karmacitathugmaxx
BULKING 4 SUMMER CREW | (15/06) BMI 23.7 BF% 13.6
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NOTE: This thread is dedicated to @Newday*V3 because he’s always hating on my fucking grindset every time I bring it up. Idrc if all the greys DNR this one because this is primarily being made to send to all my opps
My favourite scene in TV history is Gohan going SSJ in the time chamber. I first watched this on the small screen over 20 years ago, I must have been 5 or 6 years old.
Gohan goes SSJ for the first time [720p HD]
Maybe this scene just hits extra hard for me because I’ve always been a fucking disappointment, but the central message has stuck with me ever since…
In other words, sometimes raw willpower just isn’t enough to get the job done without an impetus of necessity.
In the realm of psychology, there are four known ways to prevent yourself from acting on an unwelcome recurring impulse. In order of difficulty:
I. Suppression - Actively trying to prevent the impulse from recurring and/or pretending it isn't there.
II. Sublimation - Locking in on a separate desire that is more acceptable or accessible.
III. Relegation - Placing your unwelcome impulse below a separate incompatible desire in your hierarchy of needs.
IV. Elimination - Figuring out which mental constructs or pathways are responsible for the impulse and inactivating them (through rewiring/blocking/excising/etc).
Goku’s quote here is relevant because option 3 involves making yourself need to stop, as opposed to the first two which rely on raw willpower alone.
While both options 3 and 4 will alleviate any distress arising from unfulfillment of an unwelcome impulse, option 4 often proves to be beyond the range of methods that a person can reliably execute alone (because the mind is very complex, attempts to DIY option 4 with pharmacology may end up making the impulse worse). Option three usually has the best ROI, as it may require no drugs; as long as you maintain the needs hierarchy you constructed to relegate that unwelcome impulse, distress will not resurface. In fact, if you maintain the relegation for long enough, natural development of the mind may enact option 4 in the background.
[But you don’t want to count on this - most people (at some point in their lives) will have experienced a relegation by leveraging the power of survival instincts (either deliberately or involuntarily), only to find the impulse resurface with a vengeance once their mind switches out of ‘survival mode’.]
The willpower based methods do have their place, but both the pain associated with suppression and the degree of fulfillment required for a successful sublimation increase logarithmically the more times an unwelcome impulse is stunted. I don’t need to cite a paper to know this one, as I’ve got decades of experience trying to stifle my natural behaviour patterns...
You often hear tales of people who get ‘cured of faggotry’ after becoming religious converts. However, I don’t think those people suddenly turned straight, they just found some way to relegate their desire for sexual fulfillment below their desire to be a good servant of the faith. When you consider how strong the desire for sexual fulfillment is (lets not forget it’s the main reason why this site exists), actually being able to relegate it is one of the biggest flexes anyone can pull off. It’s very rare to see someone with the temperament of a Buddhist monk who wasn’t bolstered by a religious faith (@optimisticzoomer is probably the only one on here who might not fold if their dream girl started showing interest
)
Another OP benefit of religious conversion is mitigating negative effects of past traumas by way of something akin to the meaning making model - faith can infuse your life with a renewed sense of meaning, an improved self-perception and a typically supportive community to promote healing and mindfulness. If the source of an unwelcome impulse is a trauma response mechanism, resolving the trauma will allow for its elimination.
[Of course standard therapy may also be able to do this if you luck into a good treatment framework, but therapists are only human after all. Calling upon a belief in higher power will necessarily be more effective. You can always combine the two strategies, as the Catholics have done via the age old practice of confession
]
So yeah, that's why you regularly see people reply with ‘Find God’ whenever someone posts of experiencing great mental distress. If the source of your distress is an unwelcome recurring impulse, that’s a well-established working strategy.
My favourite scene in TV history is Gohan going SSJ in the time chamber. I first watched this on the small screen over 20 years ago, I must have been 5 or 6 years old.
Gohan goes SSJ for the first time [720p HD]
Maybe this scene just hits extra hard for me because I’ve always been a fucking disappointment, but the central message has stuck with me ever since…
In other words, sometimes raw willpower just isn’t enough to get the job done without an impetus of necessity.
In the realm of psychology, there are four known ways to prevent yourself from acting on an unwelcome recurring impulse. In order of difficulty:
I. Suppression - Actively trying to prevent the impulse from recurring and/or pretending it isn't there.
II. Sublimation - Locking in on a separate desire that is more acceptable or accessible.
III. Relegation - Placing your unwelcome impulse below a separate incompatible desire in your hierarchy of needs.
IV. Elimination - Figuring out which mental constructs or pathways are responsible for the impulse and inactivating them (through rewiring/blocking/excising/etc).
Goku’s quote here is relevant because option 3 involves making yourself need to stop, as opposed to the first two which rely on raw willpower alone.
While both options 3 and 4 will alleviate any distress arising from unfulfillment of an unwelcome impulse, option 4 often proves to be beyond the range of methods that a person can reliably execute alone (because the mind is very complex, attempts to DIY option 4 with pharmacology may end up making the impulse worse). Option three usually has the best ROI, as it may require no drugs; as long as you maintain the needs hierarchy you constructed to relegate that unwelcome impulse, distress will not resurface. In fact, if you maintain the relegation for long enough, natural development of the mind may enact option 4 in the background.
[But you don’t want to count on this - most people (at some point in their lives) will have experienced a relegation by leveraging the power of survival instincts (either deliberately or involuntarily), only to find the impulse resurface with a vengeance once their mind switches out of ‘survival mode’.]
The willpower based methods do have their place, but both the pain associated with suppression and the degree of fulfillment required for a successful sublimation increase logarithmically the more times an unwelcome impulse is stunted. I don’t need to cite a paper to know this one, as I’ve got decades of experience trying to stifle my natural behaviour patterns...
For as long as I can remember, my feminine inclinations have been causing problems for people. Of course, it’s water info that seeing a man emote in a feminine manner is distressing for pretty much everyone, but I had no concept of this when I was a fucking jit. In fact I got quite confused hearing people complain all the time about me acting like a girl, because I was never actively trying to do that. With the immature mental faculties I had, my interpretation was - I’m a lil nga, and I’m acting naturally, so why tf are people saying ts to me 
Looking back at it, what pisses me off the most was that at no point did anyone make a serious attempt to explain to YN’s how gender compliance standards were an important component of social interaction efficiency models that help form the foundation of a well ordered high trust society. No, I had to learn that shit from watching HOE MATH VIDEOS when I was fucking 26
. Instead, my family thought their time was better spent repeatedly calling me dishonourable, or demanding I dispense with specific mannerisms, or insinuating that guys who like acting feminine were essentially the scum of the earth - hoping that the power of shame would somehow put me in compliance with standards that I never saw a manual for 
Not to say I didn’t get the message. After all, it was true that I had never gotten good results doing it ‘my way’ (due mostly to poor looks, of course - which I had figured out was my main problem since before I was even 10). But of course, every time I put significant effort into acting masculine I paid the price by losing more of my zest for life, resulting in a trvly brutal negative social feedback loop:
> Get hostile responses from acting naturally due to being chopped
> Try acting more masculine because ngas gaslighted me into believing it will get me more respect
> Light drains from my eyes, resulting in people being even more unnerved than before because few things are scarier than a chopped nga who hates life
> My family says people don’t like me because I’m just not trying hard enough
> Attempt to give up (repeat from step 1) or push harder (repeat from step 2)
Sometimes I wish THEY HAD just dropped a couple bands on fag conversion therapy, because even the most deranged bible merchant would have quickly discerned 3 things in my case:
If (at any point prior to high school) somebody had acknowledged my pain and made an empathy-driven attempt at giving me directions to properly
"hold it down for the gang", even my low IQ ass could have understood that. No matter how painful certain aspects of acting masculine were for me, I could have at least Goggins’d my way through high school (with a mindset that my ‘sacrifice’ was ‘for a greater cause’ 
) and not spiraled all the way down to developing full blown depression-induced appetite loss during peak bone growth years. Not only did ts rob me of a good bit of forward growth (leaving me even more chopped), but it also prevented me from making meaningful progress in any physical activity - which was even more devastating for my psyche because gym and sports were my most viable avenues for sublimation/relegation 
.
[There was no way I was finding .net back in those days lmao, and even if I somehow did, my parents would just say that obsessing over looks is feminine even though they are both hard maxxers. Nothing they said would have really helped anyway unless I started eating
]
My best sublimation attempt was making shitty beats in FL studio, but since I never quite got over the learning curve (It was even harder in 2013 than it is now), I didn’t get much fulfillment from that. I often grew so tired of the usual LTN copes that I would say ‘fuck it I’m doing homework now’, so my grades stayed near the top. I ended up selling my xbox when I was 16 in favour of working the depression shift at Papa Johns after school (beyond monetising my despair, it was a great excuse for never being seen at the function
).
Instead of getting a rhino or fillers (or gambling
), I ended up spending all my money on a car and university tuitions (I basically got scammed into pursuing a degree because my dogshit physical condition had left me poorly suited for the trades and school was the only thing I wasn’t actively fucked at). And still, the more tragic loss from my high school years was burning through all of my best suppression methods 
. Thankfully alcohol and xanny’s were there to ‘save’ me from the pain during the first 2 years of uni, and coursework took up most of my free time for the last two (I ended up driving a city bus part time to pay rent at this point, meaning survival instincts were also kicking in). If COVID did anything for me, at least I finally gained some weight so I could take the grind more seriously when I graduated.
I suspect the main reason why conversion therapies often make their target conditions worse is because amping up negative reinforcement just leads you to burn through good suppression methods faster than you normally would, and rarely offers a viable outlet for sublimation (much less relegation). How are you going to be truly motivated to overcome an impulse when everyone telling you to stop just seems to be acting abusive and overbearing for arbitrary reasons?
Looking back at it, what pisses me off the most was that at no point did anyone make a serious attempt to explain to YN’s how gender compliance standards were an important component of social interaction efficiency models that help form the foundation of a well ordered high trust society. No, I had to learn that shit from watching HOE MATH VIDEOS when I was fucking 26
. Instead, my family thought their time was better spent repeatedly calling me dishonourable, or demanding I dispense with specific mannerisms, or insinuating that guys who like acting feminine were essentially the scum of the earth - hoping that the power of shame would somehow put me in compliance with standards that I never saw a manual for Not to say I didn’t get the message. After all, it was true that I had never gotten good results doing it ‘my way’ (due mostly to poor looks, of course - which I had figured out was my main problem since before I was even 10). But of course, every time I put significant effort into acting masculine I paid the price by losing more of my zest for life, resulting in a trvly brutal negative social feedback loop:
> Get hostile responses from acting naturally due to being chopped
> Try acting more masculine because ngas gaslighted me into believing it will get me more respect
> Light drains from my eyes, resulting in people being even more unnerved than before because few things are scarier than a chopped nga who hates life
> My family says people don’t like me because I’m just not trying hard enough
> Attempt to give up (repeat from step 1) or push harder (repeat from step 2)
Sometimes I wish THEY HAD just dropped a couple bands on fag conversion therapy, because even the most deranged bible merchant would have quickly discerned 3 things in my case:
- I have always been fucking straight
- I had originally developed a strong moral compass
- Accountability and honour mean a lot to me
If (at any point prior to high school) somebody had acknowledged my pain and made an empathy-driven attempt at giving me directions to properly
"hold it down for the gang", even my low IQ ass could have understood that. No matter how painful certain aspects of acting masculine were for me, I could have at least Goggins’d my way through high school (with a mindset that my ‘sacrifice’ was ‘for a greater cause’ ) and not spiraled all the way down to developing full blown depression-induced appetite loss during peak bone growth years. Not only did ts rob me of a good bit of forward growth (leaving me even more chopped), but it also prevented me from making meaningful progress in any physical activity - which was even more devastating for my psyche because gym and sports were my most viable avenues for sublimation/relegation .[There was no way I was finding .net back in those days lmao, and even if I somehow did, my parents would just say that obsessing over looks is feminine even though they are both hard maxxers. Nothing they said would have really helped anyway unless I started eating
]My best sublimation attempt was making shitty beats in FL studio, but since I never quite got over the learning curve (It was even harder in 2013 than it is now), I didn’t get much fulfillment from that. I often grew so tired of the usual LTN copes that I would say ‘fuck it I’m doing homework now’, so my grades stayed near the top. I ended up selling my xbox when I was 16 in favour of working the depression shift at Papa Johns after school (beyond monetising my despair, it was a great excuse for never being seen at the function
).Instead of getting a rhino or fillers (or gambling
), I ended up spending all my money on a car and university tuitions (I basically got scammed into pursuing a degree because my dogshit physical condition had left me poorly suited for the trades and school was the only thing I wasn’t actively fucked at). And still, the more tragic loss from my high school years was burning through all of my best suppression methods . Thankfully alcohol and xanny’s were there to ‘save’ me from the pain during the first 2 years of uni, and coursework took up most of my free time for the last two (I ended up driving a city bus part time to pay rent at this point, meaning survival instincts were also kicking in). If COVID did anything for me, at least I finally gained some weight so I could take the grind more seriously when I graduated.I suspect the main reason why conversion therapies often make their target conditions worse is because amping up negative reinforcement just leads you to burn through good suppression methods faster than you normally would, and rarely offers a viable outlet for sublimation (much less relegation). How are you going to be truly motivated to overcome an impulse when everyone telling you to stop just seems to be acting abusive and overbearing for arbitrary reasons?
You often hear tales of people who get ‘cured of faggotry’ after becoming religious converts. However, I don’t think those people suddenly turned straight, they just found some way to relegate their desire for sexual fulfillment below their desire to be a good servant of the faith. When you consider how strong the desire for sexual fulfillment is (lets not forget it’s the main reason why this site exists), actually being able to relegate it is one of the biggest flexes anyone can pull off. It’s very rare to see someone with the temperament of a Buddhist monk who wasn’t bolstered by a religious faith (@optimisticzoomer is probably the only one on here who might not fold if their dream girl started showing interest
)Another OP benefit of religious conversion is mitigating negative effects of past traumas by way of something akin to the meaning making model - faith can infuse your life with a renewed sense of meaning, an improved self-perception and a typically supportive community to promote healing and mindfulness. If the source of an unwelcome impulse is a trauma response mechanism, resolving the trauma will allow for its elimination.
[Of course standard therapy may also be able to do this if you luck into a good treatment framework, but therapists are only human after all. Calling upon a belief in higher power will necessarily be more effective. You can always combine the two strategies, as the Catholics have done via the age old practice of confession
]So yeah, that's why you regularly see people reply with ‘Find God’ whenever someone posts of experiencing great mental distress. If the source of your distress is an unwelcome recurring impulse, that’s a well-established working strategy.
Although my only 'successful' relegation thus far of my feminine inclinations has been with in relation to my desire to lift heavy ass weights, it turns out they really aren’t that incompatible with gymcelling and so most of them have now breached containment 
. Since I’ve lost the ability to view religions as anything other than pure cope designed to help NPC’s process fear of death, I’m probably out of good relegation strategies unless I somehow start a family 
. But we can still call it a success; since its keeping me away from the damn estrogen injections, I’m technically still in the fight. I have no idea if there’s still a win for me to bring home at this point, but I’ll never stop believing. And y’all ready know why
YOU CAN'T STOP A COPER FROM COPING
@unon @Feuerwehr @Histy
. Since I’ve lost the ability to view religions as anything other than pure cope designed to help NPC’s process fear of death, I’m probably out of good relegation strategies unless I somehow start a family . But we can still call it a success; since its keeping me away from the damn estrogen injections, I’m technically still in the fight. I have no idea if there’s still a win for me to bring home at this point, but I’ll never stop believing. And y’all ready know whyYOU CAN'T STOP A COPER FROM COPING
@unon @Feuerwehr @Histy
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