the one time i tried the gym… and almost never came back

[gasstationcart]

so my cousin keeps telling me i gotta “get my life right” and try the gym. i finally give in and pull up with him last sunday.
i’m wearing my black nike tech, hood up


we start on the treadmills. i’m trying to look like i know what i’m doing, so i crank it up to 10. two minutes in i realize i made a huge mistake.
sweat’s pouring, my chest feels like it’s on fire, and my hood’s flying back like a cape.
i reach for the stop button, hit it too hard, and stumble so bad i almost get thrown off.


whole gym looks over. some girl starts laughing, and i try to play it cool like, “nah just warming up.”


then i try the bench press. cousin sets up the bar, i get under it, start pushing — and completely forget to put the clips on the weights.
as soon as i tilt a little, the plates slide off, crash to the ground, and the trainer comes sprinting over.
he looks furious but just says, “bro, maybe start with dumbbells.”


i left after that, pretending i had somewhere to be. haven’t stepped back in since.