Helicopter parents

[Indiana Evans]

I understand if you have good enough genetics you can "brute force" through everything your helicopter parents do but most people don't have that. Plus if you have helicopter parents in the first place there may be a higher chance that genetically and environmentally you will never reach the state where you can brute force through these hurdles anyway.

Helicopter parents will not let their child have any friends, and will emotionally abuse them more often than non helicopter parents. Although helicopter parents are usually seen to be "invested" in their children, most of them will actually not care for their childs well being unless the child wants to do something such as visit a friend. If so the parent will suddenly want to know everything and give the child a lot of anxiety by making a huge deal out of everything than is transpiring.

When the child pushes back they'll try to justify their behavior by saying they're doing a good thing, and by guilting the child into accepting their help. This is a very bad thing to do as it cripples the childs development. The parent can feel they are a "good parent" while the child suffers.

Eventually when a child of a helicopter parent turns 13-14, their peers are going out on a friday night perhaps, or getting into relationships. The offspring of a helicopter parent will be so damaged they will never conceive of such a thing, and if they ever make plans with a girl then their parents will interfere and make it impossible.

I had helicopter parents growing up. If I went out I would have to tell my parents where I was going and if I did not come back within that time frame they would almost call the police to search for me. If I wanted to go to a mates house, I wouldn't be allowed as my parents would say "we don't know these people". If I wanted to go on a date with a girl, my parents would tell me I had to "study". If a girl wanted to come over, I would be terrified by my helicopter parents interacting with them, or even telling them and it would give me a lot of anxiety.

Helicopter parents can ruin your life, they make you "rot" away by yourself but when you take action they prevent it. Im sure there are people here who have suffered from helicopter parents, or overbearing parents in general to some degree. If you are a teenager, I beg you please rebel more. Your parents won't be there to help you when you have not experienced your youth. If you have helicopter parents its a battle between you and them. If you are a teenager with this issue, just go out, be with girls, go to a ferris wheel, buy her candyfloss, hold her hand or whatever. Don't be like me.

 

[turkproducer]

great thread, i’ll be your saving grace greycel

this is why indians and asians often turn out timid/meek with low self esteem, their parents do not allow them to go and make mistakes and gain some perspective, instead they’re sheltered from being normally socialised

on the other side of the spectrum you have degens encouraging their children to be criminals, ending up in prison by 22 or dead, rotting in some piss ridden street

childhood pill is brutal

 

[Deleted member 3828]

overprotective parents=AIDS
@OldVirgin @TsarTsar444 @Drago Soprano @Scientist

 

[Deleted member 12002]

I understand if you have good enough genetics you can "brute force" through everything your helicopter parents do but most people don't have that. Plus if you have helicopter parents in the first place there may be a higher chance that genetically and environmentally you will never reach the state where you can brute force through these hurdles anyway.

Helicopter parents will not let their child have any friends, and will emotionally abuse them more often than non helicopter parents. Although helicopter parents are usually seen to be "invested" in their children, most of them will actually not care for their childs well being unless the child wants to do something such as visit a friend. If so the parent will suddenly want to know everything and give the child a lot of anxiety by making a huge deal out of everything than is transpiring.

When the child pushes back they'll try to justify their behavior by saying they're doing a good thing, and by guilting the child into accepting their help. This is a very bad thing to do as it cripples the childs development. The parent can feel they are a "good parent" while the child suffers.

Eventually when a child of a helicopter parent turns 13-14, their peers are going out on a friday night perhaps, or getting into relationships. The offspring of a helicopter parent will be so damaged they will never conceive of such a thing, and if they ever make plans with a girl then their parents will interfere and make it impossible.

I had helicopter parents growing up. If I went out I would have to tell my parents where I was going and if I did not come back within that time frame they would almost call the police to search for me. If I wanted to go to a mates house, I wouldn't be allowed as my parents would say "we don't know these people". If I wanted to go on a date with a girl, my parents would tell me I had to "study". If a girl wanted to come over, I would be terrified by my helicopter parents interacting with them, or even telling them and it would give me a lot of anxiety.

Helicopter parents can ruin your life, they make you "rot" away by yourself but when you take action they prevent it. Im sure there are people here who have suffered from helicopter parents, or overbearing parents in general to some degree. If you are a teenager, I beg you please rebel more. Your parents won't be there to help you when you have not experienced your youth. If you have helicopter parents its a battle between you and them. If you are a teenager with this issue, just go out, be with girls, go to a ferris wheel, buy her candyfloss, hold her hand or whatever. Don't be like me.

I can't stand how they pedestalize being a parent. Parenting shouldn't be so deep. It doesn't have to be as complicated as people make it out to be. When it is it messes the kids up, because at that point people start to idealize themselves.

 

[Indiana Evans]

great thread, i’ll be your saving grace greycel

this is why indians and asians often turn out timid/meek with low self esteem, their parents do not allow them to go and make mistakes and gain some perspective, instead they’re sheltered from being normally socialised

on the other side of the spectrum you have degens encouraging their children to be criminals, ending up in prison by 22 or dead, rotting in some piss ridden street

childhood pill is brutal

A balanced approach is best for raising children. You got to set some ground rules of course but not at the expense of their development. Plus if they have a good diet, good environment etc. then that will all take care of itself. The degens encouraging their children to be criminals on the other hand, perhaps they feel like thats their childrens only way to success, or maybe they are retarded. I would have no idea.

overprotective parents=AIDS
@OldVirgin @TsarTsar444 @Drago Soprano @Scientist

One of the worse things you can have

I can't stand how they pedestalize being a parent. Parenting shouldn't be so deep. It doesn't have to be as complicated as people make it out to be. When it is it messes the kids up, because at that point people start to idealize themselves.

Parenting should be on "auto pilot" mode. Once the child is 9-10 you don't have to pester them 24/7. The best parents make their children as independent as possible and help guide them in the right direction rather than the wrong one.

 

[sytyl]

My parents were overprotective of me, I feel it stunted me a bit - with my younger brothers they were way more laisse faire and let them do whatever and no surprise they turn out to be extroverted social butterflies with tons of insta followers/following whereas I barely even have an account.

Parents should let their kids have a good amount of autonomy, laying down consequences for bad actions or steps in the wrong direction without micromanaging.

 

[Deleted member 6403]

this is why indians and asians often turn out timid/meek with low self esteem, their parents do not allow them to go and make mistakes and gain some perspective, instead they’re sheltered from being normally socialised

on the other side of the spectrum you have degens encouraging their children to be criminals, ending up in prison by 22 or dead, rotting in some piss ridden street

JFL, I've been on both sides of the spectrum

back when I lived w my mom, I could leave whenever I wanted, and go wherever I wanted

then moved in w my grandparents in another state, and I could never leave the house, ever, ever

 

[sytyl]

btw OP the only solution if you still feel a bit stunted is to move out asap, ideally change cities completely and force yourself to do stuff, it's hard af at first but you'll catch up

 

[Indiana Evans]

btw OP the only solution if you still feel a bit stunted is to move out asap, ideally change cities completely and force yourself to do stuff, it's hard af at first but you'll catch up

That's a risk if you have been sheltered your whole life like me, and in my experience risks never pay off. In this life you either "got it" or you don't.

 

[.👽.]

yes parents are a big factor in deciding if you are gonna be NT or some home rotting weirdo.
look at all these indians, asians or many ethnic kids in the west. their parents want them to study 24/7 without giving them time to socialize etc.

worst thing is these kids will do good in school etc and the parents think they did a good job, while the kid needs to catch up with his peers

 

[SunniMogger]

Now imagine helicopter Giga religious parents

 

[SunniMogger]

I understand if you have good enough genetics you can "brute force" through everything your helicopter parents do but most people don't have that. Plus if you have helicopter parents in the first place there may be a higher chance that genetically and environmentally you will never reach the state where you can brute force through these hurdles anyway.

Helicopter parents will not let their child have any friends, and will emotionally abuse them more often than non helicopter parents. Although helicopter parents are usually seen to be "invested" in their children, most of them will actually not care for their childs well being unless the child wants to do something such as visit a friend. If so the parent will suddenly want to know everything and give the child a lot of anxiety by making a huge deal out of everything than is transpiring.

When the child pushes back they'll try to justify their behavior by saying they're doing a good thing, and by guilting the child into accepting their help. This is a very bad thing to do as it cripples the childs development. The parent can feel they are a "good parent" while the child suffers.

Eventually when a child of a helicopter parent turns 13-14, their peers are going out on a friday night perhaps, or getting into relationships. The offspring of a helicopter parent will be so damaged they will never conceive of such a thing, and if they ever make plans with a girl then their parents will interfere and make it impossible.

I had helicopter parents growing up. If I went out I would have to tell my parents where I was going and if I did not come back within that time frame they would almost call the police to search for me. If I wanted to go to a mates house, I wouldn't be allowed as my parents would say "we don't know these people". If I wanted to go on a date with a girl, my parents would tell me I had to "study". If a girl wanted to come over, I would be terrified by my helicopter parents interacting with them, or even telling them and it would give me a lot of anxiety.

Helicopter parents can ruin your life, they make you "rot" away by yourself but when you take action they prevent it. Im sure there are people here who have suffered from helicopter parents, or overbearing parents in general to some degree. If you are a teenager, I beg you please rebel more. Your parents won't be there to help you when you have not experienced your youth. If you have helicopter parents its a battle between you and them. If you are a teenager with this issue, just go out, be with girls, go to a ferris wheel, buy her candyfloss, hold her hand or whatever. Don't be like me.

No point rebelling as if I tried to I'd get threats to get kicked out of the house and actually did a couple of times until they called Mr back after a a few hours. The longest they kicked me out for was a day