why cant my mother see past the surface of me?

[Nutsack2000]

my urge to do something extreme due to my mental state only builds and I don't understand why my mother cant see that.

I mean, do I have to fucking spell it out? do I have to shout at her, telling her that I'm obviously not ok?
maybe she just assumes its just me being a teen but that still doesn't make sense.

I have left SO many signs that I'm not doing well and its so blatantly obvious too.

she knows I'm not social at all, I don't do anything productive when I get home, I don't take care of myself at all, hell, shes seen that I have been on incel forums!
I've even tried making the scars on my forearms obvious but whatever.

I cant just blame her entirely though as this is really just my fault for not telling her but it still hurts how blind she is.

there are way more things that I've done but this is just like something to get out there

tldr: I should get a therapist or something

 

[Bryce]

I mean, do I have to fucking spell it out? do I have to shout at her, telling her that I'm obviously not ok?

Obviously you do. Cutting yourself like a mental patient isn't going to solve anything. Baffles me that people genuinely do this.

 

[Nutsack2000]

Obviously you do. Cutting yourself like a mental patient isn't going to solve anything. Baffles me that people genuinely do this.

I don't don't it as often as others honestly so not something I can really bitch about

I just wanted physical proof that I'm not doing well.

 

[Bryce]

I don't don't it as often as others honestly so not something I can really bitch about

I just wanted physical proof that I'm not doing well.

That's twisted logic. You're only digging yourself a deeper hole. Therapy isn't cheap and unless you've got a diagnosis for a condition insurance won't cover it. Your mom isn't ignorant, she grew up in a completely different time and is probably just negligent because yes it simply does not make sense to her. You best think beyond yourself every once and a while. Either tell her or don't but don't be sad when something bad happens because it's up to you.

 

[Nutsack2000]

That's twisted logic. You're only digging yourself a deeper hole. Therapy isn't cheap and unless you've got a diagnosis for a condition insurance won't cover it. Your mom isn't ignorant, she grew up in a completely different time and is probably just negligent because yes it simply does not make sense to her. You best think beyond yourself every once and a while. Either tell her or don't but don't be sad when something bad happens because it's up to you.

I know I'm being a selfish ass but I just can't bring myself to talk about it, or really any right moments to bring it up.

I feel like if I ever do talk about it and solve whatever's going on, I'll just feel worse about it

what's that one thing called? the feeling of being attracted to your sadness? maybe its that

been like this for too long and now its the only emotion that feels real

 

[Bryce]

what's that one thing called? the feeling of being attracted to your sadness?

That's called mental illness.

I know I'm being a selfish ass but I just can't bring myself to talk about it, or really any right moments to bring it up.

I know the feeling of not knowing when a decent time to say it is but if it's as bad as you claim I fail to see how it could get any worse.

 

[Nutsack2000]

That's called mental illness.

I know the feeling of not knowing when a decent time to say it is but if it's as bad as you claim I fail to see how it could get any worse.

even if I did talk about it, I doubt she would understand me

shes gone through her fair share of bad stuff and I know it, but its no where near the same situation I have

but I mean its better to tell her than to kill myself I guess

 

[browncurrycel]

I'm in the same situation with a mother who doesn't understand shit about me, but just know that therapy will not since anything.

It's just going to be a complete waste of time and money. Your mental state will not improve unless your actual situation in life improves

 

[Nutsack2000]

I'm in the same situation with a mother who doesn't understand shit about me, but just know that therapy will not since anything.

It's just going to be a complete waste of time and money. Your mental state will not improve unless your actual situation in life improves

brooootal

it Is what it is I guess