HOW TO MAKE MAD MAD MONEH !! [BEGINNER STRATEGIES GTFIH]

loyolaxavvierretard

loyolaxavvierretard

𝕯𝖝𝕯 𝖈𝖗𝖊𝖜 . Alonso
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HAVE YOU EVER WISHED TO FEEL THE HIGHS OF EXECUTING SELL ORDERS AND BOOK PROFITS ?

HAVE YOU EVER WISHED THAT YOU WANT TO BE THE GUY WHO SMOKES CIGARS AND DOES COCAINE WHILE CHOOSING CALLS ?

YOU HAVE COME TO RIGHT PLACE !! IN THIS GLORIOUS GUIDE I WILL TEACH YOU HOW TO MAKE MAD MAD MONEY WITHIN DAYS !! YES, YOU HEARD THAT RIGHT RETARDS, DAAYS !!



INTRODUCTION
THE FIRST THING YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND WHAT A TRADER ACTUALLY IS. IT CAN BE PERFECTLY SUMMARISED USING THIS IMAGE
copied-from-somewhere-p-v0-ucv6h62dg7md1.jpeg





THIS GUIDE IS BULLSHIT


  • IN THIS GUIDE I WILL SHARE SERIOUS 5 TRADING STRATEGIES THAT WORK SURPRISINGLY WELL. YOU CAN TRY IT OUT FOR YOURSELF AND CHECK IT OUT
  • AS FOR THE NON SERIOUS FORMAT. GET USED TO IT REGARD. YOU ARE HERE TO LEARN HOW TO MAKE MONEY LIKE A HEDGE FUND, NOT TO SPAM DNRD CONSTANTLY.




LET'S BEGIN !!



1. SELL IN MAY GO AWAY

METHOD = STAY INVESTED IN MARKET FROM NOVEMBER 1ST TO APRIL 30TH. THEN FROM MAY 1ST TO OCTOBER 31ST YOU TURN YOUR
INVESTMENTS TO CASH OR BONDS. REPEAT THIS CYCLE YEAR BY YEAR AND WATCH THE PROFITS FILL THE ACCOUNT.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500 - NOV-APR AVG RETURN = 7.5% (1950-2023)
MAY-OCT AVG RETURN = 2.2% (1950-2023)

WHY IT WORKS = EARNINGS SEASON HAS BONUSES HENCE MORE BUYING IN WINTER. SUMMER SEASON HAS RELATIVELY LESS VOLUME IN TRADING ERGO LOW INVESTOR ATTENTION.


RISK = LOW VOLATILITY BUT GAINS WILL BE LOST IN SUMMER.


2. THE FIRST FIVE DAYS OF JANUARY

METHOD = OBSERVE THE FIRST 5 DAYS OF JANUARY. IF THE INDEX IS POSITIVE THEN UNLOAD ALL YOUR NANA'S SAVINGS INTO THE INDEX
AND HODL (YES IT IS CALLED HODL NOT HOLD) FOR A YEAR.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500. - 80% CHANCE OF THE INDEX HAVING A POSITIVE YEAR IF FIRST 5 DAYS ARE GREEN.
AVG RETURN IN POSITIVE YEARS = 13.5%
IF 5 DAYS ARE NEGATIVE THEN CHANCE OF YEAR ENDING POSITIVE = 60%

WHY IT WORKS = JANUARY REFLECTS THE POSITION OF THE INSTITUTIONS FOR A YEAR. IF JANUARY POSITIVE THEN YEAR POSITIVE.

RISK = VERY LOW AS EVIDENCED.


3. SMALL CAP MOONSHOTS IN JANUARY

METHOD = BUY SMALL CAP STOCKS IN LATE DECEMBER AND SELL THEM BY END OF JANUARY. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED TO DO AFTER A DISAPPOINTING DECEMBER.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500 = OUTPERFORMS LARGE CAP STOCKS BY 1-2%. REMEMBER THE NUMBER MAY BE SMALL BUT IT IS IN THE CONTEXT OF OUTPERFORMING LARGE CAPS WHICH OUTPERFORM S&P SO FACTOR THAT IN.

WHY IT WORKS = TAX LOSS HARVESTING IN DECEMBER TANKS SMALL CAP VALUE. BUT THE SURGE IN JANUARY IS CREATED DUE TO INCREASED UPSIDE PRESSURE BECAUSE OF RESCALING AND REBALANCING.

RISK = HIGH BECAUSE YOU ARE PLAYING WITH FIRE WHEN INVESTING IN SMALL CAP BUT IT IS STILL FAIRLY RELIABLE FOR A SMALL CAP STRATEGY


4. TURN OF THE MONTH EFFECT

METHOD = BUY S&P 500 AT THE CLOSE ON THE LAST TRADING DAY OF THE MONTH. SELL ON THE 5TH TRADING DAY OF THE NEW UPCOMING MONTH.




PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P 500 = 90% OF ALL GAINS ARE MADE IN THIS SHORT WINDOW BETWEEN THE MONTHS. THIS WAS TAKEN FROM DATA FROM 1990-2019 SO A BIG SAMPLE SIZE. THIS INCLUDES ALL TRADING ACTIVITIES.





WHY IT WORKS = SALARY AND PENSIONS INFLOW AT THE START OF THE MONTH SO BUYING PRESSURE STARTS SHOWING EFFECT. FUND MANAGERS ALSO REPOSITION THEIR INVESTMENTS MONTHLY ADDING TO THE ALREADY EXISTING PRESSURE.



RISK = VERY LOW SINCE 90% OF ALL GAINS COME HERE. HOWEVER FOR TOP RETURNS THE CAPITAL MUST BE SIZEABLE. THIS IS GUARANTEED GAIN MACHINE.





5. BELIVE IT OR NOT CALLS !!



METHOD = THIS IS FOR SPECIAL OCCASIONS LIKE A BOTTLE OF WINE. WHENEVER THE INDEXES FALL 2% OR MORE IN THE SAME DAY HIT THE BUY BUTTON LIKE YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT WHEN THE MARKET CLOSES THE SAME DAY. HODL FOR ATLEAST 7 DAYS. REAP PROFITS.



PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P 500 - AVG 7 DAY RETURN AFTER A -2% SINGLE DAY DIP = 1.2% (ABSOULTELY HUGE)



WHY IT WORKS = MEAN REVERSION BASICALLY. IT BRINGS PRICES UP AGAIN SINCE THE MARKET IS THEORITICALLY RATIONAL. ALSO MARKET TEND TO OVERREACT SHORT TERM CAUSING PANIC AND ERGO CREATE SHORT TERM OPPORTUNITY.



RISK = HIGH. IF YOU ARE UNLUCKY, YOU MAY HAVE BOUGHT INTO A BEAR MARKET. THE REWARDS ARE WORTH IT AS MENTIONED ABOVE. ONLY USE IT ONCE IN A BLUE MOON.



THESE STRATEGIES ARE MEANT TO BE USED EXACTLY AS PRESENT HERE. USING THESE CONSISTENTLY OVER A PERIOD OF TIME CAN REAP A SIGNIFICANT AMOUNT OF PROFITS. A REGARD SHOULD ALWAYS BE DISCIPLINED.

FINAL EDIT = YOUR CAPITAL SHOULD BE BIG TO MAKE SERIOUS GAINS. CANT PUT 10 DOLLARS AND EXPECT MILLIONS. GRIFTERS HAVE BETTER GUIDES ON HOW TO GRIFT IF YOU WANT THAT.



@Gaygymmaxx @chudlite @Zagro @Snicket @Volksstaffel



















 
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Why not just rug little niggers?
 
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Wow amazing thread i read every molecule :feelsyay:
 
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@vidit @IOS @mtn/zygos @Chadeep @the_machinist_786

The title and the beginning may seem scammy, but please bear with it. There are some basic strategies mentioned there. I wanted to make a meme but actually stumbled into a guide
 
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HAVE YOU EVER WISHED TO FEEL THE HIGHS OF EXECUTING SELL ORDERS AND BOOK PROFITS ?

HAVE YOU EVER WISHED THAT YOU WANT TO BE THE GUY WHO SMOKES CIGARS AND DOES COCAINE WHILE CHOOSING CALLS ?

YOU HAVE COME TO RIGHT PLACE !! IN THIS GLORIOUS GUIDE I WILL TEACH YOU HOW TO MAKE MAD MAD MONEY WITHIN DAYS !! YES, YOU HEARD THAT RIGHT RETARDS, DAAYS !!



INTRODUCTION
THE FIRST THING YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND WHAT A TRADER ACTUALLY IS. IT CAN BE PERFECTLY SUMMARISED USING THIS IMAGE
copied-from-somewhere-p-v0-ucv6h62dg7md1.jpeg





THIS GUIDE IS BULLSHIT


  • IN THIS GUIDE I WILL SHARE SERIOUS 5 TRADING STRATEGIES THAT WORK SURPRISINGLY WELL. YOU CAN TRY IT OUT FOR YOURSELF AND CHECK IT OUT
  • AS FOR THE NON SERIOUS FORMAT. GET USED TO IT REGARD. YOU ARE HERE TO LEARN HOW TO MAKE MONEY LIKE A HEDGE FUND, NOT TO SPAM DNRD CONSTANTLY.




LET'S BEGIN !!



1. SELL IN MAY GO AWAY

METHOD = STAY INVESTED IN MARKET FROM NOVEMBER 1ST TO APRIL 30TH. THEN FROM MAY 1ST TO OCTOBER 31ST YOU TURN YOUR
INVESTMENTS TO CASH OR BONDS. REPEAT THIS CYCLE YEAR BY YEAR AND WATCH THE PROFITS FILL THE ACCOUNT.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500 - NOV-APR AVG RETURN = 7.5% (1950-2023)
MAY-OCT AVG RETURN = 2.2% (1950-2023)

WHY IT WORKS = EARNINGS SEASON HAS BONUSES HENCE MORE BUYING IN WINTER. SUMMER SEASON HAS RELATIVELY LESS VOLUME IN TRADING ERGO LOW INVESTOR ATTENTION.


RISK = LOW VOLATILITY BUT GAINS WILL BE LOST IN SUMMER.


2. THE FIRST FIVE DAYS OF JANUARY

METHOD = OBSERVE THE FIRST 5 DAYS OF JANUARY. IF THE INDEX IS POSITIVE THEN UNLOAD ALL YOUR NANA'S SAVINGS INTO THE INDEX
AND HODL (YES IT IS CALLED HODL NOT HOLD) FOR A YEAR.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500. - 80% CHANCE OF THE INDEX HAVING A POSITIVE YEAR IF FIRST 5 DAYS ARE GREEN.
AVG RETURN IN POSITIVE YEARS = 13.5%
IF 5 DAYS ARE NEGATIVE THEN CHANCE OF YEAR ENDING POSITIVE = 60%

WHY IT WORKS = JANUARY REFLECTS THE POSITION OF THE INSTITUTIONS FOR A YEAR. IF JANUARY POSITIVE THEN YEAR POSITIVE.

RISK = VERY LOW AS EVIDENCED.


3. SMALL CAP MOONSHOTS IN JANUARY

METHOD = BUY SMALL CAP STOCKS IN LATE DECEMBER AND SELL THEM BY END OF JANUARY. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED TO DO AFTER A DISAPPOINTING DECEMBER.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500 = OUTPERFORMS LARGE CAP STOCKS BY 1-2%. REMEMBER THE NUMBER MAY BE SMALL BUT IT IS IN THE CONTEXT OF OUTPERFORMING LARGE CAPS WHICH OUTPERFORM S&P SO FACTOR THAT IN.

WHY IT WORKS = TAX LOSS HARVESTING IN DECEMBER TANKS SMALL CAP VALUE. BUT THE SURGE IN JANUARY IS CREATED DUE TO INCREASED UPSIDE PRESSURE BECAUSE OF RESCALING AND REBALANCING.

RISK = HIGH BECAUSE YOU ARE PLAYING WITH FIRE WHEN INVESTING IN SMALL CAP BUT IT IS STILL FAIRLY RELIABLE FOR A SMALL CAP STRATEGY


4. TURN OF THE MONTH EFFECT

METHOD = BUY S&P 500 AT THE CLOSE ON THE LAST TRADING DAY OF THE MONTH. SELL ON THE 5TH TRADING DAY OF THE NEW UPCOMING MONTH.




PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P 500 = 90% OF ALL GAINS ARE MADE IN THIS SHORT WINDOW BETWEEN THE MONTHS. THIS WAS TAKEN FROM DATA FROM 1990-2019 SO A BIG SAMPLE SIZE. THIS INCLUDES ALL TRADING ACTIVITIES.





WHY IT WORKS = SALARY AND PENSIONS INFLOW AT THE START OF THE MONTH SO BUYING PRESSURE STARTS SHOWING EFFECT. FUND MANAGERS ALSO REPOSITION THEIR INVESTMENTS MONTHLY ADDING TO THE ALREADY EXISTING PRESSURE.



RISK = VERY LOW SINCE 90% OF ALL GAINS COME HERE. HOWEVER FOR TOP RETURNS THE CAPITAL MUST BE SIZEABLE. THIS IS GUARANTEED GAIN MACHINE.





5. BELIVE IT OR NOT CALLS !!



METHOD = THIS IS FOR SPECIAL OCCASIONS LIKE A BOTTLE OF WINE. WHENEVER THE INDEXES FALL 2% OR MORE IN THE SAME DAY HIT THE BUY BUTTON LIKE YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT WHEN THE MARKET CLOSES THE SAME DAY. HODL FOR ATLEAST 7 DAYS. REAP PROFITS.



PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P 500 - AVG 7 DAY RETURN AFTER A -2% SINGLE DAY DIP = 1.2% (ABSOULTELY HUGE)



WHY IT WORKS = MEAN REVERSION BASICALLY. IT BRINGS PRICES UP AGAIN SINCE THE MARKET IS THEORITICALLY RATIONAL. ALSO MARKET TEND TO OVERREACT SHORT TERM CAUSING PANIC AND ERGO CREATE SHORT TERM OPPORTUNITY.



RISK = HIGH. IF YOU ARE UNLUCKY, YOU MAY HAVE BOUGHT INTO A BEAR MARKET. THE REWARDS ARE WORTH IT AS MENTIONED ABOVE. ONLY USE IT ONCE IN A BLUE MOON.



THESE STRATEGIES ARE MEANT TO BE USED EXACTLY AS PRESENT HERE. USING THESE CONSISTENTLY OVER A PERIOD OF TIME CAN REAP A SIGNIFICANT AMOUNT OF PROFITS. A REGARD SHOULD ALWAYS BE DISCIPLINED.



@Gaygymmaxx @chudlite @Zagro @Snicket @Volksstaffel


















Gordon Gekko GIFs - Find & Share on GIPHY
 
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Tldr: Scam call the elderly and pocket their retirement funds
 
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@GIGGIGI @menas @superpsycho gtfih
 
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F7F55006 F8ED 4D36 A485 C24A10468F21
 
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@menas @PeakIncels
 
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yeah i should have done that with the money i made...


nah, there was no liam or verstappen mentioned
He tagged me tho so verstappen is actually mentioned in the thread
 
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yeah i should have done that with the money i made...
If you get a few sol you can easily rug niggers and takes bots money in a few minutes

its so easy to make a quick coin for dexsceener

there are plenty of tutorials on YouTube
 
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I actually wanted to meme it. But I did find some anecdotal strategies and decided to be serious about it. I checked it against some already stored data and it was actually simple
 
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If you get a few sol you can easily rug niggers and takes bots money in a few minutes

its so easy to make a quick coin for dexsceener

there are plenty of tutorials on YouTube
gimme some nigger
 
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scam in gta
 
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bump
 
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@thereallegend thoughts ?
 
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@666PSL
 
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mogs bro

this is a actual guide unlike most “trading courses” which is daytrading and they’ll make you lose everything
 
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HAVE YOU EVER WISHED TO FEEL THE HIGHS OF EXECUTING SELL ORDERS AND BOOK PROFITS ?

HAVE YOU EVER WISHED THAT YOU WANT TO BE THE GUY WHO SMOKES CIGARS AND DOES COCAINE WHILE CHOOSING CALLS ?

YOU HAVE COME TO RIGHT PLACE !! IN THIS GLORIOUS GUIDE I WILL TEACH YOU HOW TO MAKE MAD MAD MONEY WITHIN DAYS !! YES, YOU HEARD THAT RIGHT RETARDS, DAAYS !!



INTRODUCTION
THE FIRST THING YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND WHAT A TRADER ACTUALLY IS. IT CAN BE PERFECTLY SUMMARISED USING THIS IMAGE
copied-from-somewhere-p-v0-ucv6h62dg7md1.jpeg





THIS GUIDE IS BULLSHIT


  • IN THIS GUIDE I WILL SHARE SERIOUS 5 TRADING STRATEGIES THAT WORK SURPRISINGLY WELL. YOU CAN TRY IT OUT FOR YOURSELF AND CHECK IT OUT
  • AS FOR THE NON SERIOUS FORMAT. GET USED TO IT REGARD. YOU ARE HERE TO LEARN HOW TO MAKE MONEY LIKE A HEDGE FUND, NOT TO SPAM DNRD CONSTANTLY.




LET'S BEGIN !!



1. SELL IN MAY GO AWAY

METHOD = STAY INVESTED IN MARKET FROM NOVEMBER 1ST TO APRIL 30TH. THEN FROM MAY 1ST TO OCTOBER 31ST YOU TURN YOUR
INVESTMENTS TO CASH OR BONDS. REPEAT THIS CYCLE YEAR BY YEAR AND WATCH THE PROFITS FILL THE ACCOUNT.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500 - NOV-APR AVG RETURN = 7.5% (1950-2023)
MAY-OCT AVG RETURN = 2.2% (1950-2023)

WHY IT WORKS = EARNINGS SEASON HAS BONUSES HENCE MORE BUYING IN WINTER. SUMMER SEASON HAS RELATIVELY LESS VOLUME IN TRADING ERGO LOW INVESTOR ATTENTION.


RISK = LOW VOLATILITY BUT GAINS WILL BE LOST IN SUMMER.


2. THE FIRST FIVE DAYS OF JANUARY

METHOD = OBSERVE THE FIRST 5 DAYS OF JANUARY. IF THE INDEX IS POSITIVE THEN UNLOAD ALL YOUR NANA'S SAVINGS INTO THE INDEX
AND HODL (YES IT IS CALLED HODL NOT HOLD) FOR A YEAR.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500. - 80% CHANCE OF THE INDEX HAVING A POSITIVE YEAR IF FIRST 5 DAYS ARE GREEN.
AVG RETURN IN POSITIVE YEARS = 13.5%
IF 5 DAYS ARE NEGATIVE THEN CHANCE OF YEAR ENDING POSITIVE = 60%

WHY IT WORKS = JANUARY REFLECTS THE POSITION OF THE INSTITUTIONS FOR A YEAR. IF JANUARY POSITIVE THEN YEAR POSITIVE.

RISK = VERY LOW AS EVIDENCED.


3. SMALL CAP MOONSHOTS IN JANUARY

METHOD = BUY SMALL CAP STOCKS IN LATE DECEMBER AND SELL THEM BY END OF JANUARY. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED TO DO AFTER A DISAPPOINTING DECEMBER.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500 = OUTPERFORMS LARGE CAP STOCKS BY 1-2%. REMEMBER THE NUMBER MAY BE SMALL BUT IT IS IN THE CONTEXT OF OUTPERFORMING LARGE CAPS WHICH OUTPERFORM S&P SO FACTOR THAT IN.

WHY IT WORKS = TAX LOSS HARVESTING IN DECEMBER TANKS SMALL CAP VALUE. BUT THE SURGE IN JANUARY IS CREATED DUE TO INCREASED UPSIDE PRESSURE BECAUSE OF RESCALING AND REBALANCING.

RISK = HIGH BECAUSE YOU ARE PLAYING WITH FIRE WHEN INVESTING IN SMALL CAP BUT IT IS STILL FAIRLY RELIABLE FOR A SMALL CAP STRATEGY


4. TURN OF THE MONTH EFFECT

METHOD = BUY S&P 500 AT THE CLOSE ON THE LAST TRADING DAY OF THE MONTH. SELL ON THE 5TH TRADING DAY OF THE NEW UPCOMING MONTH.




PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P 500 = 90% OF ALL GAINS ARE MADE IN THIS SHORT WINDOW BETWEEN THE MONTHS. THIS WAS TAKEN FROM DATA FROM 1990-2019 SO A BIG SAMPLE SIZE. THIS INCLUDES ALL TRADING ACTIVITIES.





WHY IT WORKS = SALARY AND PENSIONS INFLOW AT THE START OF THE MONTH SO BUYING PRESSURE STARTS SHOWING EFFECT. FUND MANAGERS ALSO REPOSITION THEIR INVESTMENTS MONTHLY ADDING TO THE ALREADY EXISTING PRESSURE.



RISK = VERY LOW SINCE 90% OF ALL GAINS COME HERE. HOWEVER FOR TOP RETURNS THE CAPITAL MUST BE SIZEABLE. THIS IS GUARANTEED GAIN MACHINE.





5. BELIVE IT OR NOT CALLS !!



METHOD = THIS IS FOR SPECIAL OCCASIONS LIKE A BOTTLE OF WINE. WHENEVER THE INDEXES FALL 2% OR MORE IN THE SAME DAY HIT THE BUY BUTTON LIKE YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT WHEN THE MARKET CLOSES THE SAME DAY. HODL FOR ATLEAST 7 DAYS. REAP PROFITS.



PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P 500 - AVG 7 DAY RETURN AFTER A -2% SINGLE DAY DIP = 1.2% (ABSOULTELY HUGE)



WHY IT WORKS = MEAN REVERSION BASICALLY. IT BRINGS PRICES UP AGAIN SINCE THE MARKET IS THEORITICALLY RATIONAL. ALSO MARKET TEND TO OVERREACT SHORT TERM CAUSING PANIC AND ERGO CREATE SHORT TERM OPPORTUNITY.



RISK = HIGH. IF YOU ARE UNLUCKY, YOU MAY HAVE BOUGHT INTO A BEAR MARKET. THE REWARDS ARE WORTH IT AS MENTIONED ABOVE. ONLY USE IT ONCE IN A BLUE MOON.



THESE STRATEGIES ARE MEANT TO BE USED EXACTLY AS PRESENT HERE. USING THESE CONSISTENTLY OVER A PERIOD OF TIME CAN REAP A SIGNIFICANT AMOUNT OF PROFITS. A REGARD SHOULD ALWAYS BE DISCIPLINED.



@Gaygymmaxx @chudlite @Zagro @Snicket @Volksstaffel


















btw what if i just buy s&p500 and deposit weekly into my roth ira
 
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mogs bro

this is a actual guide unlike most “trading courses” which is daytrading and they’ll make you lose everything
day trading is a meme unless you are jewish

the candles become yours to manipulate
 
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mogs bro

this is a actual guide unlike most “trading courses” which is daytrading and they’ll make you lose everything
These are just some of the most basic strategies to get used to trading. However, a trader cant use dry text. IT HAS TO BE SUPERLATIVE !!
 
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btw what if i just buy s&p500 and deposit weekly into my roth ira
Good for the long term obviously. Go with it. The market is down anyway
 
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i have an easier method:
find job
 
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1743877987510
 
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i have an easier method:
find job
You have to beat inflation somehow. Cheap IT companies dont give enough raises
 
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Sounds complicated think I’ll make a dropshipping course instead
 
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day trading is a meme unless you are jewish

the candles become yours to manipulate
day trading is a meme unless you have 500 million slosh in
 
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Bro forgot about human trafficking
 
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bump
 
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bmp
 
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what are the differences?
Roth - put money into it after tax deduction. Get tax free withdrawals
Normal IRA - put money before tax deduction. Get taxed withdrawals.
 
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bmp
 
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HAVE YOU EVER WISHED TO FEEL THE HIGHS OF EXECUTING SELL ORDERS AND BOOK PROFITS ?

HAVE YOU EVER WISHED THAT YOU WANT TO BE THE GUY WHO SMOKES CIGARS AND DOES COCAINE WHILE CHOOSING CALLS ?

YOU HAVE COME TO RIGHT PLACE !! IN THIS GLORIOUS GUIDE I WILL TEACH YOU HOW TO MAKE MAD MAD MONEY WITHIN DAYS !! YES, YOU HEARD THAT RIGHT RETARDS, DAAYS !!



INTRODUCTION
THE FIRST THING YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND WHAT A TRADER ACTUALLY IS. IT CAN BE PERFECTLY SUMMARISED USING THIS IMAGE
copied-from-somewhere-p-v0-ucv6h62dg7md1.jpeg





THIS GUIDE IS BULLSHIT


  • IN THIS GUIDE I WILL SHARE SERIOUS 5 TRADING STRATEGIES THAT WORK SURPRISINGLY WELL. YOU CAN TRY IT OUT FOR YOURSELF AND CHECK IT OUT
  • AS FOR THE NON SERIOUS FORMAT. GET USED TO IT REGARD. YOU ARE HERE TO LEARN HOW TO MAKE MONEY LIKE A HEDGE FUND, NOT TO SPAM DNRD CONSTANTLY.




LET'S BEGIN !!



1. SELL IN MAY GO AWAY

METHOD = STAY INVESTED IN MARKET FROM NOVEMBER 1ST TO APRIL 30TH. THEN FROM MAY 1ST TO OCTOBER 31ST YOU TURN YOUR
INVESTMENTS TO CASH OR BONDS. REPEAT THIS CYCLE YEAR BY YEAR AND WATCH THE PROFITS FILL THE ACCOUNT.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500 - NOV-APR AVG RETURN = 7.5% (1950-2023)
MAY-OCT AVG RETURN = 2.2% (1950-2023)

WHY IT WORKS = EARNINGS SEASON HAS BONUSES HENCE MORE BUYING IN WINTER. SUMMER SEASON HAS RELATIVELY LESS VOLUME IN TRADING ERGO LOW INVESTOR ATTENTION.


RISK = LOW VOLATILITY BUT GAINS WILL BE LOST IN SUMMER.


2. THE FIRST FIVE DAYS OF JANUARY

METHOD = OBSERVE THE FIRST 5 DAYS OF JANUARY. IF THE INDEX IS POSITIVE THEN UNLOAD ALL YOUR NANA'S SAVINGS INTO THE INDEX
AND HODL (YES IT IS CALLED HODL NOT HOLD) FOR A YEAR.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500. - 80% CHANCE OF THE INDEX HAVING A POSITIVE YEAR IF FIRST 5 DAYS ARE GREEN.
AVG RETURN IN POSITIVE YEARS = 13.5%
IF 5 DAYS ARE NEGATIVE THEN CHANCE OF YEAR ENDING POSITIVE = 60%

WHY IT WORKS = JANUARY REFLECTS THE POSITION OF THE INSTITUTIONS FOR A YEAR. IF JANUARY POSITIVE THEN YEAR POSITIVE.

RISK = VERY LOW AS EVIDENCED.


3. SMALL CAP MOONSHOTS IN JANUARY

METHOD = BUY SMALL CAP STOCKS IN LATE DECEMBER AND SELL THEM BY END OF JANUARY. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED TO DO AFTER A DISAPPOINTING DECEMBER.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500 = OUTPERFORMS LARGE CAP STOCKS BY 1-2%. REMEMBER THE NUMBER MAY BE SMALL BUT IT IS IN THE CONTEXT OF OUTPERFORMING LARGE CAPS WHICH OUTPERFORM S&P SO FACTOR THAT IN.

WHY IT WORKS = TAX LOSS HARVESTING IN DECEMBER TANKS SMALL CAP VALUE. BUT THE SURGE IN JANUARY IS CREATED DUE TO INCREASED UPSIDE PRESSURE BECAUSE OF RESCALING AND REBALANCING.

RISK = HIGH BECAUSE YOU ARE PLAYING WITH FIRE WHEN INVESTING IN SMALL CAP BUT IT IS STILL FAIRLY RELIABLE FOR A SMALL CAP STRATEGY


4. TURN OF THE MONTH EFFECT

METHOD = BUY S&P 500 AT THE CLOSE ON THE LAST TRADING DAY OF THE MONTH. SELL ON THE 5TH TRADING DAY OF THE NEW UPCOMING MONTH.




PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P 500 = 90% OF ALL GAINS ARE MADE IN THIS SHORT WINDOW BETWEEN THE MONTHS. THIS WAS TAKEN FROM DATA FROM 1990-2019 SO A BIG SAMPLE SIZE. THIS INCLUDES ALL TRADING ACTIVITIES.





WHY IT WORKS = SALARY AND PENSIONS INFLOW AT THE START OF THE MONTH SO BUYING PRESSURE STARTS SHOWING EFFECT. FUND MANAGERS ALSO REPOSITION THEIR INVESTMENTS MONTHLY ADDING TO THE ALREADY EXISTING PRESSURE.



RISK = VERY LOW SINCE 90% OF ALL GAINS COME HERE. HOWEVER FOR TOP RETURNS THE CAPITAL MUST BE SIZEABLE. THIS IS GUARANTEED GAIN MACHINE.





5. BELIVE IT OR NOT CALLS !!



METHOD = THIS IS FOR SPECIAL OCCASIONS LIKE A BOTTLE OF WINE. WHENEVER THE INDEXES FALL 2% OR MORE IN THE SAME DAY HIT THE BUY BUTTON LIKE YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT WHEN THE MARKET CLOSES THE SAME DAY. HODL FOR ATLEAST 7 DAYS. REAP PROFITS.



PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P 500 - AVG 7 DAY RETURN AFTER A -2% SINGLE DAY DIP = 1.2% (ABSOULTELY HUGE)



WHY IT WORKS = MEAN REVERSION BASICALLY. IT BRINGS PRICES UP AGAIN SINCE THE MARKET IS THEORITICALLY RATIONAL. ALSO MARKET TEND TO OVERREACT SHORT TERM CAUSING PANIC AND ERGO CREATE SHORT TERM OPPORTUNITY.



RISK = HIGH. IF YOU ARE UNLUCKY, YOU MAY HAVE BOUGHT INTO A BEAR MARKET. THE REWARDS ARE WORTH IT AS MENTIONED ABOVE. ONLY USE IT ONCE IN A BLUE MOON.



THESE STRATEGIES ARE MEANT TO BE USED EXACTLY AS PRESENT HERE. USING THESE CONSISTENTLY OVER A PERIOD OF TIME CAN REAP A SIGNIFICANT AMOUNT OF PROFITS. A REGARD SHOULD ALWAYS BE DISCIPLINED.

FINAL EDIT = YOUR CAPITAL SHOULD BE BIG TO MAKE SERIOUS GAINS. CANT PUT 10 DOLLARS AND EXPECT MILLIONS. GRIFTERS HAVE BETTER GUIDES ON HOW TO GRIFT IF YOU WANT THAT.



@Gaygymmaxx @chudlite @Zagro @Snicket @Volksstaffel



















Mirin thread, thank you for the effort to make this
 
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Bump
 
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Roth - put money into it after tax deduction. Get tax free withdrawals
Normal IRA - put money before tax deduction. Get taxed withdrawals.
can roth take out money at anytime?

and do they both have limits
 
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can roth take out money at anytime?

and do they both have limits
You can withdraw anytime but if you open before your account has completed 5 years or you are 60 there will be taxes. As to your second question you will have specify limits on what ?
 
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