
got.daim
🤍 I love my GF 🤍
- Joined
- Feb 28, 2024
- Posts
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i tried dating recently, thought maybe i was just being negative, maybe i just needed to put myself out there, met a girl, she was nice, said she liked me, said all the stuff i used to want to hear, but it didn’t feel good, it felt off, like i was just playing a role i never auditioned for, like i was pretending to care because i was supposed to, there was no spark, no rush, no butterflies, it just felt mechanical, like we were both trying to convince ourselves it meant something, but it didn’t, i was just going through the motions, smiling at the right time, saying the right things, and in the back of my head all i could think was “this isn’t how it was supposed to happen”, i wasn’t supposed to be this old, this jaded, this numb, it’s like whatever part of me that could fall in love just died from years of rejection and silence, i missed the window where my heart was still soft, now everything just feels like noise, even when it’s good, even when i get what i thought i wanted, it doesn’t fix anything, it doesn’t go back and rewrite the past, and that’s the part no one tells you, you can “heal” and “try again” and “put yourself out there” but sometimes the damage is permanent, sometimes you just don’t come back from it, and the worst part is pretending like you’re okay with that when you’re not