Ctrozo
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2024
- Posts
- 528
- Reputation
- 2,140
Today, I fuckin dropped out of highschool, n I’m still khhv. no teen love no parties. Then got a wageslave job, n started it the same day. Took 400mg modaf before first time. And overexerted myself to utter shit bc it gave me the illusion of infinite stamina. After the drug wore off it was brutal n I thought I was gna pass out.
Then I’m vomitting out most of the food I’m force feeding myself, 0 hunger at all at all, even after all the work I did. Drunk 200 ml of powdered drinks and n ate 1 small banana which I had to take like half an hr to get down. I believe it’s caused from severe liver damage coming in from superdrol.
Then got hit w a sudden wave of the most brutal depression-like feeling ive ever faced in my life, ought to be the worse feeling ive ever faced in my life. I’m diagnosed w depression but this was 100x worse than any “depression” I’ve felt before. It was complete numbness n a sense of doom that i didn’t even know could exist. Like my death was impending in a way or that i just had to kill myself right then. Because I saw no other path. The strongest sense of “it’s over” EVER. It was making me wna vomit n cry but I just couldn’t it was fucked up. Usually I would get nervous if a girl is near me. This time there was not even a molecule of anxiety. And also not even an ounce of attraction or horniness for any girl I saw. That’s how u know just how brutal it was bro that I literally became fucking lustless, asexual monk when I’m currently on TREN.
Then I cut off my mom so now I won’t ever see her again, it was fucked but I had my reasons. Then I finally get home, and find out my dad is abt to go to prison for assaulting a police officer.
I went upstairs to lay down and opened my camera app, n see that both of my eye’s has heavily bruised blood vessels that are red asf. Here I lifted up my eyelid to get a better view at it
mb it’s kinda nasty but i felt like I should put some kind of proof for the shit I’m saying
Everything done today on death tier sleep n stimulants. While also having a big painful quad bruise from incorrect injection. N i didn’t even mention everything. There’s prob another 5,6 things that happened that I didn’t bring up.
pray for me
Then I’m vomitting out most of the food I’m force feeding myself, 0 hunger at all at all, even after all the work I did. Drunk 200 ml of powdered drinks and n ate 1 small banana which I had to take like half an hr to get down. I believe it’s caused from severe liver damage coming in from superdrol.
Then got hit w a sudden wave of the most brutal depression-like feeling ive ever faced in my life, ought to be the worse feeling ive ever faced in my life. I’m diagnosed w depression but this was 100x worse than any “depression” I’ve felt before. It was complete numbness n a sense of doom that i didn’t even know could exist. Like my death was impending in a way or that i just had to kill myself right then. Because I saw no other path. The strongest sense of “it’s over” EVER. It was making me wna vomit n cry but I just couldn’t it was fucked up. Usually I would get nervous if a girl is near me. This time there was not even a molecule of anxiety. And also not even an ounce of attraction or horniness for any girl I saw. That’s how u know just how brutal it was bro that I literally became fucking lustless, asexual monk when I’m currently on TREN.
Then I cut off my mom so now I won’t ever see her again, it was fucked but I had my reasons. Then I finally get home, and find out my dad is abt to go to prison for assaulting a police officer.
I went upstairs to lay down and opened my camera app, n see that both of my eye’s has heavily bruised blood vessels that are red asf. Here I lifted up my eyelid to get a better view at it
mb it’s kinda nasty but i felt like I should put some kind of proof for the shit I’m saying
Everything done today on death tier sleep n stimulants. While also having a big painful quad bruise from incorrect injection. N i didn’t even mention everything. There’s prob another 5,6 things that happened that I didn’t bring up.
pray for me
