Xangsane
Miss Hone!
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Assignment: Choose a country to research and perform a presentation on it.
Patty
Presented on Japan, highlighting its rich culture, technological innovation, and blend of tradition and modernity.
Leslie
Focused on Brazil’s natural beauty, diverse culture, and global impact, including its passion for soccer.
Helene
Gave a controversial presentation on India, emphasizing negative stereotypes and sanitation issues, including open defecation and the use of cow dung, while making derogatory comparisons between Bollywood stars and Western beauty standards, which provoked discomfort among her classmates.
Patty
Presented on Japan, highlighting its rich culture, technological innovation, and blend of tradition and modernity.
Patty went first, confidently walking to the front of the class with her presentation on Japan. Her slides were filled with vibrant images of cherry blossoms, bustling cities, and traditional Japanese temples.
Patty: “Japan is an island nation in East Asia, known for its rich culture, technological innovation, and beautiful landscapes. The capital, Tokyo, is one of the largest cities in the world and is famous for its skyscrapers, shopping, and food.”
Patty’s presentation was informative and visually appealing, covering everything from Japan’s history to its modern pop culture. She talked about the importance of Shinto and Buddhism, Japan’s love for anime, and even the country’s culinary delights like sushi and ramen.
The class listened attentively, nodding along as Patty described Japan’s unique blend of tradition and modernity. It was a solid presentation that everyone seemed to appreciate.
Patty: “Japan is an island nation in East Asia, known for its rich culture, technological innovation, and beautiful landscapes. The capital, Tokyo, is one of the largest cities in the world and is famous for its skyscrapers, shopping, and food.”
Patty’s presentation was informative and visually appealing, covering everything from Japan’s history to its modern pop culture. She talked about the importance of Shinto and Buddhism, Japan’s love for anime, and even the country’s culinary delights like sushi and ramen.
The class listened attentively, nodding along as Patty described Japan’s unique blend of tradition and modernity. It was a solid presentation that everyone seemed to appreciate.
Leslie
Focused on Brazil’s natural beauty, diverse culture, and global impact, including its passion for soccer.
Next up was Leslie, who had chosen Brazil. Her presentation was filled with images of the Amazon Rainforest, Rio de Janeiro, and famous Brazilian landmarks like Christ the Redeemer.
Leslie: “Brazil is the largest country in South America and is known for its diverse culture, beautiful beaches, and the Amazon Rainforest, which is the largest tropical rainforest in the world. Brazil is also famous for its Carnival festival, a massive celebration with music, dancing, and colorful costumes.”
Leslie’s presentation was just as engaging as Patty’s, with a focus on Brazil’s natural beauty, its vibrant culture, and its role as a global leader in coffee production. She also touched on Brazil’s love for soccer, mentioning legendary players like Pelé and Neymar.
The class enjoyed learning about Brazil’s rich culture and diverse ecosystems, and Leslie’s presentation was well-received.
Leslie: “Brazil is the largest country in South America and is known for its diverse culture, beautiful beaches, and the Amazon Rainforest, which is the largest tropical rainforest in the world. Brazil is also famous for its Carnival festival, a massive celebration with music, dancing, and colorful costumes.”
Leslie’s presentation was just as engaging as Patty’s, with a focus on Brazil’s natural beauty, its vibrant culture, and its role as a global leader in coffee production. She also touched on Brazil’s love for soccer, mentioning legendary players like Pelé and Neymar.
The class enjoyed learning about Brazil’s rich culture and diverse ecosystems, and Leslie’s presentation was well-received.
Helene
Gave a controversial presentation on India, emphasizing negative stereotypes and sanitation issues, including open defecation and the use of cow dung, while making derogatory comparisons between Bollywood stars and Western beauty standards, which provoked discomfort among her classmates.
Finally, it was Helene’s turn.
As she clicked to her first slide, the title alone caused a mix of anticipation and mild dread among her classmates:
Helene: “India: The Land of Cow Dung, Open Defecation, and PSL-5 Faces”
Slide 1: The Geography and the Ganges
Helene’s first slide featured a detailed map of India, overlaid with what looked like a heat map of cow population density.
Helene: “India is located in South Asia and is the seventh-largest country by land area. But more importantly, it has the Ganges River, which is considered holy and is, unfortunately, filled with all kinds of filth, including cow dung and human waste. Speaking of which…”
She clicked to the next slide, which displayed an image of an Indian man squatting on the side of a street.
Helene: “Open defecation is a huge problem in India. Despite efforts to improve sanitation, a significant portion of the population still defecates in the open. It’s not uncommon to see scenes like this one all across the country. And you know what that means? It’s hard to walk down the street without stepping in something!”
A few students stifled their laughter, while others looked around uncomfortably. Mrs. Keller’s eyes widened in alarm, but she let Helene continue, hoping things would improve.
Slide 2: The Culture of India—According to Helene
The next slide featured a mishmash of images—Bollywood stars, traditional dancers, and of course, cows.
Helene: “India has a rich culture, but what stands out to me is Bollywood. Did you know that many Bollywood stars are considered super attractive in India? But if you put them on the PSL scale, they barely make it to PSL 5. I mean, look at this guy—he’s supposed to be a heartthrob, but compared to Western models, he’s average at best!”
She clicked to an image of a famous Bollywood actor, rated “PSL 3.2” in bold letters next to his face.
Helene: “Now, if we compare this to Jon-Erik Hexum, who was a solid PSL 8, it’s clear that Indian standards are way different. Also, fun fact—India’s cultural obsession with cows has led to them roaming the streets freely, which contributes to the sanitation issues I mentioned earlier. Cows are everywhere!”
Slide 3: India’s Economy and Cow Dung
Helene then switched to a slide filled with charts and images of rural India.
Helene: “India is one of the fastest-growing economies in the world, but it still struggles with extreme poverty. A significant portion of the population relies on agriculture, and cow dung is used as fertilizer. That’s right—cow dung is a big part of the economy. They even dry it out and use it as fuel for cooking. Imagine making your dinner over a fire fueled by cow patties!”
The image on the slide showed an Indian woman cooking over a fire with stacks of dried cow dung in the background. The class was now a mix of stifled giggles and outright disbelief at what they were hearing.
Slide 4: India’s Role in Global Technology—and Weird Phrases
Next up was a slide featuring India’s contributions to the tech world.
Helene: “India is also known as the hub of global IT services. Many of the people who answer tech support calls are from India. But have you ever heard them say things like ‘bobs and vegana’? It’s a weird phrase that became popular after some Indians misunderstood a meme! And then there’s the whole thing with people asking for ‘bobs’ online, which is just… I mean, come on. It’s another example of how different the culture is!”
She clicked to an image of a stereotypical Indian man with the phrase “Send bobs” in comic sans font, leaving the class in a state of barely contained laughter.
Slide 5: The NOAA Map of Feces Concentration
Helene: “As you can see from this map, most of the world’s feces concentration in the oceans is concentrated in the Indian Ocean. This data is sourced from NOAA, who obviously didn’t intend for their map to be used this way, but it’s clear that the Indian Ocean is the world leader in oceanic fecal matter.”
The slide displayed an official-looking map, which she had somehow managed to alter using an image editor. The map showed global feces concentrations in the oceans, with a heavy emphasis on the Indian Ocean, marked in deep shades of brown.
Slide 6: Conclusion—Why India is a Land of PSL 5 Faces and Cow Dung
Helene wrapped up her presentation with a slide that summarized her key points.
Helene: “In conclusion, India is a fascinating country with a rich culture, but it’s also a place where cows roam the streets, people poop in public, and Bollywood stars are barely PSL 5s. It’s a land of contrasts, and that’s what makes it so interesting to study. But let’s be honest—if you want real beauty, you’ve got to look elsewhere. Maybe at someone like Jon-Erik Hexum, am I right?”
As she clicked to her first slide, the title alone caused a mix of anticipation and mild dread among her classmates:
Helene: “India: The Land of Cow Dung, Open Defecation, and PSL-5 Faces”
Slide 1: The Geography and the Ganges
Helene’s first slide featured a detailed map of India, overlaid with what looked like a heat map of cow population density.
Helene: “India is located in South Asia and is the seventh-largest country by land area. But more importantly, it has the Ganges River, which is considered holy and is, unfortunately, filled with all kinds of filth, including cow dung and human waste. Speaking of which…”
She clicked to the next slide, which displayed an image of an Indian man squatting on the side of a street.
Helene: “Open defecation is a huge problem in India. Despite efforts to improve sanitation, a significant portion of the population still defecates in the open. It’s not uncommon to see scenes like this one all across the country. And you know what that means? It’s hard to walk down the street without stepping in something!”
A few students stifled their laughter, while others looked around uncomfortably. Mrs. Keller’s eyes widened in alarm, but she let Helene continue, hoping things would improve.
Slide 2: The Culture of India—According to Helene
The next slide featured a mishmash of images—Bollywood stars, traditional dancers, and of course, cows.
Helene: “India has a rich culture, but what stands out to me is Bollywood. Did you know that many Bollywood stars are considered super attractive in India? But if you put them on the PSL scale, they barely make it to PSL 5. I mean, look at this guy—he’s supposed to be a heartthrob, but compared to Western models, he’s average at best!”
She clicked to an image of a famous Bollywood actor, rated “PSL 3.2” in bold letters next to his face.
Helene: “Now, if we compare this to Jon-Erik Hexum, who was a solid PSL 8, it’s clear that Indian standards are way different. Also, fun fact—India’s cultural obsession with cows has led to them roaming the streets freely, which contributes to the sanitation issues I mentioned earlier. Cows are everywhere!”
Slide 3: India’s Economy and Cow Dung
Helene then switched to a slide filled with charts and images of rural India.
Helene: “India is one of the fastest-growing economies in the world, but it still struggles with extreme poverty. A significant portion of the population relies on agriculture, and cow dung is used as fertilizer. That’s right—cow dung is a big part of the economy. They even dry it out and use it as fuel for cooking. Imagine making your dinner over a fire fueled by cow patties!”
The image on the slide showed an Indian woman cooking over a fire with stacks of dried cow dung in the background. The class was now a mix of stifled giggles and outright disbelief at what they were hearing.
Slide 4: India’s Role in Global Technology—and Weird Phrases
Next up was a slide featuring India’s contributions to the tech world.
Helene: “India is also known as the hub of global IT services. Many of the people who answer tech support calls are from India. But have you ever heard them say things like ‘bobs and vegana’? It’s a weird phrase that became popular after some Indians misunderstood a meme! And then there’s the whole thing with people asking for ‘bobs’ online, which is just… I mean, come on. It’s another example of how different the culture is!”
She clicked to an image of a stereotypical Indian man with the phrase “Send bobs” in comic sans font, leaving the class in a state of barely contained laughter.
Slide 5: The NOAA Map of Feces Concentration
Helene: “As you can see from this map, most of the world’s feces concentration in the oceans is concentrated in the Indian Ocean. This data is sourced from NOAA, who obviously didn’t intend for their map to be used this way, but it’s clear that the Indian Ocean is the world leader in oceanic fecal matter.”
The slide displayed an official-looking map, which she had somehow managed to alter using an image editor. The map showed global feces concentrations in the oceans, with a heavy emphasis on the Indian Ocean, marked in deep shades of brown.
Slide 6: Conclusion—Why India is a Land of PSL 5 Faces and Cow Dung
Helene wrapped up her presentation with a slide that summarized her key points.
Helene: “In conclusion, India is a fascinating country with a rich culture, but it’s also a place where cows roam the streets, people poop in public, and Bollywood stars are barely PSL 5s. It’s a land of contrasts, and that’s what makes it so interesting to study. But let’s be honest—if you want real beauty, you’ve got to look elsewhere. Maybe at someone like Jon-Erik Hexum, am I right?”
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