fishinthesee
Iron
- Joined
- Jun 16, 2025
- Posts
- 210
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- 153
As I grow older (17 and a senior in HS) I realize how much harder making new friends is, I am already ND and socially shy, I can talk fine and communicate good but I have found making new friends has been a struggle since about sophomore year.
The FOIDS i talk to are unironically easier to communicate with than the men, they understand the feeling i want and genuinely care about looks more than men due to my problem not being looks, its personality, I am not even that autistic but covid combined with my general personality + neurodivergence made me a pretty unsocial person.
Most people say if you look good your personality it doesn't matter but this is so far from the truth, I am White HMTN, average/slightly above average height compared to people around me, and no one approaches me that much, people definitely do and I will admit compared to other people way more than others but its just because of my physical appearance, deep down inside covid + being fat + late puberty genuinely raped me socially, I recovered so much social skills and am "fine" now but I want more
The only people I can connect with are people who literally know me like that, they've seen it all or a big portion of my life, a lot of those people I fell out with or they climbed the social ladder so much they couldnt GAF about me, theyre still chill around me but wouldn't go out of their way to invite me and I would really have to larp right now in order to fit in with them, I "mog" some of them but why does it matter now if they get more foids have a better friendgroup or whatever and are NT, literally nothing beats that even LMTNS beat me in terms of lifemog
I will admit I am lucky asf, I still have a couple friends who I do know like that and they are very relatable we share a lot in common music taste wtv, one of them is like a childhood friend from age 5 so yeah make of that as you will we are close like THAT
Anyways onto the teen friendship pill shit I feel like past freshman year friendships just gets different, people do drugs almost every guy who is socially active has fucked or at least fingered a foid people just have NT interests as fuck. All the relationships you make are purely transactional and I know even before you think they are too but back then even chopped asf people could be friends with you its less competitive to make friends and friendgroups, and even people who are "losers" have friends. If you aren't caught up to social person by age 15/16 then its very hard to catch up, you can and its possible I think I can but its just brutal seeing downtown people laughing with their 8 person group while I am alone w one friend, everyone around us just has nothing in common, I know my life is probably still at least average and better than most people on here but holy shit I could be so much better if I just had an early puberty and no mental health issues.
All of this matters because once you're off to uni or wherever you go the way ur personality and shit developed bc of the way people treated you impacts you a lot, still less than in early puberty / late childhood but it really does, imagine you die and no one knew you in highschool and only your family remember you, truly brutal, I have literally talked to more women than men the last year I swear to fucking god No one is relatable its probably my fault but I am going to do every little fucking thing possible without stressing myself out n just having fun in order to have a normal end to my highschool career
People will say oh in modern dating just look good after highschool the social ladder is gone and youll be fine and thats good for ONS/fucking foids but that is boring if you just want that, I want to have kids w a good looking woman and its hard to find those on dating apps JFL It doesnt matter people still have a social ladder everywhere u go in online circles stores everywhere and they can tell by the way u speak and wtv. Part of me wishes it was truly all looks but it isnt, maybe for the top 5% it is but I dont think it should be, I have sympathy for every sub 5 and facially challenged individuals because I understand their loneliness
This post isnt even about trust its just about social status and how hard it is to climb the social ladder / make friends after a certain point, And I know its truly possible to have really close friends even after highschool at like 19 or 20 still but I could never trust someone I met after that age more than someone I met in elementary school even if we had BEEF back then or got into fights together. The stuff you bond over after youre in the workforce is so unpure, its not even you, the only part they see of you is your looks and status and it makes almost every friendship purely transactional, whereas opposed to in your childhood you are actively at recess playing sports doing other shit in class drawing your personality is basically on full display, obviously looks matter still as much as they do after but it really is brutal. Even doing drugs and bonding over that w people in your teen years is better than 99% of shit youll "bond" over with adults when you are in ur 20s
I genuinely dk how to give this thread a tldr but pretty much
during highschool social ladder more competitive
personality matters asf socially and if you grew up ugly during puberty your personality is gonna be impacted
the friends you make become faker and faker as hs goes on
brutal thing is these friends are still 1000% realer than anyone u meet after early university
making friends at young age is very crucial and i lowk fucked up bc of my neurodivergence
The FOIDS i talk to are unironically easier to communicate with than the men, they understand the feeling i want and genuinely care about looks more than men due to my problem not being looks, its personality, I am not even that autistic but covid combined with my general personality + neurodivergence made me a pretty unsocial person.
Most people say if you look good your personality it doesn't matter but this is so far from the truth, I am White HMTN, average/slightly above average height compared to people around me, and no one approaches me that much, people definitely do and I will admit compared to other people way more than others but its just because of my physical appearance, deep down inside covid + being fat + late puberty genuinely raped me socially, I recovered so much social skills and am "fine" now but I want more
The only people I can connect with are people who literally know me like that, they've seen it all or a big portion of my life, a lot of those people I fell out with or they climbed the social ladder so much they couldnt GAF about me, theyre still chill around me but wouldn't go out of their way to invite me and I would really have to larp right now in order to fit in with them, I "mog" some of them but why does it matter now if they get more foids have a better friendgroup or whatever and are NT, literally nothing beats that even LMTNS beat me in terms of lifemog
I will admit I am lucky asf, I still have a couple friends who I do know like that and they are very relatable we share a lot in common music taste wtv, one of them is like a childhood friend from age 5 so yeah make of that as you will we are close like THAT
Anyways onto the teen friendship pill shit I feel like past freshman year friendships just gets different, people do drugs almost every guy who is socially active has fucked or at least fingered a foid people just have NT interests as fuck. All the relationships you make are purely transactional and I know even before you think they are too but back then even chopped asf people could be friends with you its less competitive to make friends and friendgroups, and even people who are "losers" have friends. If you aren't caught up to social person by age 15/16 then its very hard to catch up, you can and its possible I think I can but its just brutal seeing downtown people laughing with their 8 person group while I am alone w one friend, everyone around us just has nothing in common, I know my life is probably still at least average and better than most people on here but holy shit I could be so much better if I just had an early puberty and no mental health issues.
All of this matters because once you're off to uni or wherever you go the way ur personality and shit developed bc of the way people treated you impacts you a lot, still less than in early puberty / late childhood but it really does, imagine you die and no one knew you in highschool and only your family remember you, truly brutal, I have literally talked to more women than men the last year I swear to fucking god No one is relatable its probably my fault but I am going to do every little fucking thing possible without stressing myself out n just having fun in order to have a normal end to my highschool career
People will say oh in modern dating just look good after highschool the social ladder is gone and youll be fine and thats good for ONS/fucking foids but that is boring if you just want that, I want to have kids w a good looking woman and its hard to find those on dating apps JFL
It doesnt matter people still have a social ladder everywhere u go in online circles stores everywhere and they can tell by the way u speak and wtv. Part of me wishes it was truly all looks but it isnt, maybe for the top 5% it is but I dont think it should be, I have sympathy for every sub 5 and facially challenged individuals because I understand their lonelinessThis post isnt even about trust its just about social status and how hard it is to climb the social ladder / make friends after a certain point, And I know its truly possible to have really close friends even after highschool at like 19 or 20 still but I could never trust someone I met after that age more than someone I met in elementary school even if we had BEEF back then or got into fights together. The stuff you bond over after youre in the workforce is so unpure, its not even you, the only part they see of you is your looks and status and it makes almost every friendship purely transactional, whereas opposed to in your childhood you are actively at recess playing sports doing other shit in class drawing your personality is basically on full display, obviously looks matter still as much as they do after but it really is brutal. Even doing drugs and bonding over that w people in your teen years is better than 99% of shit youll "bond" over with adults when you are in ur 20s
I genuinely dk how to give this thread a tldr but pretty much
during highschool social ladder more competitive
personality matters asf socially and if you grew up ugly during puberty your personality is gonna be impacted
the friends you make become faker and faker as hs goes on
brutal thing is these friends are still 1000% realer than anyone u meet after early university
making friends at young age is very crucial and i lowk fucked up bc of my neurodivergence
