how do I accept that this is my reality forever?

[Orc]

i think some people just aren't built for closeness, not in the way others are, not in the way that lasts

every time i try, every time i let someone in, it starts the same, cautiously hopeful, almost like maybe this time it'll be different, maybe they'll see me, maybe they'll stay,

but they don't

they always pull away, sometimes slowly, sometimes all at once, like they got too close to something they didn't know how to hold

and every time, it hurts a little less on the surface but a little more underneath,
the ache just sinks deeper, until it doesn't even feel like a reaction anymore, it just is, like background noise in my chest that never shuts off

i know i'm intense, i know i say too much, feel too much, want too much, but i don't know how else to be, i've tried being easy, casual, digestible, they still leave, they always leave

i see people who seem to belong to each other, they're not perfect, but they fit, they joke, touch, text back, stay, and i'm always on the outside looking in, like some defective thing, not broken in a way that can be fixed, just made wrong from the start

people say there's someone for everyone, but what if there isn't, what if some of us are just... lids without pots

what if we're the exception to the rule, the ones who make people uncomfortable and don't even know why

i don't want a million friends, i don't want popularity, i just want someone to not get tired of me

someone who sees the weirdness, the intensity, the sadness, and doesn't recoil

but i'm starting to think that person doesn't exist, and if that's true

then what am i supposed to do with the space inside me that's always waiting for someone to fill it?

what do i do with the loneliness that i've built a life around?

i've tried everything, but it always comes down to the same thing, they leave, and i'm left with the same emptiness i started with

how do i stop wanting something i'll never have?

how do i keep going when the silence feels like a wall, and i'm the only one on the other side?

 

[Orc]

just venting by the way this helps to get thoughts out of my head

 

[Newday*V3]

Orc this is a sign to take a copious amount of psychs u are mentalcel

 

[Jonasㅤㅤ⠀]

Hope you'll get well soon

 

[obscuredusk]

daily cup of ropefuel

 

[lestoa]

smoke a blunt and chill boyo

 

[lestoa]

how do i stop wanting something i'll never have?

tl;dr?

 

[ajshabs]

dedicate your life to an extremely dangerous sport so at least you experience some sort of thrill/emotions

 

[Abdullahm06]

i hope you find that person for you one day

 

[e1488shciozl]

just venting by the way this helps to get thoughts out of my head

Its better to vent to ai atp

 

[Metaphysical]

Reading your last few posts is like looking at a mirror.

I have pretty much everything I need to live an amazing life: wealth, height, face, body, etc.

My social status is high, I travel all around the world, and talk to everyone and they do it back. Yet, at the end of the day, it's all just a mask, and a mask that strips away a piece of you each time because you just know it's not the real you.

You go through shadow work, removing your insecurities and accepting them - it works, that's for sure - but all you have now is a brain that malfunctioned before you were even born. Even when I talk to my closest friends I have to set a barrier to prevent them from knowing my true self.

I wouldn't consider myself lonely; in fact, I myself an optimistic person. However, the longer I live this life the dimmer the light of hope that someday someone will truly accept me for who I am will arrive and be a part of my journey.

As a wise person once said, the final stage of the blackpill is the blue pill. We were never fit for this world.

 

[ThraxxGlo]

ive already accepted how my life is going to end up as

 

[flippasav]

You are close to attaining a greek body with a masc GigaChad face tho

 

[MyDreamIsToBe183CM]

g

i think some people just aren't built for closeness, not in the way others are, not in the way that lasts

every time i try, every time i let someone in, it starts the same, cautiously hopeful, almost like maybe this time it'll be different, maybe they'll see me, maybe they'll stay,

but they don't

they always pull away, sometimes slowly, sometimes all at once, like they got too close to something they didn't know how to hold

and every time, it hurts a little less on the surface but a little more underneath,
the ache just sinks deeper, until it doesn't even feel like a reaction anymore, it just is, like background noise in my chest that never shuts off

i know i'm intense, i know i say too much, feel too much, want too much, but i don't know how else to be, i've tried being easy, casual, digestible, they still leave, they always leave

i see people who seem to belong to each other, they're not perfect, but they fit, they joke, touch, text back, stay, and i'm always on the outside looking in, like some defective thing, not broken in a way that can be fixed, just made wrong from the start

people say there's someone for everyone, but what if there isn't, what if some of us are just... lids without pots

what if we're the exception to the rule, the ones who make people uncomfortable and don't even know why

i don't want a million friends, i don't want popularity, i just want someone to not get tired of me

someone who sees the weirdness, the intensity, the sadness, and doesn't recoil

but i'm starting to think that person doesn't exist, and if that's true

then what am i supposed to do with the space inside me that's always waiting for someone to fill it?

what do i do with the loneliness that i've built a life around?

i've tried everything, but it always comes down to the same thing, they leave, and i'm left with the same emptiness i started with

how do i stop wanting something i'll never have?

how do i keep going when the silence feels like a wall, and i'm the only one on the other side?

U broke yo with ur partner?

 

[Changmentum]

NTpill and the traumapill are the most brutal pills man

 

[Changmentum]

You are close to attaining a greek body with a masc GigaChad face tho

Even Chad can’t escape NTpill

 

[Franco.]

Reading your last few posts is like looking at a mirror.

I have pretty much everything I need to live an amazing life: wealth, height, face, body, etc.

My social status is high, I travel all around the world, and talk to everyone and they do it back. Yet, at the end of the day, it's all just a mask, and a mask that strips away a piece of you each time because you just know it's not the real you.

You go through shadow work, removing your insecurities and accepting them - it works, that's for sure - but all you have now is a brain that malfunctioned before you were even born. Even when I talk to my closest friends I have to set a barrier to prevent them from knowing my true self.

I wouldn't consider myself lonely; in fact, I myself an optimistic person. However, the longer I live this life the dimmer the light of hope that someday someone will truly accept me for who I am will arrive and be a part of my journey.

As a wise person once said, the final stage of the blackpill is the blue pill. We were never fit for this world.

aura farming profile

 

[flippasav]

Even Chad can’t escape NTpill

No face for your social skills
Brutal

 

[e1488shciozl]

i think some people just aren't built for closeness, not in the way others are, not in the way that lasts

every time i try, every time i let someone in, it starts the same, cautiously hopeful, almost like maybe this time it'll be different, maybe they'll see me, maybe they'll stay,

but they don't

they always pull away, sometimes slowly, sometimes all at once, like they got too close to something they didn't know how to hold

and every time, it hurts a little less on the surface but a little more underneath,
the ache just sinks deeper, until it doesn't even feel like a reaction anymore, it just is, like background noise in my chest that never shuts off

i know i'm intense, i know i say too much, feel too much, want too much, but i don't know how else to be, i've tried being easy, casual, digestible, they still leave, they always leave

i see people who seem to belong to each other, they're not perfect, but they fit, they joke, touch, text back, stay, and i'm always on the outside looking in, like some defective thing, not broken in a way that can be fixed, just made wrong from the start

people say there's someone for everyone, but what if there isn't, what if some of us are just... lids without pots

what if we're the exception to the rule, the ones who make people uncomfortable and don't even know why

i don't want a million friends, i don't want popularity, i just want someone to not get tired of me

someone who sees the weirdness, the intensity, the sadness, and doesn't recoil

but i'm starting to think that person doesn't exist, and if that's true

then what am i supposed to do with the space inside me that's always waiting for someone to fill it?

what do i do with the loneliness that i've built a life around?

i've tried everything, but it always comes down to the same thing, they leave, and i'm left with the same emptiness i started with

how do i stop wanting something i'll never have?

how do i keep going when the silence feels like a wall, and i'm the only one on the other side?

Philoso poetical yn

 

[e1488shciozl]

i see people who seem to belong to each other, they're not perfect, but they fit, they joke, touch

I can touch u as much as u want and anywhere u want. Im ok with that

 

[playxiing]

Hope you'll get well soon

it will never tbh

 

[MyDreamIsToBe183CM]

Hope you'll get well soon

Pepe so fat he’s not holing a heart he’s in a blanket and you can see his slabs of fat and gyno

 

[¿Nero]

i think some people just aren't built for closeness, not in the way others are, not in the way that lasts

every time i try, every time i let someone in, it starts the same, cautiously hopeful, almost like maybe this time it'll be different, maybe they'll see me, maybe they'll stay,

but they don't

they always pull away, sometimes slowly, sometimes all at once, like they got too close to something they didn't know how to hold

and every time, it hurts a little less on the surface but a little more underneath,
the ache just sinks deeper, until it doesn't even feel like a reaction anymore, it just is, like background noise in my chest that never shuts off

i know i'm intense, i know i say too much, feel too much, want too much, but i don't know how else to be, i've tried being easy, casual, digestible, they still leave, they always leave

i see people who seem to belong to each other, they're not perfect, but they fit, they joke, touch, text back, stay, and i'm always on the outside looking in, like some defective thing, not broken in a way that can be fixed, just made wrong from the start

people say there's someone for everyone, but what if there isn't, what if some of us are just... lids without pots

what if we're the exception to the rule, the ones who make people uncomfortable and don't even know why

i don't want a million friends, i don't want popularity, i just want someone to not get tired of me

someone who sees the weirdness, the intensity, the sadness, and doesn't recoil

but i'm starting to think that person doesn't exist, and if that's true

then what am i supposed to do with the space inside me that's always waiting for someone to fill it?

what do i do with the loneliness that i've built a life around?

i've tried everything, but it always comes down to the same thing, they leave, and i'm left with the same emptiness i started with

how do i stop wanting something i'll never have?

how do i keep going when the silence feels like a wall, and i'm the only one on the other side?

That’s sad orc. If even someone as beautiful as you can’t get women it’s over. If I was you I’d start reading and approaching women especially romance books or movies since every time they leave they take some love from you. Even though it won’t fix the whole in your heart.

 

[JohnDoe]

Go meet up with @Gengar you can talk about any subject you want

 

[JohnDoe]

That’s sad orc. If even someone as beautiful as you can’t get women it’s over. If I was you I’d start reading and approaching women especially romance books or movies since every time they leave they take some love from you. Even though it won’t fix the whole in your heart.

Pretty sure he can get women but he lacks a connection or emotional intimacy. Whether it's due to autism or ND/NON-NT thought process, who knows. Could be most normies are soulless so no surprise he can't relate. Orc needs a wife and to have some kids, that will sort him out.

 

[¿Nero]

Pretty sure he can get women but he lacks a connection or emotional intimacy. Whether it's due to autism or ND/NON-NT thought process, who knows. Could be most normies are soulless so no surprise he can't relate. Orc needs a wife and to have some kids, that will sort him out.

I Hope Chad Orc finds love
I wish him the best

 

[ThugggButt]

i think some people just aren't built for closeness, not in the way others are, not in the way that lasts

every time i try, every time i let someone in, it starts the same, cautiously hopeful, almost like maybe this time it'll be different, maybe they'll see me, maybe they'll stay,

but they don't

they always pull away, sometimes slowly, sometimes all at once, like they got too close to something they didn't know how to hold

and every time, it hurts a little less on the surface but a little more underneath,
the ache just sinks deeper, until it doesn't even feel like a reaction anymore, it just is, like background noise in my chest that never shuts off

i know i'm intense, i know i say too much, feel too much, want too much, but i don't know how else to be, i've tried being easy, casual, digestible, they still leave, they always leave

i see people who seem to belong to each other, they're not perfect, but they fit, they joke, touch, text back, stay, and i'm always on the outside looking in, like some defective thing, not broken in a way that can be fixed, just made wrong from the start

people say there's someone for everyone, but what if there isn't, what if some of us are just... lids without pots

what if we're the exception to the rule, the ones who make people uncomfortable and don't even know why

i don't want a million friends, i don't want popularity, i just want someone to not get tired of me

someone who sees the weirdness, the intensity, the sadness, and doesn't recoil

but i'm starting to think that person doesn't exist, and if that's true

then what am i supposed to do with the space inside me that's always waiting for someone to fill it?

what do i do with the loneliness that i've built a life around?

i've tried everything, but it always comes down to the same thing, they leave, and i'm left with the same emptiness i started with

how do i stop wanting something i'll never have?

how do i keep going when the silence feels like a wall, and i'm the only one on the other side?

are you kind?

 

[Orc]

smoke a blunt and chill boyo

I have cannabis-associated hypersensitivity pneumonitis, I'm currently in week two of recovering from it after smoking a single pure joint, it makes me cough all day and my lungs are filled with fluid.

g

U broke yo with ur partner?

sadly, I didn't want to let go, I didn't want it to end.

That’s sad orc. If even someone as beautiful as you can’t get women it’s over. If I was you I’d start reading and approaching women especially romance books or movies since every time they leave they take some love from you. Even though it won’t fix the whole in your heart.

I don't have issues getting women, but i have no interest in dating people i can't relate to, and i can't relate to women

 

[MyDreamIsToBe183CM]

I have cannabis-associated hypersensitivity pneumonitis, I'm currently in week two of recovering from it after smoking a single pure joint, it makes me cough all day and my lungs are filled with fluid.


sadly, I didn't want to let go, I didn't want it to end.


I don't have issues getting women, but i have no interest in dating people i can't relate to, and i can't relate to women

Damn bruh I thought you guys wrre
Locked in

Brutal shiet hope it gets bettr

 

[Orc]

Damn bruh I thought you guys wrre
Locked in

Brutal shiet hope it gets bettr

nothing ever gets better it just gets worse

 

[MyDreamIsToBe183CM]

nothing ever gets better it just gets worse

White pill maxx the

 

[lookingforward]

I think this is what life is about , I also feel like a background thought in most women’s head but it’s about finding someone who will love you for you the 100% unfiltered raw you.

Finding the person that will love you for you is what this whole club is about I’ve felt like a spectator my whole life from club love too it seems like such a distant place I will only ever see from afar no matter how many women im with.

Either that or dating is a Jewish psyop to make young men think there’s a “one” when hypergamy and nature remain king

 

[Crusile]

It sounds like you have a personality disorder

 

[1966Ford]

I'm trying to accept that I will be alone forever, die alone, eat alone, and rot alone.

 

[Neucher]

how do i stop wanting something i'll never have?

This has to be without a doubt the worst thing in life

 

[Hernan]

i'll tell you, do dumb shit. go kayaking again you, have fun matey.

 

[Klasik616]

Only become friends with handsome people

 

[iblamemandible7]

Damn hits close to home brutal

 

[Surfsup]

JFL

 

[BigJimsWornOutTires]

i think some people just aren't built for closeness, not in the way others are, not in the way that lasts

every time i try, every time i let someone in, it starts the same, cautiously hopeful, almost like maybe this time it'll be different, maybe they'll see me, maybe they'll stay,

but they don't

they always pull away, sometimes slowly, sometimes all at once, like they got too close to something they didn't know how to hold

and every time, it hurts a little less on the surface but a little more underneath,
the ache just sinks deeper, until it doesn't even feel like a reaction anymore, it just is, like background noise in my chest that never shuts off

i know i'm intense, i know i say too much, feel too much, want too much, but i don't know how else to be, i've tried being easy, casual, digestible, they still leave, they always leave

i see people who seem to belong to each other, they're not perfect, but they fit, they joke, touch, text back, stay, and i'm always on the outside looking in, like some defective thing, not broken in a way that can be fixed, just made wrong from the start

people say there's someone for everyone, but what if there isn't, what if some of us are just... lids without pots

what if we're the exception to the rule, the ones who make people uncomfortable and don't even know why

i don't want a million friends, i don't want popularity, i just want someone to not get tired of me

someone who sees the weirdness, the intensity, the sadness, and doesn't recoil

but i'm starting to think that person doesn't exist, and if that's true

then what am i supposed to do with the space inside me that's always waiting for someone to fill it?

what do i do with the loneliness that i've built a life around?

i've tried everything, but it always comes down to the same thing, they leave, and i'm left with the same emptiness i started with

how do i stop wanting something i'll never have?

how do i keep going when the silence feels like a wall, and i'm the only one on the other side?

Whine, whine, whine, here:

 

[sluttysuzy420]

just venting by the way this helps to get thoughts out of my head

seems like u want someone to understand you and not run away. As someone who masks alot, i think u should accpet who u r is fundamentally fucked and in order to win the favou of people around u u need to fraud. In essence this is what looksmaxing s trying to improve upon an original part of youself till u bear still resemblance to the former.

 

[Vermilioncore]

13 reasons why ah

 

[InanimatePragmatist]

i think some people just aren't built for closeness, not in the way others are, not in the way that lasts

every time i try, every time i let someone in, it starts the same, cautiously hopeful, almost like maybe this time it'll be different, maybe they'll see me, maybe they'll stay,

but they don't

they always pull away, sometimes slowly, sometimes all at once, like they got too close to something they didn't know how to hold

and every time, it hurts a little less on the surface but a little more underneath,
the ache just sinks deeper, until it doesn't even feel like a reaction anymore, it just is, like background noise in my chest that never shuts off

i know i'm intense, i know i say too much, feel too much, want too much, but i don't know how else to be, i've tried being easy, casual, digestible, they still leave, they always leave

i see people who seem to belong to each other, they're not perfect, but they fit, they joke, touch, text back, stay, and i'm always on the outside looking in, like some defective thing, not broken in a way that can be fixed, just made wrong from the start

people say there's someone for everyone, but what if there isn't, what if some of us are just... lids without pots

what if we're the exception to the rule, the ones who make people uncomfortable and don't even know why

i don't want a million friends, i don't want popularity, i just want someone to not get tired of me

someone who sees the weirdness, the intensity, the sadness, and doesn't recoil

but i'm starting to think that person doesn't exist, and if that's true

then what am i supposed to do with the space inside me that's always waiting for someone to fill it?

what do i do with the loneliness that i've built a life around?

i've tried everything, but it always comes down to the same thing, they leave, and i'm left with the same emptiness i started with

how do i stop wanting something i'll never have?

how do i keep going when the silence feels like a wall, and i'm the only one on the other side?

You just do. Let go attachment, let go of everything but self gain.

 

[Haseeb]

i think some people just aren't built for closeness, not in the way others are, not in the way that lasts

every time i try, every time i let someone in, it starts the same, cautiously hopeful, almost like maybe this time it'll be different, maybe they'll see me, maybe they'll stay,

but they don't

they always pull away, sometimes slowly, sometimes all at once, like they got too close to something they didn't know how to hold

and every time, it hurts a little less on the surface but a little more underneath,
the ache just sinks deeper, until it doesn't even feel like a reaction anymore, it just is, like background noise in my chest that never shuts off

i know i'm intense, i know i say too much, feel too much, want too much, but i don't know how else to be, i've tried being easy, casual, digestible, they still leave, they always leave

i see people who seem to belong to each other, they're not perfect, but they fit, they joke, touch, text back, stay, and i'm always on the outside looking in, like some defective thing, not broken in a way that can be fixed, just made wrong from the start

people say there's someone for everyone, but what if there isn't, what if some of us are just... lids without pots

what if we're the exception to the rule, the ones who make people uncomfortable and don't even know why

i don't want a million friends, i don't want popularity, i just want someone to not get tired of me

someone who sees the weirdness, the intensity, the sadness, and doesn't recoil

but i'm starting to think that person doesn't exist, and if that's true

then what am i supposed to do with the space inside me that's always waiting for someone to fill it?

what do i do with the loneliness that i've built a life around?

i've tried everything, but it always comes down to the same thing, they leave, and i'm left with the same emptiness i started with

how do i stop wanting something i'll never have?

how do i keep going when the silence feels like a wall, and i'm the only one on the other side?

i didn't know you were transitioning

 

[looks>books]

i think some people just aren't built for closeness, not in the way others are, not in the way that lasts

every time i try, every time i let someone in, it starts the same, cautiously hopeful, almost like maybe this time it'll be different, maybe they'll see me, maybe they'll stay,

but they don't

they always pull away, sometimes slowly, sometimes all at once, like they got too close to something they didn't know how to hold

and every time, it hurts a little less on the surface but a little more underneath,
the ache just sinks deeper, until it doesn't even feel like a reaction anymore, it just is, like background noise in my chest that never shuts off

i know i'm intense, i know i say too much, feel too much, want too much, but i don't know how else to be, i've tried being easy, casual, digestible, they still leave, they always leave

i see people who seem to belong to each other, they're not perfect, but they fit, they joke, touch, text back, stay, and i'm always on the outside looking in, like some defective thing, not broken in a way that can be fixed, just made wrong from the start

people say there's someone for everyone, but what if there isn't, what if some of us are just... lids without pots

what if we're the exception to the rule, the ones who make people uncomfortable and don't even know why

i don't want a million friends, i don't want popularity, i just want someone to not get tired of me

someone who sees the weirdness, the intensity, the sadness, and doesn't recoil

but i'm starting to think that person doesn't exist, and if that's true

then what am i supposed to do with the space inside me that's always waiting for someone to fill it?

what do i do with the loneliness that i've built a life around?

i've tried everything, but it always comes down to the same thing, they leave, and i'm left with the same emptiness i started with

how do i stop wanting something i'll never have?

how do i keep going when the silence feels like a wall, and i'm the only one on the other side?

Hello orc i can help

I am also on the spectrum and im currently helping someone else whos on it.

When you say your autism gets in the way, what do you mean?

 

[Bitchwhipper2]

Aurismpill