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BigJimsWornOutTires

BigJimsWornOutTires

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"You swallowed it?"

"Aaaah," she hummed, verifying her mouth gaped, revealing a glassy tongue with a thin white film in the back of her throat that looked like a bubble popping.

"Ugh. I'm done with this." I said as I slid my legs off the bed, stood up, and searched the floor for my clothes.

"What do you mean-you're done?"

"I'm done with this erotic bullshit." I grabbed my novelty tee off the floor that displayed the CCP inside the Chinese flag logo placed on the left chest.

"Why? Not many can bring the reader into that world the way you describe it." She said as I donned the shirt. Although the back had a misinformation decal from the front that displayed a world war scenario with mushroom cloud explosions, buildings crumbling, and three letters rising from the ashes. NWO.

I located my bunny slippers, sat on the bed, and began sliding one by one while replying, "That wasn't the plan, Pam. I was trying to identify who I was. And that lustful past consumed most of my life. And for what?" I stand up.

Pam continued resting on the bed, naked with her back against the headboard. Finally, she said, "But it is what it is. Nothing you can do to change that past." She reached the nightstand nearest and grabbed a pink vibrator that rested atop as I walked to the bathroom.

"I figured by venturing into that abyss; I would find something I'm missing." Standing near the bathroom counter, I opened the medicine cabinet while speaking loudly.

"Like what?" She turns on the vibe. A pulsating buzz is heard. She thumbs the wheel gadget on its side. The sound becomes louder and faster.

I grab a bottle of pleasure lotion from the cabinet, close the door, and proceed back to the bedroom while speaking, "Ugh. Perhaps a blocked memory. Something forgotten. A purpose of why I'm still breathing. I can't be this lucky." I hand her the bottle.

"Hmm. That's tricky," Pam squeezes a translucent fluid into a hand. "Especially considering I'm also you. Did you really believe the readers weren't going to figure out these characters, me, for example, are nothing more than voices in your head you give life to?" Then, she disappears, and the living quarters manifest into a black void as I hover in the nothing wearing only a t-shirt and oversized fluffy bunny slippers.

"Ugh, snapper crappers. But what about the infamous authors? What about the voices of their characters? Are you saying Stephen King's Pennywise pedo-clown is a real entity and only he can interview?"

Spheres materialize around—thousands of them! One wobble in place, that feminine voice before is reflected from it, "Wealthy schizophrenics are called authors, Jim. That society doesn't wish your stain upon them. That's why we call them authors and you, skitzos. It's to keep the two separated even though both have the same condition. For example, when a poor person steals, it's called theft. But when a prosperous member does, it's called business and politics."

"Ugh. Well. That sucks."

"But not as good as the way I do, uh?" The bedroom scene appeared in front like a peep show exhibition as I saw that bubble blowing me.

"Ugh, cringe, voice-bubble, did you even hear me? I said I'm done!" The void quickly returns. The thousands of bubbles sparkled with various colors for a moment but returned to transparency.

"If not erotic fiction-," the bubble said; I interrupted.

"Non-fiction."

"Fine. If not for erotic non-fiction, what then? Please don't turn to sci-fi and end up like Ron Hubbard, petting celebrities to have them think they have a greater purpose. A whore is a whore. One shouldn't sugarcoat that."

"Ugh. I was thinking along the line of drama."

"The whiney teary family abuse Lifetime kind?" The other spheres quickly moved away from the talking bubble as if it were Covid-19.

"Bingo," I confirmed my plan.

"Eww, cringe." The talking bubble decreased in size.

"Exactly. But the kind of drama I'd like to make would contain a twist. Like of a Night Shyamalan curry substance."

"Uh-huh. Example?" It said and grew back to its prior size.

"Okay. So it's about a married couple making ends meet. They have a chihuahua." The other bubbles return from their separation gather around once again. "And they need a dog sitter. So they hire this college coed-" The thousands of bubbles begin illuminating in various colors.

"This sounds familiar."

"So the college coed is striving to make a little extra dough for college stuff. But ugh, the way she dresses is rather seductive." The spheres begin dancing, wobbling, rapidly changing sizes as if something excited them.

"Yup. Another erotica."

"Ugh. You're right. But that wasn't my intention." The bubbles return to their dull posture. The lights go out. "I wanna make beautiful stories, but they keep ending in cheap 70s porn scenes." They flicker once.

"Mm-mm. There you have it!"

"Have what?"

"Your mind was programmed with those images. Which happens to be what you were influenced to growing up. Do you see?" The bubbles slowly creep away as if a new variant occurred.

"Ugh. So how do I erase them?" The spheres turn red and rush around me in attack formation!

"You can't. But you can cluster your mind with new images. Like horror sagas."

"Ugh. Jeepers creepers. It sounds like something my ex-stalker-gf does. She used me to become a horror fiction author." One of the spheres expanded quickly, engulfing everything! There was a soft red glow everywhere. This eerie red bubble consumed the darkness.

The other spheres backed away and returned to their positions around the talker as she said, "Fuck her."

"But no, I don't ever want to do that again. She's evil."

"Well, what about a new genre creation?" The bubble that had engulfed everything popped! And the void was once again.

He didn't reply. But he had noticed something in the far distance of those thousands of spheres. Eyes. My eyes, to be exact. But he didn't seem surprised as a monitor emerged a foot from him and looted his attention. "Ugh," he grunted and extended his arm with a finger pointing to the screen. He pressed against a particular image button that printed Post thread.
 
This tale cryptically hid a gnome. Can you uncover the charm?
 
t read GIF
 
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