ElySioNs
Mercenary
- Joined
- Feb 7, 2021
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No word of a lie she (36f) just said that shit to me (39m)
We've been together for 9 years and are currently on a much anticipated vacation. She was terribly irritable with me all day yesterday. So I give her some space. Then she snaps at me when I ask her where she put the snacks...that she packed. Irritated I even asked. She wanted me to figure it out.
So instead of apologizing or owning up to her attitude, she doubles down on it telling me in the reason she's cranky and irritable. Well, I reflected on it...and I just can't come up with why. Usually I'm pretty self aware and I know if I've done something wrong or snapped or got short. But...asking where something is? Sure that might annoy her because she's always answering those questions at home with the kids. But shit we're on vacation and she packed that stuff. What is the harm in asking?
So, I can see she's irritated. I give her some space. Honestly, I shouldn't have to suffer that cranky attitude. So I watch a movie and stay out of her way.
Well, that was the wrong thing to do because she was mad that I "ignored" her. Ok then. So she leaves the apartment this morning without telling me she left. Without telling me where she was going. So about 45 mins go by and I head out too. I go looking in a couple places that we talked about visiting, and she's not there. Yes, I could have messaged her at any time up to this point. But I didn't. I figured if she wanted me to know where she was, she would have told me.
So I arrive at this bar we had talked about visiting. She's not there. I order a beer. Her temper should not be my burden to bear. I message her and let her know where I am.
First she tells me she's cutting our trip short. Then she's mad at me I went somewhere without her...then she's mad at me that I didn't apologize for making her cranky.
So I make my way back to the apartment and she's not there. I ask her to come back, and offer that we can still go out somewhere together or do something. She refuses....in vulgar terms.
She eventually comes back and tells me I'm the problem. Well, I generally try hard to validate her feelings but I can't bring myself to do it this time. I feel like she's being unreasonable here.
So she got all dressed up and told me she's going to the bar. I asked her if she wanted me to come with her. She said no. She informed me she might go cheat on me or suck a dick at least and that I could have stopped her.
Now she left. I'm sitting here by myself. I'm not happy about things but I don't have any guilt over this.
I have spent time working on myself, including therapy so I can be a better person for her. But I feel like it's never enough and when she gets in one of these moods, there's nothing I can say or do.
I hope your collective Saturday nights are going better than mine.
So I guess what I want to know is...am I a goddamn psycopath because I don't think I've done anything to justify her actions?
I welcome all comments and opinions, especially those that challenge me.
EDIT: she came back. Told me to take responsibility. When I disagreed with her she hit me in the face.
We've been together for 9 years and are currently on a much anticipated vacation. She was terribly irritable with me all day yesterday. So I give her some space. Then she snaps at me when I ask her where she put the snacks...that she packed. Irritated I even asked. She wanted me to figure it out.
So instead of apologizing or owning up to her attitude, she doubles down on it telling me in the reason she's cranky and irritable. Well, I reflected on it...and I just can't come up with why. Usually I'm pretty self aware and I know if I've done something wrong or snapped or got short. But...asking where something is? Sure that might annoy her because she's always answering those questions at home with the kids. But shit we're on vacation and she packed that stuff. What is the harm in asking?
So, I can see she's irritated. I give her some space. Honestly, I shouldn't have to suffer that cranky attitude. So I watch a movie and stay out of her way.
Well, that was the wrong thing to do because she was mad that I "ignored" her. Ok then. So she leaves the apartment this morning without telling me she left. Without telling me where she was going. So about 45 mins go by and I head out too. I go looking in a couple places that we talked about visiting, and she's not there. Yes, I could have messaged her at any time up to this point. But I didn't. I figured if she wanted me to know where she was, she would have told me.
So I arrive at this bar we had talked about visiting. She's not there. I order a beer. Her temper should not be my burden to bear. I message her and let her know where I am.
First she tells me she's cutting our trip short. Then she's mad at me I went somewhere without her...then she's mad at me that I didn't apologize for making her cranky.
So I make my way back to the apartment and she's not there. I ask her to come back, and offer that we can still go out somewhere together or do something. She refuses....in vulgar terms.
She eventually comes back and tells me I'm the problem. Well, I generally try hard to validate her feelings but I can't bring myself to do it this time. I feel like she's being unreasonable here.
So she got all dressed up and told me she's going to the bar. I asked her if she wanted me to come with her. She said no. She informed me she might go cheat on me or suck a dick at least and that I could have stopped her.
Now she left. I'm sitting here by myself. I'm not happy about things but I don't have any guilt over this.
I have spent time working on myself, including therapy so I can be a better person for her. But I feel like it's never enough and when she gets in one of these moods, there's nothing I can say or do.
I hope your collective Saturday nights are going better than mine.
So I guess what I want to know is...am I a goddamn psycopath because I don't think I've done anything to justify her actions?
I welcome all comments and opinions, especially those that challenge me.
EDIT: she came back. Told me to take responsibility. When I disagreed with her she hit me in the face.
