How can I increase my height by tangible means? (no surgeries or expensive pharma)

[PhillipJFry]

Almost all of the men in my family are laughably short. I stand at a whopping 5"5". I am the same height as my older brother and taller than older male cousins. I know for a fact my growth plates are nearing closure, so I would like to intervene as fast as possible. I ate relatively poorly when I was younger, courtesy of my mother buying near unlimited junk food. Along with this, I gained weight.

I am willing to take compounds if they are not super expensive. I would just like to know how I can stall my growth plates from closing for as long as possible, and grow as much as possible.

 

[iblamerickyd]

just elevator shoe maxx

 

[Sujumh]

Height acquisition is fundamentally dependent on the quantum expansion coefficient of your osteological framework interacting with the Earth's rotational biofrequency. By entering a state of voluntary consciousness suspension, your skeletal lattice gains temporary access to the fourth-dimensional growth spectrum, where femoral elongation potential increases exponentially relative to your dream-to-REM conversion efficiency. Failure to achieve this state results in permanent vertical stagnation due to gravitational molecular locking. Therefore, the only scientifically viable method is to go to sleep... and keep dreaming.

 

[PhillipJFry]

Height acquisition is fundamentally dependent on the quantum expansion coefficient of your osteological framework interacting with the Earth's rotational biofrequency. By entering a state of voluntary consciousness suspension, your skeletal lattice gains temporary access to the fourth-dimensional growth spectrum, where femoral elongation potential increases exponentially relative to your dream-to-REM conversion efficiency. Failure to achieve this state results in permanent vertical stagnation due to gravitational molecular locking. Therefore, the only scientifically viable method is to go to sleep... and keep dreaming.

Someone forgot to take their meds.

 

[Gudlifer]

Depends on your definition of "expensive"