BigJimsWornOutTires
Kraken
- Joined
- Feb 6, 2021
- Posts
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During my midlife crisis, watching these fucktards drive mobilized carriages was embarrassing. Fucking parasites weren't happy with the horses. And they called the horseless carriage horsepower? Brutal. So I headed to a bar, and there was a sign on the door and window, CLOSED - ALCOHOL NOW PROHIBITED.
Fatherfuckers! They had to do it. Fucking greedy, arrogant assholes wanted all the money. So, of course, ban alcohol and relegalize it under government control. Control the substance for greater gain. Smh.
"Eh, forget about it, hey!" A skinny feller said as he passed me, walking fast.
I hollered, "I need bugpiss!" He stopped. He turned around and walked to me.
"Hey, I'll tell you a good place with lots of sweet booze. But you gonna have to wet my beak, if you know what I mean?" He spoke while rubbing his fingers against his thumb. That pissed me off. I felt he suggested that he suck my dick in exchange for alcohol. I looked around for people. There were a few across the street. I punch him in his gut. He loses his breath. I grab his head into a headlock and walk him into a dark alley.
"Where's the booze, little man?" I asked.
"Gee, big feller, stop being a poor sport! I was just trying to make a little dough." He explained in a weak pussyless fashion.
"Wrong answer," I push him down and execute a flawless splash knee first. He exhaled the rest of his breath. His face turned blue. I grabbed his shirt collar and lifted him as I stood. "Where's the bugpiss?"
Exhausted, he finally revealed the location, "There's ... there's a deli ... on Fifth off of Main ... go inside and order The Big Roast."
"I'm not hungry, little man. You're wearing out my patience!" I raise my voice and boost him higher.
"That's the code word. Big Roast. They'll let you into the storage room where the bar is, along with a poker table. Please ... let me go." He begged like a French queer.
"So be it!" I dropped him and proceeded to that hidden bar and got shitfaced drunk.
Successfully doxxed me.
Fatherfuckers! They had to do it. Fucking greedy, arrogant assholes wanted all the money. So, of course, ban alcohol and relegalize it under government control. Control the substance for greater gain. Smh.
"Eh, forget about it, hey!" A skinny feller said as he passed me, walking fast.
I hollered, "I need bugpiss!" He stopped. He turned around and walked to me.
"Hey, I'll tell you a good place with lots of sweet booze. But you gonna have to wet my beak, if you know what I mean?" He spoke while rubbing his fingers against his thumb. That pissed me off. I felt he suggested that he suck my dick in exchange for alcohol. I looked around for people. There were a few across the street. I punch him in his gut. He loses his breath. I grab his head into a headlock and walk him into a dark alley.
"Where's the booze, little man?" I asked.
"Gee, big feller, stop being a poor sport! I was just trying to make a little dough." He explained in a weak pussyless fashion.
"Wrong answer," I push him down and execute a flawless splash knee first. He exhaled the rest of his breath. His face turned blue. I grabbed his shirt collar and lifted him as I stood. "Where's the bugpiss?"
Exhausted, he finally revealed the location, "There's ... there's a deli ... on Fifth off of Main ... go inside and order The Big Roast."
"I'm not hungry, little man. You're wearing out my patience!" I raise my voice and boost him higher.
"That's the code word. Big Roast. They'll let you into the storage room where the bar is, along with a poker table. Please ... let me go." He begged like a French queer.
"So be it!" I dropped him and proceeded to that hidden bar and got shitfaced drunk.
Successfully doxxed me.
