T
theblackestofpills
Banned
- Joined
- Dec 23, 2022
- Posts
- 951
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I'll be a virgin in everyway possible at the age of 20. No kisses, no hugs, no sexual experiences.
It's quite tough to go through this shit and it's honestly suicide fuel guys. As I say, I'm a ticking time bomb waiting to explode.
I've had multiple encounters where I've almost lost my virginity but that was back in my leaner days when I was around 17 - 18.
I'm 6'1, white and often been complimented (when I was lean).
Since I was like 8 years olds, I've been in special educations school and left that at 16.
There were literally only 3 girls there and many many boys. And the 3 girls were out of touch with reality (meaning severely autistic).
I'm mildly autistic but it doesn't affect me in any other way other than socialising really.
I don't look like I have it, I just do.
Even deviating from the normal mind slightly is going to make you appear awkward at the every least and so that's how I feel when I talk to people.
So I left school at 16 and started college and 17. And that's when girls started noticing me, checking me out and even approaching me coldly.
One time I had 2 girls approach me because I was standing there all alone and they were decent as well. So I've had a fair few encounters that almost led to losing my virginity. However I didn't end up losing it.
I live in a shit hole so I just thought that this shit would never work out. And I live with my mom in a shit hole and it sucks.
I'm now 19, and in 6 months I'll be 20.
At 17 my bone structure is nowhere near as good as it is today. I've been mewing for 2 years now and my bone structure is a lot better. I've still got quite a bit of fat to lose as I've picked up weight over the years.
I barely went out either so college was all I really lived for but I don't go there anymore. I just sit at home being a depressed fuck. And I am losing fat by the way. The only thing is that it will take a few months before I get down to a good bodyfat percentage.
But yeah I'm literally a 19 year old virgin and will probably be a virgin in my 20s as well. Being the autistic cunt I am, I do just wait for girls to approach me at times and while it was successful I know that isn't a guarantee.
I'm just so stunted emotionally from having those experiences.
It's genuinely getting harder to deal with by the day and I can't really say when my time will be up if this is all I live for.
It's quite tough to go through this shit and it's honestly suicide fuel guys. As I say, I'm a ticking time bomb waiting to explode.
I've had multiple encounters where I've almost lost my virginity but that was back in my leaner days when I was around 17 - 18.
I'm 6'1, white and often been complimented (when I was lean).
Since I was like 8 years olds, I've been in special educations school and left that at 16.
There were literally only 3 girls there and many many boys. And the 3 girls were out of touch with reality (meaning severely autistic).
I'm mildly autistic but it doesn't affect me in any other way other than socialising really.
I don't look like I have it, I just do.
Even deviating from the normal mind slightly is going to make you appear awkward at the every least and so that's how I feel when I talk to people.
So I left school at 16 and started college and 17. And that's when girls started noticing me, checking me out and even approaching me coldly.
One time I had 2 girls approach me because I was standing there all alone and they were decent as well. So I've had a fair few encounters that almost led to losing my virginity. However I didn't end up losing it.
I live in a shit hole so I just thought that this shit would never work out. And I live with my mom in a shit hole and it sucks.
I'm now 19, and in 6 months I'll be 20.
At 17 my bone structure is nowhere near as good as it is today. I've been mewing for 2 years now and my bone structure is a lot better. I've still got quite a bit of fat to lose as I've picked up weight over the years.
I barely went out either so college was all I really lived for but I don't go there anymore. I just sit at home being a depressed fuck. And I am losing fat by the way. The only thing is that it will take a few months before I get down to a good bodyfat percentage.
But yeah I'm literally a 19 year old virgin and will probably be a virgin in my 20s as well. Being the autistic cunt I am, I do just wait for girls to approach me at times and while it was successful I know that isn't a guarantee.
I'm just so stunted emotionally from having those experiences.
It's genuinely getting harder to deal with by the day and I can't really say when my time will be up if this is all I live for.
