Levirin
Living with death is better than just "living"
- Joined
- Apr 17, 2026
- Posts
- 91
- Reputation
- 23
This was when I was 61kg all after recovering from sickness and ankle break and losing weight and all that
now this was when I came back to fight days and started going up classes
Full story Abt what had happened I broke my left ankle in 2023 June I started my martial arts like tkd wrestling judo jiujitsu lethwei mma everything in 2021 but wasn't serious until 2022-2023 finally started fighting having over 200 fights including TKOs an KOs but after the ankle injury I lost my fight weight and performance and instincts and like for one year 2024 I didn't do anything or trained I just tried to gain back weight although my training ideas wasn't correct so I fell sick more and lost weight again until 2025 came I started boxing coached by a friend who was a pro and had alot of fights too but now retired so like i lost fights to him many times and I'm just tired and had some other fights too lost them all I can't find myself no more I've lost my power and everything overall but the least is that I managed losing fat and all the sickness I had out of all of them in September to October if i remember when I was in boys dorm I got severe disease sick and made me jump down to 50 and I had never seen such lean version of myself back then I couldn't walk or stand in hospital or eat at all when I first went to bathroom saw the whole changed version of myself I was thinking should I be happy or regret I used to be once fighter while also in some cadet army type shit although I was trained mainly based on warfare combat during those prizefight combat days later switching full time prizefight combat sports had me fucked up my performance lately later on I kept training with good knowledge this time and finally in 2026 present I reached 73kg middleweight rising from my low class weight 52 to 60 to 62 to 64 to 69 and finally 73 after so many loses I regret bulking up I hate myself and my looks now I sometimes feel enough is enough and wanna take my own life I was assualted in the school bathroom falsely accusing me for something those boys still lurks around me and taunts me was it all cuz of racism that I'm not their kind or is it that I'm ugly I can't do this anymore I feel unappreciated and unseen and like don't belong or that I've messed something iam ugly
Full story Abt what had happened I broke my left ankle in 2023 June I started my martial arts like tkd wrestling judo jiujitsu lethwei mma everything in 2021 but wasn't serious until 2022-2023 finally started fighting having over 200 fights including TKOs an KOs but after the ankle injury I lost my fight weight and performance and instincts and like for one year 2024 I didn't do anything or trained I just tried to gain back weight although my training ideas wasn't correct so I fell sick more and lost weight again until 2025 came I started boxing coached by a friend who was a pro and had alot of fights too but now retired so like i lost fights to him many times and I'm just tired and had some other fights too lost them all I can't find myself no more I've lost my power and everything overall but the least is that I managed losing fat and all the sickness I had out of all of them in September to October if i remember when I was in boys dorm I got severe disease sick and made me jump down to 50 and I had never seen such lean version of myself back then I couldn't walk or stand in hospital or eat at all when I first went to bathroom saw the whole changed version of myself I was thinking should I be happy or regret I used to be once fighter while also in some cadet army type shit although I was trained mainly based on warfare combat during those prizefight combat days later switching full time prizefight combat sports had me fucked up my performance lately later on I kept training with good knowledge this time and finally in 2026 present I reached 73kg middleweight rising from my low class weight 52 to 60 to 62 to 64 to 69 and finally 73 after so many loses I regret bulking up I hate myself and my looks now I sometimes feel enough is enough and wanna take my own life I was assualted in the school bathroom falsely accusing me for something those boys still lurks around me and taunts me was it all cuz of racism that I'm not their kind or is it that I'm ugly I can't do this anymore I feel unappreciated and unseen and like don't belong or that I've messed something iam ugly
