detailing her hopes and disappointments, seeking solace and advice from other women who might have faced similar situations. The comments poured in, full of empathy and encouragement. Many suggested that she keep her chin up and continue to seek new adventures. One comment caught her eye: "Have you ever considered Southeast Asia? The culture, the beauty, and the freedom to meet new people can be life-changing."
Inspired by the suggestion, Sarah decided to book a flight to Thailand. The idea of exploring Southeast Asia had always intrigued her, and now seemed like the perfect opportunity. She packed her bags once more, this time with lighter clothes suitable for the tropical climate, and set off with renewed hope.
Landing in Bangkok, Sarah was immediately captivated by the city's vibrant energy. The bustling markets, the rich scents of street food, and the warm, humid air enveloped her. She checked into a cozy hostel known for its social atmosphere, hoping to meet fellow travelers.
That evening, Sarah attended a hostel-organized event, where she mingled with other guests. Among them was Jake, a tall, athletic man with sun-kissed skin and a friendly demeanor. He was a 30-year-old Australian, traveling through Southeast Asia on a break from his finance job. They hit it off instantly, exchanging stories of their travels and their lives back home.
"Thailand is incredible," Jake said, his blue eyes twinkling. "I’ve been here for a few weeks and it just keeps getting better. You should join me tomorrow; I’m planning to explore some islands."
"That sounds amazing," Sarah replied, feeling a spark of excitement. "I’d love to join you."
The next day, they set off early to catch a ferry to a nearby island. They spent the day lounging on pristine beaches, snorkeling in crystal-clear waters, and enjoying the local cuisine. The chemistry between them grew stronger with each passing moment. As the sun set, painting the sky in hues of orange and pink, they found themselves alone on a secluded part of the beach.
Jake looked at Sarah, a soft smile playing on his lips. "This has been an incredible day," he said, his voice low and sincere.
"It really has," Sarah agreed, feeling a flutter in her chest.
They moved closer, their lips meeting in a passionate kiss. The setting felt surreal, like something out of a dream. Jake gently guided her down onto the soft sand, their kisses growing more urgent. He undressed her slowly, savoring each moment, and she did the same, their clothes quickly becoming a forgotten heap beside them.
Jake's hands roamed her body, sending shivers of pleasure through her. He was attentive and tender, making sure she was comfortable and enjoying every second. They shifted into a comfortable position, with Jake on top, moving with a slow, deliberate rhythm. The sound of the waves crashing nearby and the cool evening breeze added to the intensity of the moment.
Sarah wrapped her legs around him, pulling him closer, her moans blending with the sounds of the night. They moved together in perfect harmony, the connection between them undeniable. After they climaxed, Jake rolled to the side, pulling Sarah into his arms. They lay there, basking in the afterglow and the magic of their surroundings.
The next morning, they woke up to the gentle rays of the sun and the distant calls of birds. Jake turned to Sarah, his expression soft and warm. "Last night was incredible," he said, brushing a strand of hair from her face.
"It really was," Sarah replied, feeling a mix of happiness and contentment.
They spent the rest of their time in Thailand exploring together, but as their travel plans eventually diverged, they parted ways with a promise to stay in touch. While it wasn’t the long-term relationship Sarah had hoped for, the experience taught her to embrace the moment and cherish the connections she made along the way.
After her adventure in Thailand, Sarah felt invigorated and decided to continue her journey through Southeast Asia. Her next destination was Bali, an island known for its beautiful beaches, vibrant nightlife, and spiritual retreats. She hoped that Bali would offer her more opportunities to meet interesting people and create unforgettable memories.
Upon arriving in Bali, Sarah checked into a popular hostel in Canggu, an area famous for its surf spots and lively social scene. The hostel was a haven for young travelers, with a communal area that buzzed with energy day and night. Sarah quickly made friends with other guests, many of whom were also solo travelers from various parts of the world.
One evening, as she was lounging by the pool, she struck up a conversation with Tom, a charming Brit in his late twenties. He had a rugged look, with stubble and tousled hair, and he exuded a laid-back vibe that Sarah found appealing.
“Bali is amazing, isn’t it?” Tom said, sipping his beer. “I’ve been here for a week, and I don’t think I ever want to leave.”
“It really is,” Sarah agreed. “There’s something magical about this place. How long are you staying?”
“A couple more weeks, at least. Want to join me for a beach party tonight? I hear it’s going to be epic.”
“Sure, why not?” Sarah smiled, feeling a flutter of excitement.
That night, they danced under the stars at a beach party, the music pumping and the waves crashing nearby. The atmosphere was electric, and Sarah felt alive and carefree. As the night wore on, she and Tom grew closer, their bodies moving in sync with the music. Eventually, they slipped away from the crowd and found a quiet spot on the beach.
They shared a passionate kiss, the chemistry between them undeniable. Soon, their hands were exploring each other’s bodies, the heat between them intensifying. Tom gently laid her down on the sand, their clothes quickly discarded. They made love under the stars, the cool breeze and the sound of the ocean heightening their senses. Tom was attentive and skilled, making sure Sarah was completely satisfied.
The next morning, they woke up in each other’s arms, the sun rising over the horizon. “Last night was incredible,” Tom said, his voice soft and sincere.
“It really was,” Sarah replied, feeling a mix of satisfaction and wistfulness.
Over the next few weeks, Sarah continued to explore Bali, meeting other travelers along the way. She had brief flings with several men, all of them white tourists like herself. There was Chris, an adventurous American with a love for surfing; Lars, a friendly Dutchman who taught her how to ride a scooter; and Marco, an Italian chef who cooked her a delicious dinner before spending the night together.
Each encounter was exciting and fun, but none of them led to anything long-term. While Sarah enjoyed the freedom and thrill of these short-lived romances, she couldn’t help but feel a lingering sense of emptiness. She realized that while she was making amazing memories and connections, she still longed for a deeper, more meaningful relationship.
As her time in Bali came to an end, Sarah reflected on her journey. She had learned a lot about herself and what she wanted in a partner. Although she hadn’t found lasting love, she cherished the experiences and the people she had met along the way. With a renewed sense of purpose, she decided to head back home to London, hopeful that her adventures would continue and that, one day, she would find the meaningful connection she had been searching for.
After her adventures in Bali, Sarah felt a mix of exhilaration and frustration. She still hadn’t found the deep connection she was searching for. Inspired by her previous travels, she decided to try something "a little more exotic" and booked a trip to the Dominican Republic. The island's rich culture, beautiful beaches, and vibrant nightlife called to her, and she hoped it might offer something different.
Upon arriving in Santo Domingo, Sarah was struck by the city's lively atmosphere and the warmth of its people. She checked into a boutique hotel and soon found herself exploring the local scene. However, she quickly noticed that the majority of the men she encountered were black or had mixed heritage. Initially, she felt a bit disheartened as she had hoped to meet more white tourists, but she decided to keep an open mind and embrace the experience.
One evening, at a beach bar, she met Andre, a local with a charismatic personality and a contagious laugh. He had a laid-back demeanor and spoke in a mix of English and Spanish, often slipping into African American Vernacular English (AAVE) when he was relaxed.
"Hey, girl, you new around here?" Andre asked, flashing a charming smile.
"Yeah, just arrived a few days ago," Sarah replied, intrigued by his easy confidence.
"Let me show you how we do it in the DR. You down for some real fun?"
Sarah agreed, and they spent the evening dancing to reggaeton and bachata, the music pulsating through the warm night air. Andre was an excellent dancer, moving with a fluid grace that captivated her. They laughed and chatted, sharing stories and drinks.
As the night wore on, they found themselves walking along the beach, the moon casting a silver glow on the waves. Andre turned to her, his eyes softening. "You know, you got a real nice vibe. I like that."
"Thanks," Sarah replied, feeling a warm flutter in her chest. "I’m having a great time."
He leaned in, and they kissed, the connection immediate and intense. They made their way back to Sarah’s hotel room, the anticipation building. Andre was gentle yet passionate, ensuring Sarah felt comfortable and cherished. Their movements were rhythmic and in sync, a dance of pleasure and connection. The experience was both exhilarating and tender, leaving Sarah breathless.
The next morning, Andre left with a promise to see her again. Over the next few weeks, Sarah continued to meet and connect with local men. She met Carlos, a bartender with a quick wit and a charming smile, and Luis, a tour guide who showed her the hidden gems of the island. Each encounter was unique, filled with laughter, dance, and passionate nights.
Carlos had a smooth and easy-going nature, often speaking in AAVE as they joked and shared stories. "Girl, you crazy," he’d say, laughing as they walked hand-in-hand along the beach. Their nights together were filled with playful teasing and tender moments, Carlos always making sure Sarah was comfortable and satisfied.
Luis, on the other hand, had a more intense demeanor. He was attentive and deeply passionate, his movements deliberate and skilled. "You feelin' good, baby?" he’d whisper, ensuring she was always at ease and enjoying herself.
Despite the wonderful experiences, Sarah still felt a sense of longing for something more permanent. Her time in the Dominican Republic was coming to an end, and while she cherished the memories and connections she had made, she realized that what she truly sought was a lasting relationship.
Returning to London, Sarah felt a mix of gratitude and hope. Her travels had taught her much about herself and what she wanted in a partner. Although she hadn’t found her long-term relationship, she remained optimistic, knowing that her adventures were far from over and that the world was full of possibilities.
Returning to London, Sarah was plagued by a mix of emotions. She had enjoyed her time in the Dominican Republic and the connections she had made, but a nagging feeling of regret and self-judgment lingered. She felt conflicted about her choices, especially as she reflected on her decision to sleep with men who were different from her usual type. Despite the passion and excitement, she couldn’t shake the feeling that she had strayed from her original intentions.
In total, Sarah had slept with twenty-three men. Each encounter, whether fleeting or more meaningful, added to her growing sense of dissatisfaction. She yearned for a deep, committed relationship but found herself continually drawn to the thrill of new experiences, often with men who were not interested in anything long-term.
Sarah's insistence on finding an attractive partner further complicated her search for commitment. She had always set high standards for herself, refusing to settle for anyone she didn't find physically appealing. However, reality struck hard as she realized that these attractive men, often rated well above her own self-perceived 5/10 looks, were not willing to commit. They enjoyed the casual flings and the excitement of her adventurous spirit but ultimately moved on to pursue other options.
One evening, sitting in her small, cluttered flat, Sarah reflected on her journey. She logged onto the same female travel group on Facebook that had previously given her encouragement. She decided to share her feelings honestly, hoping for some clarity and support.
"Hi everyone," she began typing. "I just got back from the Dominican Republic. It was an amazing adventure, but I’m struggling with some mixed feelings. I’ve been on this quest for a meaningful relationship, but I keep finding myself in short-term flings. I’ve slept with 23 men now, and I can't help but feel a bit lost. I also feel kind of ashamed that I went for men outside my usual type. I guess I just needed to vent and maybe get some advice."
The responses came quickly, filled with empathy and understanding. Many women shared their own stories of searching for love and the struggles they faced. Some reminded her that everyone’s journey is unique and encouraged her not to judge herself too harshly. Others suggested focusing on self-love and personal growth rather than constantly seeking validation through relationships.
Inspired by the supportive comments, Sarah decided to take a break from dating. She realized that her worth was not determined by the number of men she had slept with or their attractiveness. She needed to focus on herself, her passions, and her goals.
Over the following months, Sarah threw herself into her work and hobbies. She traveled occasionally but with a different mindset, seeking experiences for personal growth rather than for meeting men. She started volunteering at a local charity, took up painting, and reconnected with old friends. Slowly, she began to feel more confident and content with who she was.
In time, Sarah hoped that by focusing on her own happiness and self-improvement, she might naturally attract the kind of deep, meaningful relationship she had always desired. She learned to embrace her past, understanding that each experience, whether good or bad, had shaped her into the person she was. And with that newfound self-awareness, she looked forward to a future where she could find true, lasting love.
Sarah, still feeling restless and searching for something she couldn’t quite define, decided to take another trip, this time to Cancun. Known for its stunning beaches and vibrant nightlife, Cancun promised adventure and excitement. She hoped that maybe, amidst the sun and the sea, she might find the long-term relationship she craved.
Upon arriving, she checked into an upscale resort famous for its all-inclusive packages and lively social events. It didn’t take long for Sarah to immerse herself in the party scene, mingling with both locals and other tourists. The resort's atmosphere was electric, filled with beautiful people, loud music, and endless opportunities for fun.
One evening, she attended a beach party where the drinks flowed freely, and the energy was high. She met a group of attractive men, a mix of locals and white tourists, who welcomed her into their circle. Among them were Alejandro, a charming Mexican with a killer smile, and Brian, an athletic American with piercing blue eyes.
As the night progressed, the group’s conversation and dancing grew more intimate. There was an unspoken understanding that tonight was about indulgence and pleasure. When the party started to wind down, Alejandro suggested they continue the festivities in his suite. Sarah, fueled by the thrill of the night and her desire for connection, agreed.
In Alejandro’s spacious suite, the mood shifted from playful to seductive. The group of men and women paired off, exploring each other with a mix of curiosity and lust. Sarah found herself caught between Alejandro and Brian, their hands and lips exploring her body with expert precision. The atmosphere was charged with raw, uninhibited energy.
They moved to the bedroom, where the night turned into a blur of passion and pleasure. Sarah experienced an intense, primal connection with both men, their bodies moving in a rhythm that felt both chaotic and perfectly synchronized. They took turns pleasuring her, their touches and movements blending together in a symphony of sensation. The encounters were varied and adventurous, with Alejandro's sensuality and Brian's athletic prowess combining to create an unforgettable experience.
The orgy lasted well into the early hours of the morning, with Sarah finding herself lost in the moment, swept away by the intensity of it all. She felt a fleeting sense of connection with each man, hoping that maybe, amidst this hedonistic experience, she might find someone who wanted more than just a night of passion.
However, as dawn approached and the others began to leave, it became clear that this was just another fleeting encounter. Alejandro kissed her softly and whispered, "You’re amazing, Sarah. I had a great time." Brian echoed similar sentiments, giving her a warm but casual smile before departing.
Left alone in the suite, Sarah felt a wave of emptiness wash over her. The excitement of the night had faded, leaving her with the stark reality that she was once again searching for something more substantial in the wrong places.
She returned to her resort room, physically satisfied but emotionally drained. Lying in bed, she reflected on her journey and the choices she had made. She realized that her pursuit of an ideal relationship through fleeting physical connections was not fulfilling her deeper needs.
Sarah decided it was time for a change. She needed to stop chasing after moments of temporary pleasure and start focusing on building a life that made her happy, regardless of whether it included a partner. She resolved to take a break from her quest for love and instead concentrate on her own personal growth and happiness.
As she packed her bags to return to London, Sarah felt a sense of clarity. Her adventures had taught her valuable lessons about herself and what she truly wanted. With a renewed sense of purpose, she looked forward to creating a future where she was happy and fulfilled on her own terms, and open to love when it came to her naturally.
Chapter 2
At 30 years old, Sarah had reached a point where she was starting to feel the weight of her choices. Over the years, she had continued her pattern of seeking out excitement and connection through countless hookups, both at home and abroad. Her body count had reached 75, a testament to her relentless pursuit of a deeper connection that always seemed just out of reach. Despite a stable white-collar job in London, her frequent travels and lifestyle had plunged her into severe debt. She still lived in the same cramped flat with six other university graduate women who shared similar stories of disappointment and unfulfilled dreams.
Feeling increasingly desperate and depressed about her inability to find a meaningful relationship, Sarah decided to take a drastic step. She created new profiles on various dating apps, but this time, she pretended to be 24. She uploaded photos from her university days, back when she was three dress sizes smaller and full of youthful optimism.
The strategy worked, at least initially. Hot guys began matching with her, lured by her photos and the carefully curated image she presented. They chatted enthusiastically, and many asked her out on dates. Each new match brought a flicker of hope, a chance that this time might be different.
However, the reality was harsh. The first date stood her up, leaving her sitting alone in a trendy bar, her carefully applied makeup and new dress feeling like a cruel joke. The second date showed up but made it clear that he was only interested in one thing. Despite her reservations, Sarah went along, hoping that maybe if she satisfied him physically, he might stick around. But just like before, he disappeared the next morning, leaving her feeling used and more empty than before.
This pattern repeated itself with painful regularity. Every promising conversation turned into a brief fling or a night of empty passion. Each time, the men she met would seem charming and interested, only to reveal their true intentions after they got what they wanted. Sarah felt increasingly disillusioned and bitter, her self-esteem taking a hit with each failed attempt at finding love.
One evening, after yet another disappointing encounter, Sarah found herself back in her flat, staring at her reflection in the mirror. She barely recognized the woman looking back at her. The sparkle in her eyes had dimmed, and the weight of her experiences showed in the lines on her face and the slump of her shoulders.
She logged onto her Facebook group, the one place where she could vent without judgment. "Hi everyone," she typed. "I’m feeling really low tonight. I've tried everything to find a meaningful relationship, but it seems like all the good men are gone. I’m tired of being used and lied to. What am I doing wrong?"
The responses poured in, a mix of sympathy and tough love. Some advised her to focus on herself and her well-being, suggesting she take a break from dating entirely. Others shared similar stories, reminding her she wasn't alone in her struggle.
One comment stood out: "Sarah, maybe it's time to be honest with yourself and others. You're amazing just as you are, but pretending to be someone else won’t bring you real love. Focus on what makes you happy and fulfilled. The right person will come along when you least expect it."
Taking a deep breath, Sarah decided it was time for a change. She deleted the deceptive profiles and vowed to be honest about who she was. She sought help for her debt and began focusing on her health and happiness. Slowly, she started to rebuild her self-esteem, finding joy in her work, hobbies, and friendships.
While the road ahead was uncertain, Sarah felt a renewed sense of hope. She realized that true happiness couldn't be found through others, but from within. And as she worked on loving herself, she held onto the belief that the right person would come into her life when the time was right.
Sarah's flatmates, much like herself, were all in their late twenties to early thirties, each with their own unique stories and struggles. Here are the profiles of the six women she shared her flat with:
Sarah and her flatmates were having a leisurely Saturday afternoon together. They decided to head out for brunch at a trendy café in Notting Hill, a favorite spot known for its charming atmosphere and beautiful patrons. As they sat at a table near the window, enjoying their avocado toast and mimosas, a man walked by outside that immediately caught their attention.
He was, by all accounts, breathtaking. He had an exotic, captivating appearance with tan skin that seemed to glow in the sunlight. His eyes were a mesmerizing shade of amber, full of depth and intensity, framed by thick, long lashes that any woman would envy. His brows were perfectly shaped, giving his face a refined yet masculine look. He had full, sensual lips and a strong jawline, complemented by a perfect smile. His hair was thick and styled effortlessly, a touch of natural waves giving it a carefree yet polished look. His body was the epitome of fitness – muscular and well-proportioned, yet not overly bulky, hinting at both strength and agility.
However, what caught their eye even more was the woman beside him. She was a petite, short Chinese woman, delicately beautiful in her own right, but seemingly ordinary compared to the godlike presence of the man. They both wore wedding bands, and the way he looked at her, with genuine affection and adoration, was unmistakable.
Sarah and her flatmates exchanged looks, a mix of shock and resentment clouding their faces. Emma was the first to speak, her voice dripping with disbelief. "Are you kidding me? How does someone like him end up with her?"
Hannah's face twisted with anger. "It's not fair. We put so much effort into looking good, and yet these men go for... that?"
Laura, who had always prided herself on her appearance, especially her bleached hair and meticulous grooming, shook her head. "I mean, look at us. We spend hours grooming, making sure we look perfect. And he’s with her? It’s just... insulting."
Sophie, usually the most diplomatic, couldn't hide her frustration. "I don't get it. We're white, we're beautiful, and we can't even get a decent guy to commit. And then these guys, the really hot ones, end up with these Asian women. It's like, what's the point?"
Rachel, usually more reserved, added quietly, "I see this all the time. The hottest guys with these Asian women. It makes me so angry."
Amy sighed, her expression one of resigned bitterness. "It's like they don't even see us. We bleach our hair, work out, do everything to look perfect, and they go for someone who doesn’t even try."
Their resentment started to morph into an ugly form of racism, their words becoming sharper and more hurtful as they vented their frustrations.
"I swear, I see one more hot white guy with a Japanese or Korean girl, I'm going to lose it," Emma muttered, her face flushed with anger.
"They must have some sort of spell over these guys," Hannah said bitterly. "It’s the only explanation."
As they continued their brunch, the mood had soured significantly. Their conversation turned to their own dating failures, each of them sharing flashbacks of times when they had been passed over for other women, often of Asian descent.
Emma recalled, "Remember that guy I dated last year? He left me for a Korean girl. Said she was 'different.' Whatever that means."
Laura nodded. "I had a guy ghost me and then saw him a week later with a Japanese woman. It's like we don't even stand a chance."
They left the café that day feeling more disheartened and bitter than before. Their envy and frustration had led them down a path of resentment and racism, unable to see past their own prejudices and insecurities. Despite all their efforts to find love and commitment, they found themselves trapped in a cycle of disappointment, unable to understand why their beauty and efforts seemed to go unnoticed by the men they desired most.
As the weeks went by, Sarah and her flatmates' frustration grew. They continued to see attractive white men with Asian women, and it seemed to them that the only men who were interested in them were black or Indian. This only added to their growing resentment, especially for Sarah, who had had numerous hookups with black men in the Dominican Republic. She felt conflicted, battling between her past experiences and her current discontent.
One evening, the flatmates gathered in their living room for a night in, hoping to lift their spirits. Emma, who had just returned from another disappointing date, started the conversation.
"I don’t get it," she said, flopping onto the couch. "Why is it that the only men who seem to be interested in us are black or Indian? Where are all the attractive white men who want to commit?"
Hannah, nodding in agreement, added, "It's like we’re invisible to them. They just don’t see us as relationship material."
Sarah, feeling a knot of frustration in her stomach, chimed in. "I had so many hookups in the Dominican Republic, but none of those men wanted anything more. And now, it feels like I'm stuck in the same pattern here."
Laura leaned forward, her voice tinged with bitterness. "I’m tired of putting so much effort into my appearance and getting nowhere. It's like the only men who approach me are the ones I’m not interested in."
Sophie, who had been scrolling through her dating app, sighed. "Look at this. My matches are almost entirely black or Indian men. Not that there’s anything wrong with them, but why can’t I find a decent white guy who’s interested in more than just a fling?"
Rachel, usually the most reserved, spoke up. "It’s frustrating. We all want the same thing—a long-term relationship with someone who appreciates us. Why is that so hard to find?"
Amy, pouring herself another glass of wine, said, "It feels like we’re being overlooked. We work so hard to look good, to be interesting and fun, but it’s never enough for the men we really want."
Their conversation grew more heated as they vented their frustrations, their words becoming more charged with resentment and anger.
"I just don’t understand why we’re only getting attention from these guys," Emma said, her voice rising. "It’s like we’re not good enough for the attractive white men."
Hannah nodded vigorously. "And it’s not just us. Look around. How many other white women are in the same boat? It’s infuriating."
Sarah, feeling a wave of conflicting emotions, added, "I know I’ve hooked up with black men before, but that was different. I was looking for something real, and it never materialized."
Laura, shaking her head, said, "We deserve better. We deserve men who see our worth and want to commit to us, not just use us for a night."
Their anger and disappointment continued to fester, leading them to develop a deep-seated resentment not just towards the men they desired, but also towards those who seemed to effortlessly attract their attention.
One evening, while watching a romantic movie, they saw yet another scene featuring a beautiful couple. The man was a handsome, white model-type, and the woman was Asian.
"Of course," Sophie scoffed. "It’s everywhere. It’s like a slap in the face."
Emma turned to the group, her face flushed with anger. "I’m so tired of this. We deserve love and commitment just as much as anyone else."
Their shared experiences and mutual frustrations only seemed to deepen their bonds, but also their prejudices. They found themselves caught in a vicious cycle of longing and resentment, struggling to find the love and validation they so desperately sought.
Sarah and her flatmates, feeling the sting of their recent dating failures, decided to embark on a mission to find the perfect men. They spent their weekends in various parts of London, from high-end Mayfair bars to trendy spots in Shoreditch, hoping to meet the elusive "6'5 trust fund blue eyes" type. However, reality hit hard as they observed the couples around them, realizing that the men they desired were often with either East Asian/hapa women or model-tier white/white adjacent women.
Couple 1:
Couple 11:
Hannah sighed, rolling her eyes. "Why do these women always go for guys who aren't even their ethnicity if they're going to show off like that? Such hypocrites."
Laura shook her head, a mix of annoyance and frustration on her face. "It’s so cringe. They won't date actual men from their own ethnic background unless they look white enough. It’s ridiculous."
Sarah couldn’t help but feel a pang of anger and jealousy. She had worked so hard on her appearance, put so much effort into trying to find a meaningful relationship, and yet here she was, watching the men she dreamed of being with, happily paired with women who seemed to get everything she wanted so effortlessly.
As they continued their hunt around London, the reality of their situation became clearer. The men they desired were often already taken by women who, in their eyes, seemed less deserving. It left them feeling more frustrated and disheartened than ever. The night ended with the flatmates returning home, their spirits dampened, and their resolve tested, each of them silently wondering what it would take to find the love they so desperately sought.
The atmosphere in the upscale Mayfair bar was buzzing with energy, but Sarah and her flatmates were simmering with frustration. They watched as two couples, particularly conspicuous in their behavior, seemed to be flaunting their relationships in a way that grated on the group of white women.
Couple 1:
The Armenian man, smiling indulgently, nodded. "Yeah, it’s great that we found each other. Our backgrounds just blend so perfectly."
Emma, overhearing this, muttered under her breath, "Oh please, she’s only with him because he looks white."
Hannah, equally annoyed, added, "And she’s making sure everyone knows it. So transparent."
The second couple, the Korean woman and her Brazilian boyfriend, were similarly engaged in a public display of their 'wokeness.' "I love my Latino man," the Korean woman said, her voice dripping with performative pride. "Brazilians have such a vibrant culture, and it's amazing to be with someone who appreciates diversity as much as I do."
Her boyfriend, tanned and muscular, kissed her on the cheek. "You’re right, babe. It’s all about understanding and appreciating each other's backgrounds."
Laura, unable to contain her irritation, whispered to her friends, "She’s probably never even looked twice at an actual Asian guy. But she’s so woke because she’s dating someone who’s mixed."
Sophie, sipping her drink more aggressively than usual, agreed. "It’s so hypocritical. They act all superior and enlightened, but they only go for men who look white enough to fit their standards."
The Korean woman, noticing the group of white women, turned slightly and spoke louder. "Isn’t it wonderful to be with someone who’s so open-minded? I feel sorry for people who can’t appreciate the beauty of multicultural relationships."
Sarah, feeling a surge of anger, leaned closer to her friends. "They’re just doing this to make us feel bad. It’s not about being multicultural, it’s about showing off that they can get these men."
Emma nodded. "Exactly. They’re pretending to be so progressive, but it's clear they only want men who look white. It’s so fake."
The Chinese woman, now speaking directly to her Armenian boyfriend but loud enough for the surrounding tables to hear, continued. "I’ve always been drawn to men with rich cultural backgrounds. I can’t imagine being with someone who isn’t as open-minded as you."
The Armenian man, somewhat oblivious to the tension he was causing, responded warmly. "I feel the same way, love. We’re so lucky to have found each other."
The blatant displays of 'wokeness' and the transparent attempts to flaunt their relationships only deepened the resentment among Sarah and her friends. The evening, which had begun with a hopeful search for meaningful connections, ended in a bitter reflection on their own perceived inadequacies and the societal pressures they felt were stacked against them.
As they left the bar, Emma voiced what they were all thinking. "We need to stop focusing on these superficial standards and find someone who truly values us for who we are."
Hannah sighed. "Easier said than done. But you’re right. We deserve better than this constant competition and these fake woke displays."
Sarah, feeling a mix of determination and resignation, nodded. "Let’s just focus on ourselves for now. Maybe if we stop looking so hard, the right person will come along."
With that, the group resolved to support each other more and to look beyond the superficialities that had plagued their dating lives. The journey ahead was uncertain, but they hoped it would lead to more genuine and fulfilling connections.
As Sarah and her flatmates made their way back to their flat, their frustration boiled over into a heated discussion. They couldn’t stop talking about the couples they had seen, especially the hot white men with the Asian women who, in their eyes, seemed less attractive.
"Seriously, what is going on?" Emma fumed as she unlocked the door to their flat. "Why are all these hot white guys either with other model-tier white women or these dumpy-looking Asian girls?"
Hannah threw her bag onto the couch and sank into a chair. "I don’t get it either. It’s like, what do they see in them? I mean, no offense, but we put so much effort into looking good, and it feels like we’re invisible to them."
Laura poured herself a glass of wine and took a deep sip. "I’ve been thinking about this a lot. Maybe it’s some kind of exotic fetish thing. Like, they think they’re being all worldly and progressive by dating outside their race."
Sophie nodded, sitting down beside her. "Yeah, but it’s more than that. I think some of these guys are looking for something easy. They see these Asian girls as less high-maintenance or something. They don’t have to try as hard."
Rachel, always the quieter one, spoke up from the corner of the room. "Or maybe it’s about control. They think Asian women are more submissive and will put up with their crap."
Amy, who had been scrolling through her phone, looked up. "And let’s not forget the cultural stereotypes. They probably think they’re scoring some kind of bonus points for being with an 'exotic' partner."
Sarah, feeling a mix of sadness and frustration, added, "It’s like they want a trophy girlfriend. Someone who looks different enough to make them feel special and progressive, but who also fits into this mold of what they think an ideal partner should be."
Emma sighed. "It’s so frustrating. We’re out here working hard on our careers, our appearances, and our personalities, and it feels like we’re being overlooked for these superficial reasons."
Laura leaned back, swirling her wine. "And the worst part is, it’s not just the hot white guys. Even the white adjacent guys are doing it. Like that Armenian guy with the Chinese girl. She was showing him off like he was some kind of prize."
Sophie added, "It’s like they’re using these relationships to prove something to themselves and the world. That they’re more cultured or open-minded. But it’s all just a facade."
Hannah nodded. "And the irony is, these women probably wouldn’t date an actual ethnic guy unless he looked white enough. It’s all about appearances and fitting into a certain image."
Amy, still scrolling through her phone, said, "I just saw a post on this forum where someone was saying the same thing. These guys want the appearance of being progressive without any of the actual effort."
The conversation continued late into the night, each woman voicing her theories and frustrations. They vented about the unfairness of the dating scene and the societal pressures that seemed to value superficial traits over genuine connection.
As the night wore on, they made a pact to focus on themselves and their own happiness, rather than constantly chasing after men who didn’t see their worth. They decided to support each other more, to lift each other up, and to remind themselves that their value wasn’t determined by the attention they received from men.
Sarah, looking around at her friends, felt a renewed sense of determination. "We deserve better than this. Let’s not let these shallow standards define us. We’re amazing, and we’ll find someone who sees that."
The group agreed, feeling a bit lighter after their discussion. They knew the journey wouldn’t be easy, but they were ready to face it together, with a renewed sense of self-worth and solidarity.
Chapter 3
By the time Sarah and her flatmates reached the age of 33, their experiences and frustrations had only deepened. Their collective body counts had continued to climb as they sought meaningful connections in an increasingly disappointing dating scene. Sarah had slept with 90 men, while her flatmates had similar numbers: Emma with 85, Hannah with 75, Laura with 80, Sophie with 70, Rachel with 65, and Amy with 95.
The toll of their endless search for a meaningful relationship had worn them down. Each woman, despite her best efforts, found herself struggling to maintain hope. Sarah, in particular, felt the weight of her experiences bearing down on her.
Desperation had finally led Sarah to settle for a relationship that she never would have considered in her younger years. She was now dating Mark, a 39-year-old man who was below average in looks. Mark was paunchy, with thinning hair and a kind, if unremarkable, face. He worked a steady job in IT and was reliable, if not particularly exciting.
Sarah and Mark had been dating for a year, and despite her lack of enthusiasm, they had decided to get married. The wedding was approaching, and Sarah found herself feeling more resigned than excited.
One evening, as Sarah and her flatmates gathered for their regular wine and venting session, the conversation turned to Sarah’s impending marriage.
“I still can’t believe you’re getting married, Sarah,” Emma said, sipping her wine. “How are you feeling about it?”
Sarah sighed, twirling her engagement ring around her finger. “Honestly? I’m not sure. I mean, Mark is nice and all, but… I always imagined my wedding day would be different. More exciting.”
Hannah leaned forward, her expression sympathetic. “Do you love him?”
Sarah hesitated. “I care about him. He’s good to me, and I know he’ll be a good husband. But I don’t feel that spark, you know? That excitement I always hoped for.”
Laura, who had recently ended another disappointing fling, nodded. “I get it. But maybe stability and kindness are more important in the long run. We’ve all been through so much, and maybe it’s time to appreciate someone who’s steady and reliable.”
Sophie, ever the pragmatist, chimed in. “You’re right. We’ve been chasing after these idealized versions of men for so long. Maybe it’s time to settle down with someone who actually values us.”
Rachel, who had always been the most introspective of the group, added, “It’s hard to let go of the fantasy. But reality has a way of pushing us towards what’s practical.”
Amy, swirling her glass thoughtfully, said, “I’ve been thinking a lot about that too. Maybe we’ve set our standards based on unrealistic expectations. It’s not settling if you’re choosing stability and companionship.”
Sarah listened to her friends, feeling a mix of sadness and acceptance. “I know you’re right. It’s just hard to let go of that dream. But Mark is a good man, and maybe that’s enough.”
As the evening wore on, the women continued to share their thoughts and fears about the future. They all had high body counts and many regrets, but they also had each other. Despite their disappointments, they found solace in their friendship and the support they provided each other.
The night before her wedding, Sarah sat alone in her room, reflecting on her journey. She knew that marrying Mark was a practical decision, one that would bring her stability and security. But she couldn’t help but feel a pang of sadness for the dreams she had let go of.
The wedding day arrived, and Sarah stood at the altar with Mark, her heart heavy with mixed emotions. As she looked into his kind eyes, she made a silent promise to herself to find contentment in this new chapter of her life, even if it wasn’t the fairy tale she had once imagined.
Her flatmates, all gathered to support her, watched with a mixture of hope and understanding. They knew that life rarely turned out the way they expected, but they also knew that they would face whatever came next together. And that, perhaps, was the most important thing of all.
Chapter 4
Sarah:
Sarah, a 26-year-old university graduate, lived in a crowded flat in central London with six other women. The small space was always filled with chatter, laughter, and the occasional squabble, but it was home. Despite the bustling social life, Sarah felt a gnawing loneliness. She had tried various dating apps—Hinge, Bumble, The League—in an attempt to find a committed relationship with a handsome, successful man. Yet, none of these men seemed interested in more than fleeting connections. Her last serious relationship had ended back in sixth form, leaving her yearning for something deeper and more meaningful.
Sarah had slept with a dozen men, often finding herself in one-night stands with guys who were charming and attractive but unwilling to commit. Each time, she hoped for more, but the competition was fierce, and other women often vied for the same attention.
Frustrated and disillusioned by the London dating scene, Sarah decided to take a bold step. She booked a flight to Barcelona, a city she had always dreamed of visiting. The vibrant culture, stunning architecture, and the promise of new experiences beckoned her. She hoped that a change of scenery might bring the fresh start she desperately needed.
As her departure day approached, Sarah's excitement grew. She packed her bags with a mix of practical clothes and a few dresses for nights out, her heart filled with hope. She couldn't help but wonder if the men in Barcelona would be different, if perhaps she could find someone who saw beyond the surface and wanted to build a future with her.
The morning of her flight, Sarah woke up early, her flatmates still asleep. She quietly slipped out, her suitcase in tow, and headed to the airport. As she boarded the plane, she felt a mixture of nervousness and exhilaration. This trip was more than just a holiday; it was a chance to escape the disappointments of the past and seek something better.
Touching down in Barcelona, Sarah was greeted by the warm Mediterranean air and the lively sounds of the city. She checked into a charming boutique hotel and, after a quick shower, set out to explore. Her phone buzzed with a notification from a dating app. She had set her location to Barcelona before leaving London, curious to see who might be interested in meeting a new arrival.
One message stood out—Javier, a local artist with a profile full of interesting photos and a message that was both charming and inviting. He suggested meeting at a café that evening, promising to show her some of the city's hidden gems. Feeling a spark of excitement, Sarah agreed.
As she prepared for the evening, she couldn't help but feel a sense of hope. Maybe, just maybe, Barcelona would offer her not just adventure, but the meaningful connection she had been searching for. With a final glance in the mirror, she headed out, ready to embrace whatever the night—and the city—had in store for her.
Sarah felt a mix of excitement and nervousness as she walked to the café where she was to meet Javier. The streets of Barcelona were alive with the sounds of evening chatter and the aroma of delicious food. She arrived at the quaint café and saw Javier waiting outside, his dark hair and easy smile instantly recognizable.
"Sarah, it's great to finally meet you," Javier greeted her warmly, giving her a friendly kiss on each cheek.
"Nice to meet you too, Javier," Sarah replied, smiling. "This place looks wonderful."
"It’s one of my favorites," he said as they walked inside and found a cozy corner table. "I thought you might like to try some authentic tapas."
The evening began with light conversation about their backgrounds. Sarah shared stories about her life in London, her struggles with the dating scene, and her love for traveling. Javier talked about his work as an artist, his favorite spots in Barcelona, and his passion for the city’s vibrant culture.
"London sounds amazing," Javier said, leaning forward. "But I can understand why you'd want a change. Barcelona has a way of capturing your heart."
"I hope so," Sarah replied, looking into his eyes. "I’ve always wanted to experience life somewhere different, and I’m really glad I met someone like you to show me around."
They laughed and chatted through several plates of tapas and glasses of wine. Sarah felt a growing connection with Javier, enjoying his charm and the way he seemed genuinely interested in her stories. As the night progressed, he suggested they take a walk to a nearby viewpoint.
The city lights glittered below as they reached the top of a hill. Javier pointed out landmarks and shared tales of the city’s history. They stood close together, the conversation naturally flowing. Javier turned to her, his expression softening.
"You’re really special, Sarah," he said, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "I’m glad we met tonight."
"Me too," Sarah replied, her heart racing.
He leaned in and kissed her gently. She responded, deepening the kiss, feeling a mix of desire and hope. They returned to her hotel, the attraction between them palpable. Once inside her room, their kisses grew more passionate, and they quickly found themselves undressing each other.
They tumbled onto the bed, Javier's hands exploring her body. He was skilled, taking his time to ensure she was comfortable and aroused. They shifted into various positions, ultimately ending with Sarah on top, riding him while they both moaned in pleasure. The connection felt intense and real to her, and she hoped it was the start of something lasting.
The next morning, Sarah woke up to an empty bed. Javier had left a note on the bedside table: "Had to leave early for work. Last night was amazing. Let’s meet again soon. –Javier."
Sarah’s heart sank a bit, but she tried to stay optimistic. Maybe he was genuinely busy. She spent the day exploring the city, trying to keep herself from overthinking. However, as the hours passed, Javier's messages became less frequent and more sporadic.
Days turned into a week, and Sarah realized Javier was not interested in more than just a fleeting romance. She felt a mix of disappointment and frustration. It seemed Barcelona, too, had its share of men who were not looking for anything serious.
Returning to her flat in London, Sarah reflected on her experience. Despite the brief fling with Javier, she cherished the memories of Barcelona. She vowed to keep searching for a genuine connection, holding onto the hope that somewhere, her long-term relationship was waiting.
Feeling disheartened after her experience with Javier in Barcelona, Sarah decided to vent her frustrations on a female travel group she was part of on Facebook. She typed out a long post, detailing her hopes and disappointments, seeking solace and advice from other women who might have faced similar situations. The comments poured in, full of empathy and encouragement. Many suggested that she keep her chin up and continue to seek new adventures. One comment caught her eye: "Have you ever considered Southeast Asia? The culture, the beauty, and the freedom to meet new people can be life-changing."
Inspired by the suggestion, Sarah decided to book a flight to Thailand. The idea of exploring Southeast Asia had always intrigued her, and now seemed like the perfect opportunity. She packed her bags once more, this time with lighter clothes suitable for the tropical climate, and set off with renewed hope.
Landing in Bangkok, Sarah was immediately captivated by the city's vibrant energy. The bustling markets, the rich scents of street food, and the warm, humid air enveloped her. She checked into a cozy hostel known for its social atmosphere, hoping to meet fellow travelers.
That evening, Sarah attended a hostel-organized event, where she mingled with other guests. Among them was Jake, a tall, athletic man with sun-kissed skin and a friendly demeanor. He was a 30-year-old Australian, traveling through Southeast Asia on a break from his finance job. They hit it off instantly, exchanging stories of their travels and their lives back home.
"Thailand is incredible," Jake said, his blue eyes twinkling. "I’ve been here for a few weeks and it just keeps getting better. You should join me tomorrow; I’m planning to explore some islands."
"That sounds amazing," Sarah replied, feeling a spark of excitement. "I’d love to join you."
The next day, they set off early to catch a ferry to a nearby island. They spent the day lounging on pristine beaches, snorkeling in crystal-clear waters, and enjoying the local cuisine. The chemistry between them grew stronger with each passing moment. As the sun set, painting the sky in hues of orange and pink, they found themselves alone on a secluded part of the beach.
Jake looked at Sarah, a soft smile playing on his lips. "This has been an incredible day," he said, his voice low and sincere.
"It really has," Sarah agreed, feeling a flutter in her chest.
They moved closer, their lips meeting in a passionate kiss. The setting felt surreal, like something out of a dream. Jake gently guided her down onto the soft sand, their kisses growing more urgent. He undressed her slowly, savoring each moment, and she did the same, their clothes quickly becoming a forgotten heap beside them.
Jake's hands roamed her body, sending shivers of pleasure through her. He was attentive and tender, making sure she was comfortable and enjoying every second. They shifted into a comfortable position, with Jake on top, moving with a slow, deliberate rhythm. The sound of the waves crashing nearby and the cool evening breeze added to the intensity of the moment.
Sarah wrapped her legs around him, pulling him closer, her moans blending with the sounds of the night. They moved together in perfect harmony, the connection between them undeniable. After they climaxed, Jake rolled to the side, pulling Sarah into his arms. They lay there, basking in the afterglow and the magic of their surroundings.
The next morning, they woke up to the gentle rays of the sun and the distant calls of birds. Jake turned to Sarah, his expression soft and warm. "Last night was incredible," he said, brushing a strand of hair from her face.
"It really was," Sarah replied, feeling a mix of happiness and contentment.
They spent the rest of their time in Thailand exploring together, but as their travel plans eventually diverged, they parted ways with a promise to stay in touch. While it wasn’t the long-term relationship Sarah had hoped for, the experience taught her to embrace the moment and cherish the connections she made along the way.
After her adventure in Thailand, Sarah felt invigorated and decided to continue her journey through Southeast Asia. Her next destination was Bali, an island known for its beautiful beaches, vibrant nightlife, and spiritual retreats. She hoped that Bali would offer her more opportunities to meet interesting people and create unforgettable memories.
Upon arriving in Bali, Sarah checked into a popular hostel in Canggu, an area famous for its surf spots and lively social scene. The hostel was a haven for young travelers, with a communal area that buzzed with energy day and night. Sarah quickly made friends with other guests, many of whom were also solo travelers from various parts of the world.
One evening, as she was lounging by the pool, she struck up a conversation with Tom, a charming Brit in his late twenties. He had a rugged look, with stubble and tousled hair, and he exuded a laid-back vibe that Sarah found appealing.
“Bali is amazing, isn’t it?” Tom said, sipping his beer. “I’ve been here for a week, and I don’t think I ever want to leave.”
“It really is,” Sarah agreed. “There’s something magical about this place. How long are you staying?”
“A couple more weeks, at least. Want to join me for a beach party tonight? I hear it’s going to be epic.”
“Sure, why not?” Sarah smiled, feeling a flutter of excitement.
That night, they danced under the stars at a beach party, the music pumping and the waves crashing nearby. The atmosphere was electric, and Sarah felt alive and carefree. As the night wore on, she and Tom grew closer, their bodies moving in sync with the music. Eventually, they slipped away from the crowd and found a quiet spot on the beach.
They shared a passionate kiss, the chemistry between them undeniable. Soon, their hands were exploring each other’s bodies, the heat between them intensifying. Tom gently laid her down on the sand, their clothes quickly discarded. They made love under the stars, the cool breeze and the sound of the ocean heightening their senses. Tom was attentive and skilled, making sure Sarah was completely satisfied.
The next morning, they woke up in each other’s arms, the sun rising over the horizon. “Last night was incredible,” Tom said, his voice soft and sincere.
“It really was,” Sarah replied, feeling a mix of satisfaction and wistfulness.
Over the next few weeks, Sarah continued to explore Bali, meeting other travelers along the way. She had brief flings with several men, all of them white tourists like herself. There was Chris, an adventurous American with a love for surfing; Lars, a friendly Dutchman who taught her how to ride a scooter; and Marco, an Italian chef who cooked her a delicious dinner before spending the night together.
Each encounter was exciting and fun, but none of them led to anything long-term. While Sarah enjoyed the freedom and thrill of these short-lived romances, she couldn’t help but feel a lingering sense of emptiness. She realized that while she was making amazing memories and connections, she still longed for a deeper, more meaningful relationship.
As her time in Bali came to an end, Sarah reflected on her journey. She had learned a lot about herself and what she wanted in a partner. Although she hadn’t found lasting love, she cherished the experiences and the people she had met along the way. With a renewed sense of purpose, she decided to head back home to London, hopeful that her adventures would continue and that, one day, she would find the meaningful connection she had been searching for.
After her adventures in Bali, Sarah felt a mix of exhilaration and frustration. She still hadn’t found the deep connection she was searching for. Inspired by her previous travels, she decided to try something "a little more exotic" and booked a trip to the Dominican Republic. The island's rich culture, beautiful beaches, and vibrant nightlife called to her, and she hoped it might offer something different.
Upon arriving in Santo Domingo, Sarah was struck by the city's lively atmosphere and the warmth of its people. She checked into a boutique hotel and soon found herself exploring the local scene. However, she quickly noticed that the majority of the men she encountered were black or had mixed heritage. Initially, she felt a bit disheartened as she had hoped to meet more white tourists, but she decided to keep an open mind and embrace the experience.
One evening, at a beach bar, she met Andre, a local with a charismatic personality and a contagious laugh. He had a laid-back demeanor and spoke in a mix of English and Spanish, often slipping into African American Vernacular English (AAVE) when he was relaxed.
"Hey, girl, you new around here?" Andre asked, flashing a charming smile.
"Yeah, just arrived a few days ago," Sarah replied, intrigued by his easy confidence.
"Let me show you how we do it in the DR. You down for some real fun?"
Sarah agreed, and they spent the evening dancing to reggaeton and bachata, the music pulsating through the warm night air. Andre was an excellent dancer, moving with a fluid grace that captivated her. They laughed and chatted, sharing stories and drinks.
As the night wore on, they found themselves walking along the beach, the moon casting a silver glow on the waves. Andre turned to her, his eyes softening. "You know, you got a real nice vibe. I like that."
"Thanks," Sarah replied, feeling a warm flutter in her chest. "I’m having a great time."
He leaned in, and they kissed, the connection immediate and intense. They made their way back to Sarah’s hotel room, the anticipation building. Andre was gentle yet passionate, ensuring Sarah felt comfortable and cherished. Their movements were rhythmic and in sync, a dance of pleasure and connection. The experience was both exhilarating and tender, leaving Sarah breathless.
The next morning, Andre left with a promise to see her again. Over the next few weeks, Sarah continued to meet and connect with local men. She met Carlos, a bartender with a quick wit and a charming smile, and Luis, a tour guide who showed her the hidden gems of the island. Each encounter was unique, filled with laughter, dance, and passionate nights.
Carlos had a smooth and easy-going nature, often speaking in AAVE as they joked and shared stories. "Girl, you crazy," he’d say, laughing as they walked hand-in-hand along the beach. Their nights together were filled with playful teasing and tender moments, Carlos always making sure Sarah was comfortable and satisfied.
Luis, on the other hand, had a more intense demeanor. He was attentive and deeply passionate, his movements deliberate and skilled. "You feelin' good, baby?" he’d whisper, ensuring she was always at ease and enjoying herself.
Despite the wonderful experiences, Sarah still felt a sense of longing for something more permanent. Her time in the Dominican Republic was coming to an end, and while she cherished the memories and connections she had made, she realized that what she truly sought was a lasting relationship.
Returning to London, Sarah felt a mix of gratitude and hope. Her travels had taught her much about herself and what she wanted in a partner. Although she hadn’t found her long-term relationship, she remained optimistic, knowing that her adventures were far from over and that the world was full of possibilities.
Returning to London, Sarah was plagued by a mix of emotions. She had enjoyed her time in the Dominican Republic and the connections she had made, but a nagging feeling of regret and self-judgment lingered. She felt conflicted about her choices, especially as she reflected on her decision to sleep with men who were different from her usual type. Despite the passion and excitement, she couldn’t shake the feeling that she had strayed from her original intentions.
In total, Sarah had slept with twenty-three men. Each encounter, whether fleeting or more meaningful, added to her growing sense of dissatisfaction. She yearned for a deep, committed relationship but found herself continually drawn to the thrill of new experiences, often with men who were not interested in anything long-term.
Sarah's insistence on finding an attractive partner further complicated her search for commitment. She had always set high standards for herself, refusing to settle for anyone she didn't find physically appealing. However, reality struck hard as she realized that these attractive men, often rated well above her own self-perceived 5/10 looks, were not willing to commit. They enjoyed the casual flings and the excitement of her adventurous spirit but ultimately moved on to pursue other options.
One evening, sitting in her small, cluttered flat, Sarah reflected on her journey. She logged onto the same female travel group on Facebook that had previously given her encouragement. She decided to share her feelings honestly, hoping for some clarity and support.
"Hi everyone," she began typing. "I just got back from the Dominican Republic. It was an amazing adventure, but I’m struggling with some mixed feelings. I’ve been on this quest for a meaningful relationship, but I keep finding myself in short-term flings. I’ve slept with 23 men now, and I can't help but feel a bit lost. I also feel kind of ashamed that I went for men outside my usual type. I guess I just needed to vent and maybe get some advice."
The responses came quickly, filled with empathy and understanding. Many women shared their own stories of searching for love and the struggles they faced. Some reminded her that everyone’s journey is unique and encouraged her not to judge herself too harshly. Others suggested focusing on self-love and personal growth rather than constantly seeking validation through relationships.
Inspired by the supportive comments, Sarah decided to take a break from dating. She realized that her worth was not determined by the number of men she had slept with or their attractiveness. She needed to focus on herself, her passions, and her goals.
Over the following months, Sarah threw herself into her work and hobbies. She traveled occasionally but with a different mindset, seeking experiences for personal growth rather than for meeting men. She started volunteering at a local charity, took up painting, and reconnected with old friends. Slowly, she began to feel more confident and content with who she was.
In time, Sarah hoped that by focusing on her own happiness and self-improvement, she might naturally attract the kind of deep, meaningful relationship she had always desired. She learned to embrace her past, understanding that each experience, whether good or bad, had shaped her into the person she was. And with that newfound self-awareness, she looked forward to a future where she could find true, lasting love.
Sarah, still feeling restless and searching for something she couldn’t quite define, decided to take another trip, this time to Cancun. Known for its stunning beaches and vibrant nightlife, Cancun promised adventure and excitement. She hoped that maybe, amidst the sun and the sea, she might find the long-term relationship she craved.
Upon arriving, she checked into an upscale resort famous for its all-inclusive packages and lively social events. It didn’t take long for Sarah to immerse herself in the party scene, mingling with both locals and other tourists. The resort's atmosphere was electric, filled with beautiful people, loud music, and endless opportunities for fun.
One evening, she attended a beach party where the drinks flowed freely, and the energy was high. She met a group of attractive men, a mix of locals and white tourists, who welcomed her into their circle. Among them were Alejandro, a charming Mexican with a killer smile, and Brian, an athletic American with piercing blue eyes.
As the night progressed, the group’s conversation and dancing grew more intimate. There was an unspoken understanding that tonight was about indulgence and pleasure. When the party started to wind down, Alejandro suggested they continue the festivities in his suite. Sarah, fueled by the thrill of the night and her desire for connection, agreed.
In Alejandro’s spacious suite, the mood shifted from playful to seductive. The group of men and women paired off, exploring each other with a mix of curiosity and lust. Sarah found herself caught between Alejandro and Brian, their hands and lips exploring her body with expert precision. The atmosphere was charged with raw, uninhibited energy.
They moved to the bedroom, where the night turned into a blur of passion and pleasure. Sarah experienced an intense, primal connection with both men, their bodies moving in a rhythm that felt both chaotic and perfectly synchronized. They took turns pleasuring her, their touches and movements blending together in a symphony of sensation. The encounters were varied and adventurous, with Alejandro's sensuality and Brian's athletic prowess combining to create an unforgettable experience.
The orgy lasted well into the early hours of the morning, with Sarah finding herself lost in the moment, swept away by the intensity of it all. She felt a fleeting sense of connection with each man, hoping that maybe, amidst this hedonistic experience, she might find someone who wanted more than just a night of passion.
However, as dawn approached and the others began to leave, it became clear that this was just another fleeting encounter. Alejandro kissed her softly and whispered, "You’re amazing, Sarah. I had a great time." Brian echoed similar sentiments, giving her a warm but casual smile before departing.
Left alone in the suite, Sarah felt a wave of emptiness wash over her. The excitement of the night had faded, leaving her with the stark reality that she was once again searching for something more substantial in the wrong places.
She returned to her resort room, physically satisfied but emotionally drained. Lying in bed, she reflected on her journey and the choices she had made. She realized that her pursuit of an ideal relationship through fleeting physical connections was not fulfilling her deeper needs.
Sarah decided it was time for a change. She needed to stop chasing after moments of temporary pleasure and start focusing on building a life that made her happy, regardless of whether it included a partner. She resolved to take a break from her quest for love and instead concentrate on her own personal growth and happiness.
As she packed her bags to return to London, Sarah felt a sense of clarity. Her adventures had taught her valuable lessons about herself and what she truly wanted. With a renewed sense of purpose, she looked forward to creating a future where she was happy and fulfilled on her own terms, and open to love when it came to her naturally.
Chapter 2
At 30 years old, Sarah had reached a point where she was starting to feel the weight of her choices. Over the years, she had continued her pattern of seeking out excitement and connection through countless hookups, both at home and abroad. Her body count had reached 75, a testament to her relentless pursuit of a deeper connection that always seemed just out of reach. Despite a stable white-collar job in London, her frequent travels and lifestyle had plunged her into severe debt. She still lived in the same cramped flat with six other university graduate women who shared similar stories of disappointment and unfulfilled dreams.
Feeling increasingly desperate and depressed about her inability to find a meaningful relationship, Sarah decided to take a drastic step. She created new profiles on various dating apps, but this time, she pretended to be 24. She uploaded photos from her university days, back when she was three dress sizes smaller and full of youthful optimism.
The strategy worked, at least initially. Hot guys began matching with her, lured by her photos and the carefully curated image she presented. They chatted enthusiastically, and many asked her out on dates. Each new match brought a flicker of hope, a chance that this time might be different.
However, the reality was harsh. The first date stood her up, leaving her sitting alone in a trendy bar, her carefully applied makeup and new dress feeling like a cruel joke. The second date showed up but made it clear that he was only interested in one thing. Despite her reservations, Sarah went along, hoping that maybe if she satisfied him physically, he might stick around. But just like before, he disappeared the next morning, leaving her feeling used and more empty than before.
This pattern repeated itself with painful regularity. Every promising conversation turned into a brief fling or a night of empty passion. Each time, the men she met would seem charming and interested, only to reveal their true intentions after they got what they wanted. Sarah felt increasingly disillusioned and bitter, her self-esteem taking a hit with each failed attempt at finding love.
One evening, after yet another disappointing encounter, Sarah found herself back in her flat, staring at her reflection in the mirror. She barely recognized the woman looking back at her. The sparkle in her eyes had dimmed, and the weight of her experiences showed in the lines on her face and the slump of her shoulders.
She logged onto her Facebook group, the one place where she could vent without judgment. "Hi everyone," she typed. "I’m feeling really low tonight. I've tried everything to find a meaningful relationship, but it seems like all the good men are gone. I’m tired of being used and lied to. What am I doing wrong?"
The responses poured in, a mix of sympathy and tough love. Some advised her to focus on herself and her well-being, suggesting she take a break from dating entirely. Others shared similar stories, reminding her she wasn't alone in her struggle.
One comment stood out: "Sarah, maybe it's time to be honest with yourself and others. You're amazing just as you are, but pretending to be someone else won’t bring you real love. Focus on what makes you happy and fulfilled. The right person will come along when you least expect it."
Taking a deep breath, Sarah decided it was time for a change. She deleted the deceptive profiles and vowed to be honest about who she was. She sought help for her debt and began focusing on her health and happiness. Slowly, she started to rebuild her self-esteem, finding joy in her work, hobbies, and friendships.
While the road ahead was uncertain, Sarah felt a renewed sense of hope. She realized that true happiness couldn't be found through others, but from within. And as she worked on loving herself, she held onto the belief that the right person would come into her life when the time was right.
Sarah's flatmates, much like herself, were all in their late twenties to early thirties, each with their own unique stories and struggles. Here are the profiles of the six women she shared her flat with:
- Emma- 29 years old
- Emma works as a marketing executive at a well-known advertising agency in London. With a body count of around 60, she has had her fair share of casual encounters, but she yearns for a committed relationship. Emma is a fitness enthusiast and spends most of her free time at the gym or running in the park. Despite her active lifestyle and outgoing personality, she finds it difficult to get men to commit beyond a few dates.
- Laura- 30 years old
- Laura is a lawyer at a prestigious law firm. Her career is demanding, and she often works long hours, leaving her little time for a social life. She has a body count of 55, accumulated over years of trying to find a balance between work and romance. Laura is known for her sharp wit and intelligence, but she feels that her strong personality intimidates potential partners. She dreams of finding someone who can match her ambition and intellect.
- Hannah- 28 years old
- Hannah is a school teacher who loves working with children. She has a warm and nurturing nature, which makes her popular among her friends and students. With a body count of 45, Hannah has experienced numerous fleeting relationships but none that have lasted. She often finds herself attracted to men who are emotionally unavailable or not ready to settle down. She hopes to meet a man who appreciates her caring nature and wants to build a family.
- Sophie- 31 years old
- Sophie works in public relations and is known for her vibrant social life. She has a body count of 70, having been a regular on the London dating scene for years. Sophie's charismatic personality and love for parties have made her many friends, but she struggles to find a man who wants more than just a good time. She longs for a partner who can see past the party girl facade and appreciate her depth and loyalty.
- Rachel- 29 years old
- Rachel is a software engineer at a tech company. She is the most introverted of the group, preferring quiet nights in with a good book or a movie over going out. With a body count of 50, Rachel has had several casual relationships but nothing that has lasted. She feels that her shyness and reluctance to put herself out there hinder her chances of finding a long-term partner. Rachel hopes to meet someone who shares her interests and values a quieter lifestyle.
- Amy- 30 years old
- Amy is a journalist who writes for a lifestyle magazine. Her career allows her to meet many interesting people, but she often finds herself in relationships that fizzle out quickly. With a body count of 65, Amy has had numerous short-term flings but craves stability and commitment. She is passionate, creative, and loves to travel, but she struggles to find a man who is willing to settle down and share her adventurous spirit.
Sarah and her flatmates were having a leisurely Saturday afternoon together. They decided to head out for brunch at a trendy café in Notting Hill, a favorite spot known for its charming atmosphere and beautiful patrons. As they sat at a table near the window, enjoying their avocado toast and mimosas, a man walked by outside that immediately caught their attention.
He was, by all accounts, breathtaking. He had an exotic, captivating appearance with tan skin that seemed to glow in the sunlight. His eyes were a mesmerizing shade of amber, full of depth and intensity, framed by thick, long lashes that any woman would envy. His brows were perfectly shaped, giving his face a refined yet masculine look. He had full, sensual lips and a strong jawline, complemented by a perfect smile. His hair was thick and styled effortlessly, a touch of natural waves giving it a carefree yet polished look. His body was the epitome of fitness – muscular and well-proportioned, yet not overly bulky, hinting at both strength and agility.
However, what caught their eye even more was the woman beside him. She was a petite, short Chinese woman, delicately beautiful in her own right, but seemingly ordinary compared to the godlike presence of the man. They both wore wedding bands, and the way he looked at her, with genuine affection and adoration, was unmistakable.
Sarah and her flatmates exchanged looks, a mix of shock and resentment clouding their faces. Emma was the first to speak, her voice dripping with disbelief. "Are you kidding me? How does someone like him end up with her?"
Hannah's face twisted with anger. "It's not fair. We put so much effort into looking good, and yet these men go for... that?"
Laura, who had always prided herself on her appearance, especially her bleached hair and meticulous grooming, shook her head. "I mean, look at us. We spend hours grooming, making sure we look perfect. And he’s with her? It’s just... insulting."
Sophie, usually the most diplomatic, couldn't hide her frustration. "I don't get it. We're white, we're beautiful, and we can't even get a decent guy to commit. And then these guys, the really hot ones, end up with these Asian women. It's like, what's the point?"
Rachel, usually more reserved, added quietly, "I see this all the time. The hottest guys with these Asian women. It makes me so angry."
Amy sighed, her expression one of resigned bitterness. "It's like they don't even see us. We bleach our hair, work out, do everything to look perfect, and they go for someone who doesn’t even try."
Their resentment started to morph into an ugly form of racism, their words becoming sharper and more hurtful as they vented their frustrations.
"I swear, I see one more hot white guy with a Japanese or Korean girl, I'm going to lose it," Emma muttered, her face flushed with anger.
"They must have some sort of spell over these guys," Hannah said bitterly. "It’s the only explanation."
As they continued their brunch, the mood had soured significantly. Their conversation turned to their own dating failures, each of them sharing flashbacks of times when they had been passed over for other women, often of Asian descent.
Emma recalled, "Remember that guy I dated last year? He left me for a Korean girl. Said she was 'different.' Whatever that means."
Laura nodded. "I had a guy ghost me and then saw him a week later with a Japanese woman. It's like we don't even stand a chance."
They left the café that day feeling more disheartened and bitter than before. Their envy and frustration had led them down a path of resentment and racism, unable to see past their own prejudices and insecurities. Despite all their efforts to find love and commitment, they found themselves trapped in a cycle of disappointment, unable to understand why their beauty and efforts seemed to go unnoticed by the men they desired most.
As the weeks went by, Sarah and her flatmates' frustration grew. They continued to see attractive white men with Asian women, and it seemed to them that the only men who were interested in them were black or Indian. This only added to their growing resentment, especially for Sarah, who had had numerous hookups with black men in the Dominican Republic. She felt conflicted, battling between her past experiences and her current discontent.
One evening, the flatmates gathered in their living room for a night in, hoping to lift their spirits. Emma, who had just returned from another disappointing date, started the conversation.
"I don’t get it," she said, flopping onto the couch. "Why is it that the only men who seem to be interested in us are black or Indian? Where are all the attractive white men who want to commit?"
Hannah, nodding in agreement, added, "It's like we’re invisible to them. They just don’t see us as relationship material."
Sarah, feeling a knot of frustration in her stomach, chimed in. "I had so many hookups in the Dominican Republic, but none of those men wanted anything more. And now, it feels like I'm stuck in the same pattern here."
Laura leaned forward, her voice tinged with bitterness. "I’m tired of putting so much effort into my appearance and getting nowhere. It's like the only men who approach me are the ones I’m not interested in."
Sophie, who had been scrolling through her dating app, sighed. "Look at this. My matches are almost entirely black or Indian men. Not that there’s anything wrong with them, but why can’t I find a decent white guy who’s interested in more than just a fling?"
Rachel, usually the most reserved, spoke up. "It’s frustrating. We all want the same thing—a long-term relationship with someone who appreciates us. Why is that so hard to find?"
Amy, pouring herself another glass of wine, said, "It feels like we’re being overlooked. We work so hard to look good, to be interesting and fun, but it’s never enough for the men we really want."
Their conversation grew more heated as they vented their frustrations, their words becoming more charged with resentment and anger.
"I just don’t understand why we’re only getting attention from these guys," Emma said, her voice rising. "It’s like we’re not good enough for the attractive white men."
Hannah nodded vigorously. "And it’s not just us. Look around. How many other white women are in the same boat? It’s infuriating."
Sarah, feeling a wave of conflicting emotions, added, "I know I’ve hooked up with black men before, but that was different. I was looking for something real, and it never materialized."
Laura, shaking her head, said, "We deserve better. We deserve men who see our worth and want to commit to us, not just use us for a night."
Their anger and disappointment continued to fester, leading them to develop a deep-seated resentment not just towards the men they desired, but also towards those who seemed to effortlessly attract their attention.
One evening, while watching a romantic movie, they saw yet another scene featuring a beautiful couple. The man was a handsome, white model-type, and the woman was Asian.
"Of course," Sophie scoffed. "It’s everywhere. It’s like a slap in the face."
Emma turned to the group, her face flushed with anger. "I’m so tired of this. We deserve love and commitment just as much as anyone else."
Their shared experiences and mutual frustrations only seemed to deepen their bonds, but also their prejudices. They found themselves caught in a vicious cycle of longing and resentment, struggling to find the love and validation they so desperately sought.
Sarah and her flatmates, feeling the sting of their recent dating failures, decided to embark on a mission to find the perfect men. They spent their weekends in various parts of London, from high-end Mayfair bars to trendy spots in Shoreditch, hoping to meet the elusive "6'5 trust fund blue eyes" type. However, reality hit hard as they observed the couples around them, realizing that the men they desired were often with either East Asian/hapa women or model-tier white/white adjacent women.
Couple 1:
- Man: Tall, around 6'3", British, extremely attractive with chiseled features, piercing blue eyes, and dirty blonde hair.
- Woman: Petite, Japanese, average looks with a plain face, short hair, and minimal makeup.
- Man: Around 5'10", French, attractive with dark brown hair, hazel eyes, and a well-groomed beard.
- Woman: Tall, Chinese, slightly below average looks with a round face, glasses, and a shy demeanor.
- Man: 6'1", Swedish, model-tier with a strong jawline, light blonde hair, and striking green eyes.
- Woman: Korean, attractive with flawless skin, long black hair, and stylish clothes.
- Man: 5'9", American, white, good-looking with brown hair, blue eyes, and a charming smile.
- Woman: Taiwanese, average looks, cute but not striking, with shoulder-length hair and a casual outfit.
- Man: 6'2", Australian, white adjacent (Lebanese descent), very handsome with olive skin, dark curly hair, and brown eyes.
- Woman: Singaporean, pretty with delicate features, long straight hair, and fashionable clothes.
- Man: 6'4", German, extremely attractive with blond hair, blue eyes, and a well-built physique.
- Woman: Vietnamese, average looks, with a round face, long hair, and a sweet smile.
- Man: 5'11", Italian, attractive with dark brown eyes, olive skin, and curly black hair.
- Woman: Model-tier white adjacent (Brazilian), stunning with tan skin, brown eyes, and a perfect figure.
- Man: 6'0", Dutch, very attractive with light brown hair, green eyes, and a muscular build.
- Woman: Hapa (half Japanese, half white), pretty with a unique blend of features, and a confident attitude.
- Man: 6'3", British, white, incredibly handsome with dark hair, blue eyes, and sharp features.
- Woman: Korean, average looks, with straight hair, a slim build, and understated style.
- Man: 6'1", American, white adjacent (Mexican descent), attractive with tan skin, black hair, and warm brown eyes.
- Woman: Singaporean, below average looks, with a plain face, and casual attire, but exuding confidence as she clung to his arm.
Couple 11:
- Man: 6'2", Armenian, white adjacent, very attractive with a strong jawline, dark hair, and piercing grey eyes.
- Woman: Chinese, below average looks, with round glasses, and a plain outfit, but visibly proud and clingy.
Hannah sighed, rolling her eyes. "Why do these women always go for guys who aren't even their ethnicity if they're going to show off like that? Such hypocrites."
Laura shook her head, a mix of annoyance and frustration on her face. "It’s so cringe. They won't date actual men from their own ethnic background unless they look white enough. It’s ridiculous."
Sarah couldn’t help but feel a pang of anger and jealousy. She had worked so hard on her appearance, put so much effort into trying to find a meaningful relationship, and yet here she was, watching the men she dreamed of being with, happily paired with women who seemed to get everything she wanted so effortlessly.
As they continued their hunt around London, the reality of their situation became clearer. The men they desired were often already taken by women who, in their eyes, seemed less deserving. It left them feeling more frustrated and disheartened than ever. The night ended with the flatmates returning home, their spirits dampened, and their resolve tested, each of them silently wondering what it would take to find the love they so desperately sought.
The atmosphere in the upscale Mayfair bar was buzzing with energy, but Sarah and her flatmates were simmering with frustration. They watched as two couples, particularly conspicuous in their behavior, seemed to be flaunting their relationships in a way that grated on the group of white women.
Couple 1:
- Man: 6'2", Armenian, white adjacent, very attractive with dark hair, piercing grey eyes, and a fit body.
- Woman: Chinese, below average looks, with round glasses, and a plain outfit, but visibly proud and clingy.
- Man: 6'1", Brazilian, white adjacent, very attractive with tanned skin, brown hair, and green eyes.
- Woman: Korean, average looks, with long straight hair, dressed in trendy, woke-chic style.
The Armenian man, smiling indulgently, nodded. "Yeah, it’s great that we found each other. Our backgrounds just blend so perfectly."
Emma, overhearing this, muttered under her breath, "Oh please, she’s only with him because he looks white."
Hannah, equally annoyed, added, "And she’s making sure everyone knows it. So transparent."
The second couple, the Korean woman and her Brazilian boyfriend, were similarly engaged in a public display of their 'wokeness.' "I love my Latino man," the Korean woman said, her voice dripping with performative pride. "Brazilians have such a vibrant culture, and it's amazing to be with someone who appreciates diversity as much as I do."
Her boyfriend, tanned and muscular, kissed her on the cheek. "You’re right, babe. It’s all about understanding and appreciating each other's backgrounds."
Laura, unable to contain her irritation, whispered to her friends, "She’s probably never even looked twice at an actual Asian guy. But she’s so woke because she’s dating someone who’s mixed."
Sophie, sipping her drink more aggressively than usual, agreed. "It’s so hypocritical. They act all superior and enlightened, but they only go for men who look white enough to fit their standards."
The Korean woman, noticing the group of white women, turned slightly and spoke louder. "Isn’t it wonderful to be with someone who’s so open-minded? I feel sorry for people who can’t appreciate the beauty of multicultural relationships."
Sarah, feeling a surge of anger, leaned closer to her friends. "They’re just doing this to make us feel bad. It’s not about being multicultural, it’s about showing off that they can get these men."
Emma nodded. "Exactly. They’re pretending to be so progressive, but it's clear they only want men who look white. It’s so fake."
The Chinese woman, now speaking directly to her Armenian boyfriend but loud enough for the surrounding tables to hear, continued. "I’ve always been drawn to men with rich cultural backgrounds. I can’t imagine being with someone who isn’t as open-minded as you."
The Armenian man, somewhat oblivious to the tension he was causing, responded warmly. "I feel the same way, love. We’re so lucky to have found each other."
The blatant displays of 'wokeness' and the transparent attempts to flaunt their relationships only deepened the resentment among Sarah and her friends. The evening, which had begun with a hopeful search for meaningful connections, ended in a bitter reflection on their own perceived inadequacies and the societal pressures they felt were stacked against them.
As they left the bar, Emma voiced what they were all thinking. "We need to stop focusing on these superficial standards and find someone who truly values us for who we are."
Hannah sighed. "Easier said than done. But you’re right. We deserve better than this constant competition and these fake woke displays."
Sarah, feeling a mix of determination and resignation, nodded. "Let’s just focus on ourselves for now. Maybe if we stop looking so hard, the right person will come along."
With that, the group resolved to support each other more and to look beyond the superficialities that had plagued their dating lives. The journey ahead was uncertain, but they hoped it would lead to more genuine and fulfilling connections.
As Sarah and her flatmates made their way back to their flat, their frustration boiled over into a heated discussion. They couldn’t stop talking about the couples they had seen, especially the hot white men with the Asian women who, in their eyes, seemed less attractive.
"Seriously, what is going on?" Emma fumed as she unlocked the door to their flat. "Why are all these hot white guys either with other model-tier white women or these dumpy-looking Asian girls?"
Hannah threw her bag onto the couch and sank into a chair. "I don’t get it either. It’s like, what do they see in them? I mean, no offense, but we put so much effort into looking good, and it feels like we’re invisible to them."
Laura poured herself a glass of wine and took a deep sip. "I’ve been thinking about this a lot. Maybe it’s some kind of exotic fetish thing. Like, they think they’re being all worldly and progressive by dating outside their race."
Sophie nodded, sitting down beside her. "Yeah, but it’s more than that. I think some of these guys are looking for something easy. They see these Asian girls as less high-maintenance or something. They don’t have to try as hard."
Rachel, always the quieter one, spoke up from the corner of the room. "Or maybe it’s about control. They think Asian women are more submissive and will put up with their crap."
Amy, who had been scrolling through her phone, looked up. "And let’s not forget the cultural stereotypes. They probably think they’re scoring some kind of bonus points for being with an 'exotic' partner."
Sarah, feeling a mix of sadness and frustration, added, "It’s like they want a trophy girlfriend. Someone who looks different enough to make them feel special and progressive, but who also fits into this mold of what they think an ideal partner should be."
Emma sighed. "It’s so frustrating. We’re out here working hard on our careers, our appearances, and our personalities, and it feels like we’re being overlooked for these superficial reasons."
Laura leaned back, swirling her wine. "And the worst part is, it’s not just the hot white guys. Even the white adjacent guys are doing it. Like that Armenian guy with the Chinese girl. She was showing him off like he was some kind of prize."
Sophie added, "It’s like they’re using these relationships to prove something to themselves and the world. That they’re more cultured or open-minded. But it’s all just a facade."
Hannah nodded. "And the irony is, these women probably wouldn’t date an actual ethnic guy unless he looked white enough. It’s all about appearances and fitting into a certain image."
Amy, still scrolling through her phone, said, "I just saw a post on this forum where someone was saying the same thing. These guys want the appearance of being progressive without any of the actual effort."
The conversation continued late into the night, each woman voicing her theories and frustrations. They vented about the unfairness of the dating scene and the societal pressures that seemed to value superficial traits over genuine connection.
As the night wore on, they made a pact to focus on themselves and their own happiness, rather than constantly chasing after men who didn’t see their worth. They decided to support each other more, to lift each other up, and to remind themselves that their value wasn’t determined by the attention they received from men.
Sarah, looking around at her friends, felt a renewed sense of determination. "We deserve better than this. Let’s not let these shallow standards define us. We’re amazing, and we’ll find someone who sees that."
The group agreed, feeling a bit lighter after their discussion. They knew the journey wouldn’t be easy, but they were ready to face it together, with a renewed sense of self-worth and solidarity.
Chapter 3
By the time Sarah and her flatmates reached the age of 33, their experiences and frustrations had only deepened. Their collective body counts had continued to climb as they sought meaningful connections in an increasingly disappointing dating scene. Sarah had slept with 90 men, while her flatmates had similar numbers: Emma with 85, Hannah with 75, Laura with 80, Sophie with 70, Rachel with 65, and Amy with 95.
The toll of their endless search for a meaningful relationship had worn them down. Each woman, despite her best efforts, found herself struggling to maintain hope. Sarah, in particular, felt the weight of her experiences bearing down on her.
Desperation had finally led Sarah to settle for a relationship that she never would have considered in her younger years. She was now dating Mark, a 39-year-old man who was below average in looks. Mark was paunchy, with thinning hair and a kind, if unremarkable, face. He worked a steady job in IT and was reliable, if not particularly exciting.
Sarah and Mark had been dating for a year, and despite her lack of enthusiasm, they had decided to get married. The wedding was approaching, and Sarah found herself feeling more resigned than excited.
One evening, as Sarah and her flatmates gathered for their regular wine and venting session, the conversation turned to Sarah’s impending marriage.
“I still can’t believe you’re getting married, Sarah,” Emma said, sipping her wine. “How are you feeling about it?”
Sarah sighed, twirling her engagement ring around her finger. “Honestly? I’m not sure. I mean, Mark is nice and all, but… I always imagined my wedding day would be different. More exciting.”
Hannah leaned forward, her expression sympathetic. “Do you love him?”
Sarah hesitated. “I care about him. He’s good to me, and I know he’ll be a good husband. But I don’t feel that spark, you know? That excitement I always hoped for.”
Laura, who had recently ended another disappointing fling, nodded. “I get it. But maybe stability and kindness are more important in the long run. We’ve all been through so much, and maybe it’s time to appreciate someone who’s steady and reliable.”
Sophie, ever the pragmatist, chimed in. “You’re right. We’ve been chasing after these idealized versions of men for so long. Maybe it’s time to settle down with someone who actually values us.”
Rachel, who had always been the most introspective of the group, added, “It’s hard to let go of the fantasy. But reality has a way of pushing us towards what’s practical.”
Amy, swirling her glass thoughtfully, said, “I’ve been thinking a lot about that too. Maybe we’ve set our standards based on unrealistic expectations. It’s not settling if you’re choosing stability and companionship.”
Sarah listened to her friends, feeling a mix of sadness and acceptance. “I know you’re right. It’s just hard to let go of that dream. But Mark is a good man, and maybe that’s enough.”
As the evening wore on, the women continued to share their thoughts and fears about the future. They all had high body counts and many regrets, but they also had each other. Despite their disappointments, they found solace in their friendship and the support they provided each other.
The night before her wedding, Sarah sat alone in her room, reflecting on her journey. She knew that marrying Mark was a practical decision, one that would bring her stability and security. But she couldn’t help but feel a pang of sadness for the dreams she had let go of.
The wedding day arrived, and Sarah stood at the altar with Mark, her heart heavy with mixed emotions. As she looked into his kind eyes, she made a silent promise to herself to find contentment in this new chapter of her life, even if it wasn’t the fairy tale she had once imagined.
Her flatmates, all gathered to support her, watched with a mixture of hope and understanding. They knew that life rarely turned out the way they expected, but they also knew that they would face whatever came next together. And that, perhaps, was the most important thing of all.
Chapter 4
Epilogue: The Women in Their Early 40s
A decade had passed since Sarah and her flatmates navigated the tumultuous dating scene of their 30s. Life had taken each of them on different paths, and their outcomes were as varied as their personalities.Sarah:
- Body Count: 92
- Outcome: Sarah married Mark, the reliable yet unremarkable IT professional. Their marriage was stable but lacked passion. They had one child, conceived through IVF after struggling with infertility. Sarah often reflected on her choices but found solace in her role as a mother and the stability Mark provided. They lived a quiet life in the suburbs, and Sarah had come to appreciate the predictability of her life, even if it wasn't the fairy tale she once dreamed of.
- Body Count: 88
- Outcome: Emma remained single, focusing on her career as a marketing executive. She had her eggs frozen at 38 and decided to have a child via a sperm donor at 41. She was a devoted single mother and found fulfillment in her career and her child. Despite occasional loneliness, she was content with her choices and the independence she maintained.
- Body Count: 78
- Outcome: Hannah eventually married an Indian man named Raj, who she met through mutual friends. He was a kind, patient engineer who adored her. They had two children together. Hannah found happiness in the family life she had longed for, and her earlier frustrations seemed like a distant memory. They lived in a cozy home in a family-friendly neighborhood.
- Body Count: 82
- Outcome: Laura also remained single but chose a different path. She adopted a child from China when she was 39, providing a loving home to a little girl. Laura’s legal career flourished, and she balanced her professional and personal life with grace. She found fulfillment in motherhood and her career, creating a supportive network of friends and family around her.
- Body Count: 72
- Outcome: Sophie married a divorced man named Peter, who had two children from his previous marriage. Peter was a kind and steady presence in her life, and Sophie embraced the role of stepmother wholeheartedly. They decided not to have more children, focusing instead on creating a blended family filled with love and support. Sophie found joy in the unexpected turns her life had taken.
- Body Count: 68
- Outcome: Rachel married Michael, a fellow software engineer she met at a tech conference. Michael was not conventionally attractive but shared Rachel’s interests and values. They had one child together, conceived via IVF after several attempts. Rachel continued to work in tech, balancing her career with her family life. She found happiness in her intellectual and emotional connection with Michael.
- Body Count: 100
- Outcome: Amy remained single and childless by choice. She traveled extensively and wrote a successful blog about her adventures and life experiences. Amy had a few long-term relationships over the years but never settled down. She was content with her decision to live life on her own terms, finding fulfillment in her independence and the freedom to pursue her passions.
Reflection
As they navigated their 40s, each woman came to terms with the paths they had chosen. They continued to support each other, their bond as strong as ever. While their lives had not turned out exactly as they had envisioned in their youth, they found contentment and fulfillment in the choices they made and the lives they built. The friendship they shared remained a constant source of strength and comfort, proving that, no matter where life took them, they were never truly alone.
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