AITA for making fun of my partner's hair loss?

Deleted member 19642

Deleted member 19642

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Title sounds bad I know. This has been an ongoing argument between my partner and I for almost 6 months now. I feel like I'll never hear the end of it.

Back story, I (23f) am a naturally fair skinned girl. I'm also cursed with pretty dark body hairs which makes upkeep a complete pain. I shave my legs and two days later I have dark prickles of hair that I can't shave again for 1.5 weeks or so without causing some pretty painful razer burn. It is something that has bothered me for a long time, as it takes away alot of my freedom in the warmer seasons and I have to pick and choose what events I can show my legs at.

This year I was invited to go to with my (28m) partner to his families Christmas Day lunch, which I was pretty excited for! A few days before the lunch, my partner and I were also invited to a New Year's Day pool party at his friends place. (Southern Hemisphere for anyone confused here!) Of course this filled me with dread, because I knew that by this point my legs would look freaking terrible in a swimsuit. I decided to go to both, and found a gorgeous Summer Maxi Dress to wear for New Years Day. I thought I'd just relax by the pool on the banana lounge, and also help the host organise the BBQ lunch.

After the lunch I was laying out with a few of the other ladies, while our partners were all mucking about in the pool doing cannon-balls. My friends partner, (25m) asked why I wasn't swimming, and I let him know I just wasn't feeling like it that day and I'd rather lay in the shade. At this point my partner got back out of the pool, and I assumed he was going to jump back in like usual. Instead, he came over to me, lifted up the bottom of my dress revealing my legs and exclaimed "She isn't swimming today cause she is as hairy as a fucking bear!" I grabbed my dress and pulled it back down quite embarrassed, and shot him a very angry look. There was a few chuckles but mostly awkward silence. I was MORTIFIED. He knows how self conscious I am about this.

In my anger I then bit back and said "Maybe we can transplant some of my leg hair to that nice bald patch you've been brewing?!" This was also met with a few chuckles followed by even more awkward silence. My partner then stormed off from the pool and went inside to get dry. He got changed into his dry clothes and came out and said that we're leaving. I felt really bad, especially for the hosts so I apologised to them and said they could keep my salad bowls I had bought over.

My partner and I have never spoken about his hair-loss before. When I said this I did know that it likely bothered him being that I found photos on his phone of him taking pictures of the top of his head (where the hair loss has started) I just felt it was hypocritical that he could create that whole situation, and my insecurity wasn't off limits but his is? I know I didn't handle myself the best here. AITA?

EDIT: Wow this seriously blew up! Thanks to all of the lovely women who took the time to leave some tips or open up to me in the DMs! I couldn't fit this in the post but I just had my 4th laser hair removal session and my legs are already remotely hairless! I have a few sporadic patches where I still get really thin hair, and some hair follicles still haven't dropped. I have 6 sessions left so I would have to say it's a successful story!

In regards to my partner, I'm going to try and have an open conversation with him one more time. My intention is to either communicate and clear the air, or I will be leaving him. I won't be telling him that second part obviously lol. Not sure if I should show this to him yet.


UPDATE:

Update for everyone. I sat him down when we both finished work and he came over just a little over an hour ago. It was a very short conversation..

I started the conversation by stating that I would like to clear the air and resentment in the relationship. His response to this was "Are you going to finally apologise?" I just about died inside. I asked him what I should be apologising for, and he said the comments I made about his hair at the New Years party. I then suggested that perhaps we should apologise in sequence of events so he should go first lmao.

He said that there is no way he is apologising me after what I said because I crossed a line. I asked him what about him crossing the line with my boundaries and humiliating me? He said it isn't the same because I could of just shaved it off and be done with it, where as his situation *could* be permanent. I said that my situation would of remained permanent if I didn't do something about it. He then went quiet and started to shut down telling me he doesn't want to talk. I told him I don't want his company if he can't have an adult open conversation with me. He left. I will be dumping him tomorrow. I didn't sign adoption papers. I never wanted this man-baby.
 
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Reactions: Hades, ballskin, Richard_Hungwell and 1 other person
:lul::lul::lul:
 
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Reactions: Hades, Richard_Hungwell and Deleted member 19642
She burned that low confidence beta really good. Tbh becoming visibly insulted and butthurt when someone comments negatively about your physical features is extremely pathetic (especially if you made fun of someone first).
 
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Reactions: Hades, closedplatecel, Truecel14 and 6 others
insecure faggot pointed out someone's flaw and can't take the same in the face

hate people like that
 
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Reactions: Hades, closedplatecel, Deleted member 18694 and 6 others
This is the kind of exciting drama we have to look forward to when we finally ascend, boyos! :soy:

On a more serious note, isn't it a bad idea to get laser hair removal? Hair grooming is like clothing/fashion trends...they change over time. What if legbeards become fashionable on women in the future and then she can't grow out her leg hair because she laser'd it off?
 
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Reactions: Jarate

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