Where did it all go wrong?

[Graham]

Spoiler: Mood

I was playing a Roblox game where you need to make a team and compete against trials, and some guys invited me over to join their squad (4 per squad).

They seemed to know each other to some capacity (just online friends I assume), but they seems so happy, constant back and forth banter (I didn't get involved as I figured they'd be much younger), but they liked me because I was carrying them most of the time. The camaraderie they had seemed so wholesome.

Then one of them asked how old we all were.

"13"
"17"
"15"

Then me.

"23"

"Lol yeah right"
"sureee"
"why would an adult be playing roblox?"

I responded with "I wish I wasn't", then we got back to playing the game. After a couple more trials the squad disbanded and we went our separate ways.

In that moment, I realized I hadn't witnessed that kind of close friendship in years, and that I'm getting so old now.

It really hit home that they thought I was so old I couldn't be enjoying Roblox - because that's exactly what I used to think when I was 13 and came across older players. I thought after school, I'd be enjoying going out with my friends, have a girlfriend, have different "more mature" hobbies, and that Roblox would just be a relic of my past.

Yet here I am.

I guess in a few years time all that'll be left of me are Autistic ramblings on Looksmax.