Working hard and feeling gl are inversely correlated

[New Poster]

Whenever I buckle down and actually try to work, I feel increasingly aspie and ugly. It's like your brain can only hold one kind of self esteem at a time. If I work, then my value becomes work, achievement, effort, etc. It's harder to view myself as a tall chadlite. I need to fuck off for a good hour before I can feel gl again.