ABSOLUTE STATE OF MY MOM - HOW I ALMOST LOST MY TORTOISE

Deleted member 8576

Deleted member 8576

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Today my mom left my 1 year old desert tortoise outside in our backyard so she could get some sun. These little guys are cold blooded obviously so they need plenty of warmth and heat to grow and not die, so this in and of itself was not a stupid idea. But here's where my mom fucking fucked up.

1. It's warm enough in our house where she is so doing this is not necessary
2. It's hotter than the girl in @Toth's thot 's avi outside so in other words you could cook your own fucking nutsack on the goddamn pavement
3.
MY MOM FORGOT SHE LEFT HER OUT THERE FOR TWO FUCKING HOURS AND LOST HER

HOW THE FUCK DO YOU FORGET? MY MOM PUT HER OUT THERE AND JUST WENT BACK INSIDE AND HOPPED ON THE COMPUTER AND GODDAMN FORGOT MY TORTOISE WAS OUT THERE. I MEAN, WE FEED HER EVERY DAY, HOW COULD YOU FORGET? AND YOU"RE SUPPOSED TO WATCH OVER HER WTFFFFF


mom came to me like 20 minutes ago and told me that she left her outside and now DOESN'T KNOW WHERE SHE IS, AND THAT ITS BEEN TWO HOURS. i almost went ER (in titanfall 2) right then and there, and her, me, and some friends in the neighborhood came and looked for her. my backyard is big and there's lots of rocks everywhere and she's a little fucking tortoise, so looking for her was a nightmare, we look for what feels like forever.

right before i was about to walk into my house and start destroying EVERYTHING, neighbor who came to help us look for her FINDS her under a rock. the dopamine rush is unreal and we thank him. thank jesus/mohammad

tl;dr for the dn rd faggots: my mom left my tortoise outside and forgot about her for two fuckin hours, LOST her, and neighbors helped find her.

@Lev Peshkov @Toth's thot @inceletto @Britishlooksmaxxer @malignant @wasted @Ritalincel @alexjones @sytyl @anyone who might give a shit
 
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6997 1
 
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0
 
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Stop being such a brat. I could understand your reaction, if her intent would've been malicious, but she just tried to be helpful.
 
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Stop being such a brat. I could understand your reaction, if her intent would've been malicious, but she just tried to be helpful.
true but it doesn't need to be outside and it's really fuckin hot out jfl
 
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I love tortoise
 
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lol
i lost my fucking turtle once in my garden like 5 years ago
ive never found it
 
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If only it was a snapping turtle and could bite your moms finger as retribution
 
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WHO THE FUCK OWNS A TORTOISE

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
 
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It saw its chance and made a run crawl for it. It is attempting to fulfill its biological imperative to breed. Of course it does not know there are no other tortoises within miles.
 
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@anyone who might give a shit


so why am i here?
 
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biggest nerd kid have tortoise ngl
 
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happy you found the tortoise bro, your moms a dumbass for that
 
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turtle-pepe-the-frog-9gag-know-your-meme-turtle-png-clip-art.png
 
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Jfl

Been inside 2 pussies
Congratz. Your mothers (like everyone) and another one. So your slaycount is 1. Depending on ur age that's borderline inceldom unless you've fucked that 1 pussy many many times.

What's your age turtle dude?
 
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Congratz. Your mothers (like everyone) and another one. So your slaycount is 1. Depending on ur age that's borderline inceldom.

What's your age turtle dude?
16, 3 pussies in that case jfl, also gotten head and been tossed off on seperste occasions if they are slays

Owning a tortoise being a eugene bro
 
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Stop being such a brat. I could understand your reaction, if her intent would've been malicious, but she just tried to be helpful.
She almost killed his pet
 
I have a pair of turtoises living on my backyard, i have a bucket full of water for them to bathe. I don't even know how they feed themselves, but they seem to be living the life, sunbathing, swimming in and out, they probably do some wild fucking when im not watching too.
 
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U lost franklin?


giphy.gif
 
can i see ur tortoise
 
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Today my mom left my 1 year old desert tortoise outside in our backyard so she could get some sun. These little guys are cold blooded obviously so they need plenty of warmth and heat to grow and not die, so this in and of itself was not a stupid idea. But here's where my mom fucking fucked up.

1. It's warm enough in our house where she is so doing this is not necessary
2. It's hotter than the girl in @Toth's thot 's avi outside so in other words you could cook your own fucking nutsack on the goddamn pavement
3.
MY MOM FORGOT SHE LEFT HER OUT THERE FOR TWO FUCKING HOURS AND LOST HER

HOW THE FUCK DO YOU FORGET? MY MOM PUT HER OUT THERE AND JUST WENT BACK INSIDE AND HOPPED ON THE COMPUTER AND GODDAMN FORGOT MY TORTOISE WAS OUT THERE. I MEAN, WE FEED HER EVERY DAY, HOW COULD YOU FORGET? AND YOU"RE SUPPOSED TO WATCH OVER HER WTFFFFF


mom came to me like 20 minutes ago and told me that she left her outside and now DOESN'T KNOW WHERE SHE IS, AND THAT ITS BEEN TWO HOURS. i almost went ER (in titanfall 2) right then and there, and her, me, and some friends in the neighborhood came and looked for her. my backyard is big and there's lots of rocks everywhere and she's a little fucking tortoise, so looking for her was a nightmare, we look for what feels like forever.

right before i was about to walk into my house and start destroying EVERYTHING, neighbor who came to help us look for her FINDS her under a rock. the dopamine rush is unreal and we thank him. thank jesus/mohammad

tl;dr for the dn rd faggots: my mom left my tortoise outside and forgot about her for two fuckin hours, LOST her, and neighbors helped find her.

@Lev Peshkov @Toth's thot @inceletto @Britishlooksmaxxer @malignant @wasted @Ritalincel @alexjones @sytyl @anyone who might give a shit
glad you found her
what made u wanna get a moving rock as a pet
 
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Women are literally the meme gender
 
tortoises me
 
thank you
 
:rage: Rage
 
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