OrbitMax
Gold
- Joined
- Mar 31, 2026
- Posts
- 926
- Reputation
- 716
THE SOCIAL LADDER: HUMAN NATURE, FRIENDSHIP, STATUS AND INFLUENCE (simple thread might go in higher detail if wanted)
Most people misunderstand social life.They either believe everything is about looks and status, or they believe everyone will like you if you are just “yourself” and a good person.
Both views are incomplete.
Looks matter. Height, facial attractiveness, grooming, clothing, body language, money, confidence, and social position all affect first impressions. Pretending otherwise is childish.
But the mistake is assuming that your first impression completely determines your social life. It does not. It determines how much resistance you face at the beginning.
An attractive person may receive more positive assumptions before speaking. A socially awkward attractive person can still become annoying, insecure, or isolated. An average-looking person with good social instincts can become respected, liked, and well-connected. Someone with poor social instincts can destroy advantages that they already have.
The real game begins after the first impression.
People are constantly asking themselves, usually without realizing it:
- Is this person socially accepted?
- Is he confident or desperate?
- Is he safe to be around?
- Is he interesting?
- Does he have a life outside of me?
- Will being associated with him help or hurt my position?
- Does he make me feel good about myself?
- Is he trying too hard?
- Is he a threat to my status?
- Can I trust him?
People do not automatically reward the “nicest” person. They respond to what they experience around you.
That is the foundation of the social ladder.
The social ladder is not one universal ranking.
You can be respected at the gym and ignored at school. You can be popular online and socially invisible in real life. You can be the funny person in one friend group and the quiet outsider in another.
Every environment has its own currency.
It all depends on the group and what you are looking for. Aligned there values with yours. What they like is what you like. Now i would recommend doing research on the group of friends you want to join before joining. Now i am not saying to go stalk them; however, find out their interests and study them. You want to do this to look not like a loser but also similar to them. Humans are often confronted by similarity. Its inportant to know what the group values before you attempt to join.
A common mistake is entering a group and immediately trying to impress everyone. This usually creates the opposite effect. You look like you are auditioning for a position. People are smarter than you assume. THEY SEE THROUGH YOUR DESPERATION, so don't have it. Even if deep down you do remember, you want friends, not someone to cuck to.
People can sense when someone wants approval from them.
You do not need to announce that you are confident. You need to behave like your entire self-worth is not dependent on how the room reacts to you.
That does not mean acting arrogant. It means not treating every conversation like a performance.
A person with genuine social confidence can survive a boring interaction, a failed joke, a disagreement, or a cold response without emotionally collapsing.
That is one of the biggest differences between confidence and non confidence. I know its hard but the good thing is that no one has to know you lack confiendence as long as as you protray it. They say the loudest person in the room is the least confident. I am the embodiment of that statement but i have many connections. This leads me to my secound point,
You can be respected at the gym and ignored at school. You can be popular online and socially invisible in real life. You can be the funny person in one friend group and the quiet outsider in another.
Every environment has its own currency.
It all depends on the group and what you are looking for. Aligned there values with yours. What they like is what you like. Now i would recommend doing research on the group of friends you want to join before joining. Now i am not saying to go stalk them; however, find out their interests and study them. You want to do this to look not like a loser but also similar to them. Humans are often confronted by similarity. Its inportant to know what the group values before you attempt to join.
A common mistake is entering a group and immediately trying to impress everyone. This usually creates the opposite effect. You look like you are auditioning for a position. People are smarter than you assume. THEY SEE THROUGH YOUR DESPERATION, so don't have it. Even if deep down you do remember, you want friends, not someone to cuck to.
People can sense when someone wants approval from them.
You do not need to announce that you are confident. You need to behave like your entire self-worth is not dependent on how the room reacts to you.
That does not mean acting arrogant. It means not treating every conversation like a performance.
A person with genuine social confidence can survive a boring interaction, a failed joke, a disagreement, or a cold response without emotionally collapsing.
That is one of the biggest differences between confidence and non confidence. I know its hard but the good thing is that no one has to know you lack confiendence as long as as you protray it. They say the loudest person in the room is the least confident. I am the embodiment of that statement but i have many connections. This leads me to my secound point,
lYou don't have confidence nor charima otherwise you wouldn't be on this thread. The good news is you don't have to the first thing you will do with your newfound friendship is put a gun to your skull and blow out your ideas, thoughts, and beliefs. The first few weeks is the most fragil portion and maybe arwkward part of your friendship. To combat this you will not speak about yourself or rarely. Don't look retarded however, using physcology we can effectively become whoever we want to be to do this, you will have your friend talk about themselfs for the most part. The secret here is that everyone loves boosting/talking about themselves to others by constanly giving him/her that dopamine hit of talking about thwmslefs they will subconsciously associate that feeling with you.
The worlds greatest suducer (Giovanni Battista Casanova) is exemplified in The 48 Laws of power by Robert Greene for his suductive persona and way with the ladies lol. When around him, ladies describe feeling drunk around him even without taking a single sip of alcohol (he didn't drug them) how is this possible? By having the people around you in a contant state of eupohria. Let your guard down. You so nervous on saying the right thing and doing the right thing or trying to make them laugh that you have forgotten the point of a frienship. PEACE every person has struggles; some you see and others you don't so its important to have that beam of radiant relaxation around yourself so that others feel it too. This might sound gay but it works. Don't be yourself cause that's just trash advice but be someone that you can toggle on and off by which you can adampt to each person and reflect what they don't have. Humans are attracted to our opposites or things we do not have.
In ancient Greece, philosophy was everywhere, with ideas constantly being chalanged we as humans came up with the three categories of friendship. THE FRIEND OF NEED. This is a friendship based off of transaction. Your friend with the mechanic because he will fix your car for free type friendship. Now, this friendship is useful when in need but, when it's no longer needed, as Aristotle said, it breaks apart. FRIEND BASED OFF OF ENJOYEMENT. This friendship is mostly seen in schools; it's where you are only friends with someone because you like doing the same thing (this is your goal for now). Aristotle said that this friendship is fleeting because you will soon not have the same enjoyments as the other person, and the friendship will die. FRIENDSHIP OF VIRTUE. This is the highest from of friendship, which is your friendship with this person because you genuinely respect them and admire them.
IF INTRESTED IL GO IN A DEEPER DIVE IN A BIGGER THREAD
Yes i wrote this i was bored and its 1 am
IF INTRESTED IL GO IN A DEEPER DIVE IN A BIGGER THREAD
Yes i wrote this i was bored and its 1 am
