Apparition
Aimless Spirit
- Joined
- Jul 30, 2024
- Posts
- 774
- Reputation
- 753
Isn’t because I’m scared of rejection. I’m not scared of being hurt because there isn’t much a girl can do to me at this point.
It’s because if i meet a girl and i don’t like her as a person, it just makes me reminisce my oneitis. And in saying this because it happened several times. For example, had gone out with a girl in January and she was so retarded and it was impossible to communicate with her because of a difference in sentience. After meeting her I felt so empty and got depressed because I couldn’t see my oneitis again.
I don’t like thinking about her rly. Because I was never worthy of her she was too good on so many levels that’s it’s crazy. And she hurt me a lot. She showed all this concern and support for me, all turned out to be fake. Just an act to keep me hooked and lead me on.
She would encourage me to practice bass and pursue my goals, I told her I would go for running and she supported me in that as well. We would talk about every day stuff and I thought that I had finally found a person that understands me and cares about me. And then she was gone, she got what she wanted from me and had no reason to speak to me ever again. Everything was fake, everything. And I never found a girl I could share these things with again.
Because the girls that followed her not only ghosted me but were also 10x colder and more distanced than she was. They would take forever to reply, had a stupid stuck up personality when we met and insufferable to be around in general. It just didnt work. And the more I tried, the worse it just got. Sometimes I wish that maybe if my oneitis was uglier maybe if she was fat I’d have worked with her but then again, if she wasn’t good looking she wouldn’t be the same person. Good genes come in packages sadly.
It’s because if i meet a girl and i don’t like her as a person, it just makes me reminisce my oneitis. And in saying this because it happened several times. For example, had gone out with a girl in January and she was so retarded and it was impossible to communicate with her because of a difference in sentience. After meeting her I felt so empty and got depressed because I couldn’t see my oneitis again.
I don’t like thinking about her rly. Because I was never worthy of her she was too good on so many levels that’s it’s crazy. And she hurt me a lot. She showed all this concern and support for me, all turned out to be fake. Just an act to keep me hooked and lead me on.
She would encourage me to practice bass and pursue my goals, I told her I would go for running and she supported me in that as well. We would talk about every day stuff and I thought that I had finally found a person that understands me and cares about me. And then she was gone, she got what she wanted from me and had no reason to speak to me ever again. Everything was fake, everything. And I never found a girl I could share these things with again.
Because the girls that followed her not only ghosted me but were also 10x colder and more distanced than she was. They would take forever to reply, had a stupid stuck up personality when we met and insufferable to be around in general. It just didnt work. And the more I tried, the worse it just got. Sometimes I wish that maybe if my oneitis was uglier maybe if she was fat I’d have worked with her but then again, if she wasn’t good looking she wouldn’t be the same person. Good genes come in packages sadly.
