C
crossed star
Iron
- Joined
- Jan 20, 2025
- Posts
- 28
- Reputation
- 10
i cant even think, i forget everything cause i cant take my face, by how ugly is it, i cant accept it. i dont want to go outside of my house, my room, i dont want to see anyone. i forget everything causing to not be able to think, cause if i think i automatically remember things cause thinking is remembering. it affected my studies, i used to be smart, now i cant even think lmao, i used to be able to remember ecerything i want to, everything i laid my eyes to, now when i tried to remeber something i cant even remember besides the first sentence, i would always not participate to performance tasks in our school that will require me to memorize something, i will go up in the front of the class trying to recite something i should have memorize and be able to memorize, it should be easy to memorize like what my classmate did but the whole day before class, i have been thinking of the performance task that i need to say at the front of the task, everytime i go up in the front of the class, i forget everything, my groupmates sneekered at me and feel that am unlucky cause of what i cant do. am only a shame in classroom and all of it because i feel so ugly about myself. i cant even think about the digital trace i will left doing this, and i still decided to post this without thinking about it and its consequenses, maybe what i feel is just that too much for me so i do this not even being able to think cause its too much for me. and i really need to vent? i dont even figure out my feelings, i dont know what i feel, and am scared of judgement from people here, but i wonder why do i want still to vent here, i would post here until i know it. until maybe i can think.
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