Crowley
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- Mar 28, 2020
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I started having this shit at very young age and couldn’t control it for shit -
Mine is more on the obsessive spectrum tho, for example, I would occasionally think about killing random people and there would suddenly appear flashes in my head of me stabbing, shotting or having sex with my parents / family / anyone nearby jfl - but all of that stayed only in the imaginative side, i.e. I never really acted on any of it
at 12 coincidentally or not when puberty began, I started obsessing with incest with my mom although I never really had any sexual attraction to her and never really got hard to her or anything.
Nevertheless, I would still feel like shit for having those thoughts. After that, at 15 I think, the violent thoughts started and I got depressed by months because I knew sooner or later I would do some fucked up shit and end up in jail, so that used to scary the shit out of me
At 20 (last year) I had the balls to confess it to my father and luckily I found out he is just like me, he even contemplated suicide during some of his mental breakdowns, took medicines for months and even went through therapy with a psychiatrist lol
Some weeks after that, he sent me to a session with a psychiatrist and it was very useless tbh jfl:
Basically we talked, I told her it had been a long time since I had my last breakup, she asked me if I thought I would need medication, to which I replied no, and that’s it.
I’ve overcome this shit without meds, now I can control it very well and it doesn’t bother me anymore, barely getting the intrusive thoughts, and when they come, I just let it go because I’m sure and convinced myself that nothing will happen and it’s all temporary.
Brain is weird af lol
Mine is more on the obsessive spectrum tho, for example, I would occasionally think about killing random people and there would suddenly appear flashes in my head of me stabbing, shotting or having sex with my parents / family / anyone nearby jfl - but all of that stayed only in the imaginative side, i.e. I never really acted on any of it
at 12 coincidentally or not when puberty began, I started obsessing with incest with my mom although I never really had any sexual attraction to her and never really got hard to her or anything.
Nevertheless, I would still feel like shit for having those thoughts. After that, at 15 I think, the violent thoughts started and I got depressed by months because I knew sooner or later I would do some fucked up shit and end up in jail, so that used to scary the shit out of me
At 20 (last year) I had the balls to confess it to my father and luckily I found out he is just like me, he even contemplated suicide during some of his mental breakdowns, took medicines for months and even went through therapy with a psychiatrist lol
Some weeks after that, he sent me to a session with a psychiatrist and it was very useless tbh jfl:
Basically we talked, I told her it had been a long time since I had my last breakup, she asked me if I thought I would need medication, to which I replied no, and that’s it.
I’ve overcome this shit without meds, now I can control it very well and it doesn’t bother me anymore, barely getting the intrusive thoughts, and when they come, I just let it go because I’m sure and convinced myself that nothing will happen and it’s all temporary.
Brain is weird af lol
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