Family? or societal slaves you share your house with?

[Deleted member 155121]

Even the little time where they feel sad angry or tired due to me gives me the ultimate pleasure.Even though all they feel is just a mere freaction of my pain and what they did.I am entirely fucked only,solely because of them.I wasnt ugly nor a antisocial person growing up.But everything they did to me and they dare to look in my face smile laugh act like nothing happened and forget everything.All the screaming,self harm,suicidal attempts,crazy acts and all the times they made fun of me laughing at my face truly a waste of blood,time and waste of sperms.Didnt even teach me basic hygiene rules as a kid.I swear to god i'll make this world hell for them.Just a return for every second of hell they put me in

 

[Deleted member 155121]

Even the little time where they feel sad angry or tired due to me gives me the ultimate pleasure.Even though all they feel is just a mere freaction of my pain and what they did.I am entirely fucked only,solely because of them.I wasnt ugly nor a antisocial person growing up.But everything they did to me and they dare to look in my face smile laugh act like nothing happened and forget everything.All the screaming,self harm,suicidal attempts,crazy acts and all the times they made fun of me laughing at my face truly a waste of blood,time and waste of sperms.Didnt even teach me basic hygiene rules as a kid.I swear to god i'll make this world hell for them.Just a return for every second of hell they put me in

forever damage that will never be fixed

 

[ota.27]

forever damage that will never be fixed

dont do it bro, if you do then how are you any better than them? you'll just end up proving them right, I don't know what they did to you nor do I justify but revenge isn't the way bro. still your life not mine, only giving my opinion

 

[Deleted member 155121]

dont do it bro, if you do then how are you any better than them? you'll just end up proving them right, I don't know what they did to you nor do I justify but revenge isn't the way bro. still your life not mine, only giving my opinion

I am unfixable i have very hard time showing my emotions because i repeatedly got negative feedback from my parents when i showed them as a kid and now im not able to.And all the other things that happened that i cant say i cope with,smoking,alcohol,binging,porn or playing games chatting with online friends.Idk how im gonna reverse this addiction and failure cycle i tried therapy and professional help but it wasnt successfull.Im just lost

 

[ota.27]

I am unfixable i have very hard time showing my emotions because i repeatedly got negative feedback from my parents when i showed them as a kid and now im not able to.And all the other things that happened that i cant say i cope with,smoking,alcohol,binging,porn or playing games chatting with online friends.Idk how im gonna reverse this addiction and failure cycle i tried therapy and professional help but it wasnt successfull.Im just lost

you're not unfixable, keep trying, although your trauma might be really deep I believe you can still live a normal happy life. try professional help again, maybe with different people. you've come this far, don't give up now bro, you're goated