Help! Easiest things to fake you're sick or injured?

[BigBiceps]

Maybe stomach ache, knee injury or something? What should I lie about, (preferably something the doctor can't prove is a lie, because it'll get me prosecuted). I thought about taking some laxatives for faking diarrhea, but forgot to buy (next holiday for sure).

 

[MansNotHot]

Fake muscle cramps and dizziness

 

[Deleted member 6538]

Pop one fin pill and get an auto immune disease. Ez

 

[Wallenberg]

Movetus is a sign of low T beta cuck.

 

[Baldingman1998]

Just drink 3 gallons of milk + cheese + eggs + honey + 5 carrots + salmon. (I did that unironically because I never get diharrea)
There is a 90% chance to get diharrea from that. + Labni (yogurt I guess?) And chocolate

 

[BigBiceps]

Movetus is a sign of low T beta cuck.

Movetus and slacking off in general is high T alpha male behaviour.

 

[BigBiceps]

Just drink 3 gallons of milk + cheese + eggs + honey + 5 carrots + salmon. (I did that unironically because I never get diharrea)
There is a 90% chance to get diharrea from that. + Labni (yogurt I guess?) And chocolate

Would drink just oil to get diarrhea, but can't get any of that here. Might try to eat too much at dinner and see if I get some kind of stomach aches.

 

[Deleted member 11414]

chug cereal and milk and water and then throw it all up
i used to do it all the time and i'd just stay home playing runescape

 

[Deleted member 12303]

eat curry and say u have diherrah and u will