ATTRACTIVE HOBBIES ?

[manof_zenile]

What hobbies and passions should i pursue to become attractive ?, such as going to the gym, martial arts, etc

 

[7Azcendr7]

gym for sure

 

[MirinDaZygos]

What hobbies and passions should i pursue to become attractive ?, such as going to the gym, martial arts, etc

all cope

 

[zeptoy]

swimming

 

[finessed]

What hobbies and passions should i pursue to become attractive ?, such as going to the gym, martial arts, etc

Swimming, gym and mma but I think the most girls prolly love football and basketball boys

 

[manof_zenile]

all cope

hmmm explain

 

[manof_zenile]

bump

 

[Canthus23]

photography, swimming, writing, painting, gardening, woodworking, cooking, reading
heavy on painting cooking and reading these are def top tier for female attraction not some gym or shit like martial arts
mark as solution

 

[manof_zenile]

photography, swimming, writing, painting, gardening, woodworking, cooking, reading
heavy on painting cooking and reading these are def top tier for female attraction not some gym or shit like martial arts
mark as solution

what makes a hobby attractive ?

 

[Graham]

Hobbies are only attractive if you're attractive. Something like going to the gym wont make you more attractive unless you're specifically doing it to improve your looks etc (which means dieting, getting lean etc too, not just becoming super big and bloated). Same with something like swimming, you don't need to be a 6'5 Greek god to start swimming, nor will it make you one (genetics > environment).

If someone already likes you, then something like MMA might be a bonus because it makes you more competent in other areas as being able to fight is a useful skill to have, just like swimming could save your life.

I guess to put it more simply, something that gives you more skills will improve your life in general, and enhance any attraction that is already there - but it won't ever make attraction, so don't ask what hobbies will make you more attractive, but rather do what hobbies you enjoy and will make you grow as a person.

 

[Canthus23]

what makes a hobby attractive ?

reading/writing can suggest intelligence or depth
cooking can suggest independence (also who doesnt like good food)
painting can suggest creativity

 

[dvrstx]

just do what you want bro, why would you force yourself to do something for a hope of increasing your chances of getting girls

 

[thanos0]

What hobbies and passions should i pursue to become attractive ?, such as going to the gym, martial arts, etc

Pic something that you like and your are good at, because at the end of the day that's the most attractive thing for a man. Being passionate about something and being his true self and not chasing validation from others like a bitch. If a female detects that you are being fake and you just chase validation she will immediately lose respect for you

 

[manof_zenile]

" something that gives you more skills will improve your life in general, and enhance any attraction that is already there"

what are the highest yield skills that give the best improvement ?

 

[manof_zenile]

just do what you want bro, why would you force yourself to do something for a hope of increasing your chances of getting girls

what i want is to be attractive, therefore what i will do should fulfil my goal of not only helping me become attractive ( working out, athleticism), but should also inherently be attractive as an activity

 

[manof_zenile]

Pic something that you like and your are good at, because at the end of the day that's the most attractive thing for a man. Being passionate about something and being his true self and not chasing validation from others like a bitch. If a female detects that you are being fake and you just chase validation she will immediately lose respect for

my true self is the validation i get from others

 

[dvrstx]

what i want is to be attractive, therefore what i will do should fulfil my goal of not only helping me become attractive ( working out, athleticism), but should also inherently be attractive as an activity

no, what you want is better bones, what you do is cope. Do something you actually want to do instead of coping

 

[thanos0]

my true self is the validation i get from others

I think validation can reflect parts of who we are, but it can’t define our true self. If your sense of self depends entirely on how others see you, then you’re always changing with their gaze. Maybe your truest self is what remains when there’s no one left to impress or validate you.

 

[Zxcpivomaster]

photography, swimming, writing, painting, gardening, woodworking, cooking, reading
heavy on painting cooking and reading these are def top tier for female attraction not some gym or shit like martial arts
mark as solution

Really good tip

 

[manof_zenile]

I think validation can reflect parts of who we are, but it can’t define our true self. If your sense of self depends entirely on how others see you, then you’re always changing with their gaze. Maybe your truest self is what remains when there’s no one left to impress or validate you.

thank you for this eye opening response, over the past few days ive been having an existential crisis of what my life even is, like i genuinely have nothing going for me other than doing to med school due to parental pressure...

 

[manof_zenile]

I think validation can reflect parts of who we are, but it can’t define our true self. If your sense of self depends entirely on how others see you, then you’re always changing with their gaze. Maybe your truest self is what remains when there’s no one left to impress or validate you.

humans are inherently social, what made us survive is sticking together in tribes or some stuff like that, and validation from others is what you got to confirm that youre part of the pack and therefore will survive

whats the point if its not to impress others ?

 

[Mr_Cali]

What hobbies and passions should i pursue to become attractive ?, such as going to the gym, martial arts, etc

Gym and martial arts is all u need

 

[thanos0]

humans are inherently social, what made us survive is sticking together in tribes or some stuff like that, and validation from others is what you got to confirm that youre part of the pack and therefore will survive

whats the point if its not to impress others ?

I think you’re right that humans are deeply social, and that belonging and validation are fundamental to us. But maybe there’s a difference between wanting to be seen and living only to be seen. There is inherently a subconscious force that drives us to be chasing validation but it's up to you to make sure it doesn't make your purpose only to impress others.

I have had the same crisis I what I realized after studding Friedrich Nietzsche and other philosophers is that maybe the whole point isn’t to impress the tribe, but to find something within yourself that genuinely feels worth living for like your ideas, your beliefs, the things you care about, even if nobody applauds you for them. You can still want love, recognition, and belonging without making them the measure of your worth.

Otherwise, you risk spending your whole life performing a role that everyone else chose for you. And maybe this existential crisis is partly your mind asking whether the life you’re living is actually yours, or just a life that makes sense to everyone else.

 

[thanos0]

thank you for this eye opening response, over the past few days ive been having an existential crisis of what my life even is, like i genuinely have nothing going for me other than doing to med school due to parental pressure...

It really means a lot to me knowing that I was able to help someone. I think there’s something so special about being able to make even the smallest difference in someone’s life. Knowing that something I said or did made things a little easier, lighter, or better for someone genuinely means more to me than I can put into words.

 

[manof_zenile]

I think you’re right that humans are deeply social, and that belonging and validation are fundamental to us. But maybe there’s a difference between wanting to be seen and living only to be seen. There is inherently a subconscious force that drives us to be chasing validation but it's up to you to make sure it doesn't make your purpose only to impress others.

I have had the same crisis I what I realized after studding Friedrich Nietzsche and other philosophers is that maybe the whole point isn’t to impress the tribe, but to find something within yourself that genuinely feels worth living for like your ideas, your beliefs, the things you care about, even if nobody applauds you for them. You can still want love, recognition, and belonging without making them the measure of your worth.

Otherwise, you risk spending your whole life performing a role that everyone else chose for you. And maybe this existential crisis is partly your mind asking whether the life you’re living is actually yours, or just a life that makes sense to everyone else.

gimme a sec i read this bro

 

[manof_zenile]

It really means a lot to me knowing that I was able to help someone. I think there’s something so special about being able to make even the smallest difference in someone’s life. Knowing that something I said or did made things a little easier, lighter, or better for someone genuinely means more to me than I can put into words.

 

[manof_zenile]

It really means a lot to me knowing that I was able to help someone. I think there’s something so special about being able to make even the smallest difference in someone’s life. Knowing that something I said or did made things a little easier, lighter, or better for someone genuinely means more to me than I can put into words.

cant thank you enough brother

 

[manof_zenile]

I think you’re right that humans are deeply social, and that belonging and validation are fundamental to us. But maybe there’s a difference between wanting to be seen and living only to be seen. There is inherently a subconscious force that drives us to be chasing validation but it's up to you to make sure it doesn't make your purpose only to impress others.

I have had the same crisis I what I realized after studding Friedrich Nietzsche and other philosophers is that maybe the whole point isn’t to impress the tribe, but to find something within yourself that genuinely feels worth living for like your ideas, your beliefs, the things you care about, even if nobody applauds you for them. You can still want love, recognition, and belonging without making them the measure of your worth.

Otherwise, you risk spending your whole life performing a role that everyone else chose for you. And maybe this existential crisis is partly your mind asking whether the life you’re living is actually yours, or just a life that makes sense to everyone else.

dont even know how to respond to this but im definitely looking into what i would do even if noone is watching, i genuinely dont have a goal that i wouldnt do if there wasnt some sort of validation system in play, let that be from parental pressure or the attention of others like friends or the opposite sex.

How do i find what im passionate at, even if noone is watching ?

 

[thanos0]

dont even know how to respond to this but im definitely looking into what i would do even if noone is watching, i genuinely dont have a goal that i wouldnt do if there wasnt some sort of validation system in play, let that be from parental pressure or the attention of others like friends or the opposite sex.

How do i find what im passionate at, even if noone is watching ?

Maybe you don’t have to find your passion immediately. I think we put too much pressure on ourselves to discover some grand purpose, when sometimes you only find out what matters to you by trying things without expecting them to become your purpose.

I’d also think about what you actually believe about the world. What kind of person do you want to be? What do you think is worth protecting, creating, understanding, or standing up for? Sometimes passion comes less from a specific activity and more from having certain values and wanting to live in accordance with them.

Maybe ask yourself: ‘If nobody could praise, judge, or even know what I chose to do with my life, how would I spend my time?’ You might not find one perfect answer, but the things you keep returning to could tell you something. You don’t necessarily find your purpose first and then live it. Sometimes you explore, form your values, and gradually build a life that feels like your own.

The best advice I could give anyone is to read more philosophy. You could start with Carl Jung or Friedrich Nietzsche, I think you’d be surprised by how much their ideas can help you understand yourself, find answers to questions you’ve been carrying, and, perhaps more importantly, discover new questions you never thought to ask.

 

[Graham]

what are the highest yield skills that give the best improvement ?

I can't answer that for you.

 

[cashcow]

become attractive socially or physically?

 

[orticular]

i mean i larped surfing and it helped me pull so