AlexAP
Fuchsia
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“I thought that maybe I was just too sexual, that I put too much emotion into sex, that maybe sex was more important to me than it should have been. I thought that maybe I shouldn't want it so much.”
In many relationships, it’s often the man who asks for sex more often than the woman. But sometimes, roles are reversed. Weston freely admits she has “either a higher libido than most women or am more sexually liberated,” and it was something her abuser discovered he could use against her.
“Our relationship was largely based on my sexual attraction to him, and sex was used as weapon in order to control me,” she says. Weston knows it’s hard for some survivors to understand. After all, why would you want to be intimate with your abuser? But she says intimacy brought her hope - maybe things were going to get better now - and it was also a way to fix things when they went awry. “I wanted to do everything I could to make him happy when things were rocky and unpredictable,” she admits.
www.domesticshelters.org
This was her with her ex-boyfriend:
In many relationships, it’s often the man who asks for sex more often than the woman. But sometimes, roles are reversed. Weston freely admits she has “either a higher libido than most women or am more sexually liberated,” and it was something her abuser discovered he could use against her.
“Our relationship was largely based on my sexual attraction to him, and sex was used as weapon in order to control me,” she says. Weston knows it’s hard for some survivors to understand. After all, why would you want to be intimate with your abuser? But she says intimacy brought her hope - maybe things were going to get better now - and it was also a way to fix things when they went awry. “I wanted to do everything I could to make him happy when things were rocky and unpredictable,” she admits.
Withholding Intimacy Can Be Abusive, Too
One survivor says her abusive boyfriend withheld intimacy in order to control her.