jotunnr
The Infamous
- Joined
- Mar 27, 2026
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❖ EMERGENCY DEBLOAT PROTOCOL ❖
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Got a function in 2 hours and you're bloated af? Furo not getting the job done on its own?
Lock the fuck in and peep game rq.
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STEP 1: 200–300MG MODAFINIL
Modafinil acts as a significant central nervous system stimulant. It increases synaptic levels of norepinephrine and dopamine while suppressing GABA signaling.
This is going to be especially important because Modafinil causes your core body temperature to elevate, which then activates your sweat glands for aggressive sweating.
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STEP 2: 40MG FUROSEMIDE
Pretty self-explanatory loop diuretic. Causes you to flush out the majority of systemic extracellular water, but works continuously over a delayed window. It ensures your body doesn't re-compensate fluid holding or spike your blood pressure during your night out.
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STEP 3: 2 RED L&M CIGARETTES
The nicotine provides an immediate adrenaline release and triggers vasoconstriction + sweating. When combined with Modafinil, you are essentially BEGGING your body to dump excess subcutaneous water.
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STEP 4: 30-MIN SAUNA + LIGHT 5–10 MINUTE WALK
Walk the distance from your house to the sauna. If the stimulant-nicotine stack didn't force enough sweating, the sauna will completely strip whatever residual fluid is left under your skin.
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POST-EVENT RECOVERY
After you return home from the function:
- Swallow an intense dose of broad-spectrum electrolytes.
- Drink a LOT of plain water immediately.
- Rest completely—do NOT exert yourself any further physically.
- Eat a banana or a baked potato or some shit.
Older photo because i haven't gone to any functions in a while (any deserving functions at that). Probably the most debloated I've ever been
Good luck
