What do i need to do to become likable

[plotkun]

im a narc spergy neet. How pretty must I be to make up 4 it? What do I need to fix?

 

[ronald_2]

You just need to become attractive. Thats all.

You arent ugly btw.

 

[RealNinja]

You have to learn to take a genuine interest in other people and their lives, or at least learn how to fake it by asking them thoughtful questions about themselves. You must realize that everyone is truly unique, even the most normie of normies has their own inner richness and different thoughts/experiences.

You also have to learn how to empathize or fake empathizing by mirroring their body language and relating to them emotionally (if someone tells you their grandfather died, you demonstrate empathy by frowning, lowering your tone and mood. If someone tells you they got promoted you do it by smiling and becoming more upbeat.)

If you have a tendency towards being negative, try to be more positive and lighthearted when interacting with others. This is something I’ve had to work on a lot. I’m not even necessarily “pessimistic,” but since I was little I’ve had a dry/dark sense of humor and always found irony/sarcasm funny. Which can be unappealing to a lot of people.

 

[actualunderstander]

Have a baseline of confidence, even if it's not that high or faked (different than arrogance), find activities to do you like that other people like, get into a lot of conversations, and like that other guy said, take actual interest in other people. It may feel self sacrificing for a bit cause other people tend not to be interested in others themselves, but that's why a likeable person is somewhat rare and different than someone who people only like cause of narcissistic appeal or ego.

Also be assertive. Not aggressive. People don't like those who are too easy to push over socially. Speak your mind, believe it or not. Doesn't mean you have to be an opinionated asshole, but don't make yourself "invisible" too much. To achieve this, you will have to have a baseline of confidence or else you will be scared to not be "invisible"

 

[Stewart]

You just need to become attractive. Thats all.

You arent ugly btw.

You can be liked if you are ugly - you can be hated if you're good looking

 

[lovemaxer]

You have to learn to take a genuine interest in other people and their lives, or at least learn how to fake it by asking them thoughtful questions about themselves. You must realize that everyone is truly unique, even the most normie of normies has their own inner richness and different thoughts/experiences.

You also have to learn how to empathize or fake empathizing by mirroring their body language and relating to them emotionally (if someone tells you their grandfather died, you demonstrate empathy by frowning, lowering your tone and mood. If someone tells you they got promoted you do it by smiling and becoming more upbeat.)

If you have a tendency towards being negative, try to be more positive and lighthearted when interacting with others. This is something I’ve had to work on a lot. I’m not even necessarily “pessimistic,” but since I was little I’ve had a dry/dark sense of humor and always found irony/sarcasm funny. Which can be unappealing to a lot of people.

fuuuuck the problem with my autism is if i dislike someone i can't hide it at all. the best i can do is stop myself from calling them a complete cunt or backhanded insults and slightly walk them back

 

[ronald_2]

You can be liked if you are ugly - you can be hated if you're good looking

Hated by people of your own sex, of course. But who cares about that.

 

[Stewart]

Hated by people of your own sex, of course. But who cares about that.

Honestly its pretty important, having a solid social circle with people of your own gender will take you far in life

If you just autistically hyper-focus on women you will kinda fuck yourself over and give girls the ICK if you have no friends etc

Its about an important balance and if you disregard anything you're kinda cucking yourself

 

[fluoride1337]

im a narc spergy neet. How pretty must I be to make up 4 it? What do I need to fix?

When it comes to any social interaction, frame is law- I'll come back to this later.

Every interaction has an equal amount of verbal and nonverbal signals that are being exchanged.

As far as nonverbal goes, your facial/speech mannerisms, having inflection in your voice, and good eye contact with intermittent breaks are 90% of it.



Just make sure you don't have any of the same mannerisms as this guy.

As far as actually talking to people, people like talking about what interests them (water), so asking them questions that provoke something more than a yes or no answer will keep the conversation going and build rapport (water). Also, don't fraud any interests, because it is easy to get caught and it will ruin their perception of you.

An example of a normie conversation that I've gone through dozens of times, is them talking about football.

I don't have any interest in football and never watch it. So my go to when people ask me what my favorite team is always something like "I don't really keep up with football, but I used to go to (my college's team) games when I was in school. I am more of a combat sports guy (truth), do you watch UFC?". This will honestly be one the most common conversations you have with normies at work, and I go to that every time. If I just said "I don't watch any sports" they would think I'm a fag, nerd, antisocial, etc. And the conversation would die. But since I watch something that either they watch, or have friends who watch, it is an acceptable answer. If I had lied, and gotten caught, I would be breaking frame, and the guy would think I'm a brown nosing pussy for lying about liking football to impress ANOTHER GUY.

When it comes to foids, they will probably have different interests, but the strategy is mostly the same. Say you're getting to know one, and they say something like "I'm really into astrology (jfl)"

Now you obviously don't give a shit, but you can at least feign some curiosity and interest by asking a few questions. Since you don't give a shit or know anything about astrology, just pretend like the topic is like an actual interesting topic you would want to know more about.

"I hear some girls say they have one sign, but others talk about multiple signs, how does that work?"
"Why are some signs considered more compatible than others?"

When she yaps and gives you an answer don't say something like "OMG that's so heckin awesome!!". You are a straight male and she knows this, there is very little chance you would care that much about astrology, her stupid nonprofit job, her weekend getting plugged in Bali, etc. Women can pick up on fake interest better than guys can. And this is why you maintain frame. This doesn't mean you do the opposite and give some disinterested reply, just simply acknowledge what she said, and get her to expand more or try to segue into talking about something else.

Remember that NT and foids especially spend most of their waking hours yapping, so all the gay little tricks that come from bullshit like the 48 laws of power will just make you look like a dark triad larper (one of the "laws" from that book is to say the person's name as much as you can, and I literally saw a foid tiktok the other day making fun of guys who do this )

 

[Soter]

im a narc spergy neet. How pretty must I be to make up 4 it? What do I need to fix?

in addition to what others have said, find out what non-NT behaviors that you do repulses people and change them

 

[MagicalWaves]

im a narc spergy neet. How pretty must I be to make up 4 it? What do I need to fix?

grow ur hair out and goatee and youll be set man and orobably getting lean

 

[rgvmogger07]

im a narc spergy neet. How pretty must I be to make up 4 it? What do I need to fix?

grow out your hair please

 

[aecoq]

Smile.

 

[floopmaxxed]

fuuuuck the problem with my autism is if i dislike someone i can't hide it at all. the best i can do is stop myself from calling them a complete cunt or backhanded insults and slightly walk them back

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