HOW TO MAKE MAD MAD MONEH !! [BEGINNER STRATEGIES GTFIH]

You can withdraw anytime but if you open before your account has completed 5 years or you are 60 there will be taxes. As to your second question you will have specify limits on what ?
limits on deposit
 
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HAVE YOU EVER WISHED TO FEEL THE HIGHS OF EXECUTING SELL ORDERS AND BOOK PROFITS ?

HAVE YOU EVER WISHED THAT YOU WANT TO BE THE GUY WHO SMOKES CIGARS AND DOES COCAINE WHILE CHOOSING CALLS ?

YOU HAVE COME TO RIGHT PLACE !! IN THIS GLORIOUS GUIDE I WILL TEACH YOU HOW TO MAKE MAD MAD MONEY WITHIN DAYS !! YES, YOU HEARD THAT RIGHT RETARDS, DAAYS !!



INTRODUCTION
THE FIRST THING YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND WHAT A TRADER ACTUALLY IS. IT CAN BE PERFECTLY SUMMARISED USING THIS IMAGE
copied-from-somewhere-p-v0-ucv6h62dg7md1.jpeg





THIS GUIDE IS BULLSHIT


  • IN THIS GUIDE I WILL SHARE SERIOUS 5 TRADING STRATEGIES THAT WORK SURPRISINGLY WELL. YOU CAN TRY IT OUT FOR YOURSELF AND CHECK IT OUT
  • AS FOR THE NON SERIOUS FORMAT. GET USED TO IT REGARD. YOU ARE HERE TO LEARN HOW TO MAKE MONEY LIKE A HEDGE FUND, NOT TO SPAM DNRD CONSTANTLY.




LET'S BEGIN !!



1. SELL IN MAY GO AWAY

METHOD = STAY INVESTED IN MARKET FROM NOVEMBER 1ST TO APRIL 30TH. THEN FROM MAY 1ST TO OCTOBER 31ST YOU TURN YOUR
INVESTMENTS TO CASH OR BONDS. REPEAT THIS CYCLE YEAR BY YEAR AND WATCH THE PROFITS FILL THE ACCOUNT.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500 - NOV-APR AVG RETURN = 7.5% (1950-2023)
MAY-OCT AVG RETURN = 2.2% (1950-2023)

WHY IT WORKS = EARNINGS SEASON HAS BONUSES HENCE MORE BUYING IN WINTER. SUMMER SEASON HAS RELATIVELY LESS VOLUME IN TRADING ERGO LOW INVESTOR ATTENTION.


RISK = LOW VOLATILITY BUT GAINS WILL BE LOST IN SUMMER.


2. THE FIRST FIVE DAYS OF JANUARY

METHOD = OBSERVE THE FIRST 5 DAYS OF JANUARY. IF THE INDEX IS POSITIVE THEN UNLOAD ALL YOUR NANA'S SAVINGS INTO THE INDEX
AND HODL (YES IT IS CALLED HODL NOT HOLD) FOR A YEAR.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500. - 80% CHANCE OF THE INDEX HAVING A POSITIVE YEAR IF FIRST 5 DAYS ARE GREEN.
AVG RETURN IN POSITIVE YEARS = 13.5%
IF 5 DAYS ARE NEGATIVE THEN CHANCE OF YEAR ENDING POSITIVE = 60%

WHY IT WORKS = JANUARY REFLECTS THE POSITION OF THE INSTITUTIONS FOR A YEAR. IF JANUARY POSITIVE THEN YEAR POSITIVE.

RISK = VERY LOW AS EVIDENCED.


3. SMALL CAP MOONSHOTS IN JANUARY

METHOD = BUY SMALL CAP STOCKS IN LATE DECEMBER AND SELL THEM BY END OF JANUARY. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED TO DO AFTER A DISAPPOINTING DECEMBER.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500 = OUTPERFORMS LARGE CAP STOCKS BY 1-2%. REMEMBER THE NUMBER MAY BE SMALL BUT IT IS IN THE CONTEXT OF OUTPERFORMING LARGE CAPS WHICH OUTPERFORM S&P SO FACTOR THAT IN.

WHY IT WORKS = TAX LOSS HARVESTING IN DECEMBER TANKS SMALL CAP VALUE. BUT THE SURGE IN JANUARY IS CREATED DUE TO INCREASED UPSIDE PRESSURE BECAUSE OF RESCALING AND REBALANCING.

RISK = HIGH BECAUSE YOU ARE PLAYING WITH FIRE WHEN INVESTING IN SMALL CAP BUT IT IS STILL FAIRLY RELIABLE FOR A SMALL CAP STRATEGY


4. TURN OF THE MONTH EFFECT

METHOD = BUY S&P 500 AT THE CLOSE ON THE LAST TRADING DAY OF THE MONTH. SELL ON THE 5TH TRADING DAY OF THE NEW UPCOMING MONTH.




PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P 500 = 90% OF ALL GAINS ARE MADE IN THIS SHORT WINDOW BETWEEN THE MONTHS. THIS WAS TAKEN FROM DATA FROM 1990-2019 SO A BIG SAMPLE SIZE. THIS INCLUDES ALL TRADING ACTIVITIES.





WHY IT WORKS = SALARY AND PENSIONS INFLOW AT THE START OF THE MONTH SO BUYING PRESSURE STARTS SHOWING EFFECT. FUND MANAGERS ALSO REPOSITION THEIR INVESTMENTS MONTHLY ADDING TO THE ALREADY EXISTING PRESSURE.



RISK = VERY LOW SINCE 90% OF ALL GAINS COME HERE. HOWEVER FOR TOP RETURNS THE CAPITAL MUST BE SIZEABLE. THIS IS GUARANTEED GAIN MACHINE.





5. BELIVE IT OR NOT CALLS !!



METHOD = THIS IS FOR SPECIAL OCCASIONS LIKE A BOTTLE OF WINE. WHENEVER THE INDEXES FALL 2% OR MORE IN THE SAME DAY HIT THE BUY BUTTON LIKE YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT WHEN THE MARKET CLOSES THE SAME DAY. HODL FOR ATLEAST 7 DAYS. REAP PROFITS.



PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P 500 - AVG 7 DAY RETURN AFTER A -2% SINGLE DAY DIP = 1.2% (ABSOULTELY HUGE)



WHY IT WORKS = MEAN REVERSION BASICALLY. IT BRINGS PRICES UP AGAIN SINCE THE MARKET IS THEORITICALLY RATIONAL. ALSO MARKET TEND TO OVERREACT SHORT TERM CAUSING PANIC AND ERGO CREATE SHORT TERM OPPORTUNITY.



RISK = HIGH. IF YOU ARE UNLUCKY, YOU MAY HAVE BOUGHT INTO A BEAR MARKET. THE REWARDS ARE WORTH IT AS MENTIONED ABOVE. ONLY USE IT ONCE IN A BLUE MOON.



THESE STRATEGIES ARE MEANT TO BE USED EXACTLY AS PRESENT HERE. USING THESE CONSISTENTLY OVER A PERIOD OF TIME CAN REAP A SIGNIFICANT AMOUNT OF PROFITS. A REGARD SHOULD ALWAYS BE DISCIPLINED.

FINAL EDIT = YOUR CAPITAL SHOULD BE BIG TO MAKE SERIOUS GAINS. CANT PUT 10 DOLLARS AND EXPECT MILLIONS. GRIFTERS HAVE BETTER GUIDES ON HOW TO GRIFT IF YOU WANT THAT.



@Gaygymmaxx @chudlite @Zagro @Snicket @Volksstaffel



















W thread will use this when I can move out of my 1 bedroom filled with 6 Indians.
 
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W thread will use this when I can move out of my 1 bedroom filled with 6 Indians.
Only use this if you have capital and the risk appetite
 
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no 10k and you max it out every year until 60
Obviosly starting as early as you can mogs. It's not even a ques. Not unless you are putting a billion in it first
 
HAVE YOU EVER WISHED TO FEEL THE HIGHS OF EXECUTING SELL ORDERS AND BOOK PROFITS ?

HAVE YOU EVER WISHED THAT YOU WANT TO BE THE GUY WHO SMOKES CIGARS AND DOES COCAINE WHILE CHOOSING CALLS ?

YOU HAVE COME TO RIGHT PLACE !! IN THIS GLORIOUS GUIDE I WILL TEACH YOU HOW TO MAKE MAD MAD MONEY WITHIN DAYS !! YES, YOU HEARD THAT RIGHT RETARDS, DAAYS !!



INTRODUCTION
THE FIRST THING YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND WHAT A TRADER ACTUALLY IS. IT CAN BE PERFECTLY SUMMARISED USING THIS IMAGE
copied-from-somewhere-p-v0-ucv6h62dg7md1.jpeg





THIS GUIDE IS BULLSHIT


  • IN THIS GUIDE I WILL SHARE SERIOUS 5 TRADING STRATEGIES THAT WORK SURPRISINGLY WELL. YOU CAN TRY IT OUT FOR YOURSELF AND CHECK IT OUT
  • AS FOR THE NON SERIOUS FORMAT. GET USED TO IT REGARD. YOU ARE HERE TO LEARN HOW TO MAKE MONEY LIKE A HEDGE FUND, NOT TO SPAM DNRD CONSTANTLY.




LET'S BEGIN !!



1. SELL IN MAY GO AWAY

METHOD = STAY INVESTED IN MARKET FROM NOVEMBER 1ST TO APRIL 30TH. THEN FROM MAY 1ST TO OCTOBER 31ST YOU TURN YOUR
INVESTMENTS TO CASH OR BONDS. REPEAT THIS CYCLE YEAR BY YEAR AND WATCH THE PROFITS FILL THE ACCOUNT.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500 - NOV-APR AVG RETURN = 7.5% (1950-2023)
MAY-OCT AVG RETURN = 2.2% (1950-2023)

WHY IT WORKS = EARNINGS SEASON HAS BONUSES HENCE MORE BUYING IN WINTER. SUMMER SEASON HAS RELATIVELY LESS VOLUME IN TRADING ERGO LOW INVESTOR ATTENTION.


RISK = LOW VOLATILITY BUT GAINS WILL BE LOST IN SUMMER.


2. THE FIRST FIVE DAYS OF JANUARY

METHOD = OBSERVE THE FIRST 5 DAYS OF JANUARY. IF THE INDEX IS POSITIVE THEN UNLOAD ALL YOUR NANA'S SAVINGS INTO THE INDEX
AND HODL (YES IT IS CALLED HODL NOT HOLD) FOR A YEAR.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500. - 80% CHANCE OF THE INDEX HAVING A POSITIVE YEAR IF FIRST 5 DAYS ARE GREEN.
AVG RETURN IN POSITIVE YEARS = 13.5%
IF 5 DAYS ARE NEGATIVE THEN CHANCE OF YEAR ENDING POSITIVE = 60%

WHY IT WORKS = JANUARY REFLECTS THE POSITION OF THE INSTITUTIONS FOR A YEAR. IF JANUARY POSITIVE THEN YEAR POSITIVE.

RISK = VERY LOW AS EVIDENCED.


3. SMALL CAP MOONSHOTS IN JANUARY

METHOD = BUY SMALL CAP STOCKS IN LATE DECEMBER AND SELL THEM BY END OF JANUARY. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED TO DO AFTER A DISAPPOINTING DECEMBER.

PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P500 = OUTPERFORMS LARGE CAP STOCKS BY 1-2%. REMEMBER THE NUMBER MAY BE SMALL BUT IT IS IN THE CONTEXT OF OUTPERFORMING LARGE CAPS WHICH OUTPERFORM S&P SO FACTOR THAT IN.

WHY IT WORKS = TAX LOSS HARVESTING IN DECEMBER TANKS SMALL CAP VALUE. BUT THE SURGE IN JANUARY IS CREATED DUE TO INCREASED UPSIDE PRESSURE BECAUSE OF RESCALING AND REBALANCING.

RISK = HIGH BECAUSE YOU ARE PLAYING WITH FIRE WHEN INVESTING IN SMALL CAP BUT IT IS STILL FAIRLY RELIABLE FOR A SMALL CAP STRATEGY


4. TURN OF THE MONTH EFFECT

METHOD = BUY S&P 500 AT THE CLOSE ON THE LAST TRADING DAY OF THE MONTH. SELL ON THE 5TH TRADING DAY OF THE NEW UPCOMING MONTH.




PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P 500 = 90% OF ALL GAINS ARE MADE IN THIS SHORT WINDOW BETWEEN THE MONTHS. THIS WAS TAKEN FROM DATA FROM 1990-2019 SO A BIG SAMPLE SIZE. THIS INCLUDES ALL TRADING ACTIVITIES.





WHY IT WORKS = SALARY AND PENSIONS INFLOW AT THE START OF THE MONTH SO BUYING PRESSURE STARTS SHOWING EFFECT. FUND MANAGERS ALSO REPOSITION THEIR INVESTMENTS MONTHLY ADDING TO THE ALREADY EXISTING PRESSURE.



RISK = VERY LOW SINCE 90% OF ALL GAINS COME HERE. HOWEVER FOR TOP RETURNS THE CAPITAL MUST BE SIZEABLE. THIS IS GUARANTEED GAIN MACHINE.





5. BELIVE IT OR NOT CALLS !!



METHOD = THIS IS FOR SPECIAL OCCASIONS LIKE A BOTTLE OF WINE. WHENEVER THE INDEXES FALL 2% OR MORE IN THE SAME DAY HIT THE BUY BUTTON LIKE YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT WHEN THE MARKET CLOSES THE SAME DAY. HODL FOR ATLEAST 7 DAYS. REAP PROFITS.



PERFORMANCE AGAINST S&P 500 - AVG 7 DAY RETURN AFTER A -2% SINGLE DAY DIP = 1.2% (ABSOULTELY HUGE)



WHY IT WORKS = MEAN REVERSION BASICALLY. IT BRINGS PRICES UP AGAIN SINCE THE MARKET IS THEORITICALLY RATIONAL. ALSO MARKET TEND TO OVERREACT SHORT TERM CAUSING PANIC AND ERGO CREATE SHORT TERM OPPORTUNITY.



RISK = HIGH. IF YOU ARE UNLUCKY, YOU MAY HAVE BOUGHT INTO A BEAR MARKET. THE REWARDS ARE WORTH IT AS MENTIONED ABOVE. ONLY USE IT ONCE IN A BLUE MOON.



THESE STRATEGIES ARE MEANT TO BE USED EXACTLY AS PRESENT HERE. USING THESE CONSISTENTLY OVER A PERIOD OF TIME CAN REAP A SIGNIFICANT AMOUNT OF PROFITS. A REGARD SHOULD ALWAYS BE DISCIPLINED.

FINAL EDIT = YOUR CAPITAL SHOULD BE BIG TO MAKE SERIOUS GAINS. CANT PUT 10 DOLLARS AND EXPECT MILLIONS. GRIFTERS HAVE BETTER GUIDES ON HOW TO GRIFT IF YOU WANT THAT.



@Gaygymmaxx @chudlite @Zagro @Snicket @Volksstaffel



















This dude's probably calling the suicide hotline with how much the market's been dipping recently
 
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This dude's probably calling the suicide hotline with how much the market's been dipping recently
This is an extraordinary time. My guide is for ordinary times. Also do you know what's with the bluepillers viewing this thread. quite a lot of time
 
would putting in 600k at 40 mog putting in 10k at 15

who mogs
10k at 15 is probs like 150k at age 40 unless you're some Warren Buffett.
 
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This dude's probably calling the suicide hotline with how much the market's been dipping recently
I am actually writing a serious guide on intermediate trading strategies. If you want I can tag you. That one will be quite dry though
 
This is an extraordinary time. My guide is for ordinary times. Also do you know what's with the bluepillers viewing this thread. quite a lot of time
Trading in this market is beyond retarded. Institutions are withdrawing from assets, if hedge funds are not trading, you shouldn't either. S&P500 may shoot up 5% by monday or fall 5%. And good luck picking that one unicorn stock to trade.
 
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Trading in this market is beyond retarded. Institutions are withdrawing from assets, if hedge funds are not trading, you shouldn't either. S&P500 may shoot up 5% by monday or fall 5%. And good luck picking that one unicorn stock to trade.
It is for those who have the appetite to do it and the computers and scripts. I aint telling an idiot to do shit. I am just presenting strategies. Who knows someone picks it up and makes a few bucks. Anyway I am adding a disclaimer about investing so that people who read remember that
 
It is for those who have the appetite to do it and the computers and scripts. I aint telling an idiot to do shit. I am just presenting strategies. Who knows someone picks it up and makes a few bucks. Anyway I am adding a disclaimer about investing so that people who read remember that
Imo technical analysis is total fairy dust, it's only real because when people see some ''insert ridiculous name'' formation in the chart, they buy or sell believing it means something, and it sort of does because there's others who believe it will happen. Kind of like being at the roulette table and betting on black, because it was red last 10 times. It works, until market makers pull the rug and your ass gets busted. There's those sad fates on wallstreetbets that went like 600k on debt trying to get some easy money.
 
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Imo technical analysis is total fairy dust, it's only real because when people see some ''insert ridiculous name'' formation in the chart, they buy or sell believing it means something, and it sort of does because there's others who believe it will happen. Kind of like being at the roulette table and betting on black, because it was red last 10 times. It works, until market makers pull the rug and your ass gets busted. There's those sad fates on wallstreetbets that went like 600k on debt trying to get some easy money.
Lots of stories. Actually trading only works if you are an algo from Jane Street. But some traders do have the resources and the help to open small boutiques to do decent. I dont suggest anyone to start trading, but I am bored right now so dumping whatever I was taught by my uncle. Maybe some genius here picks it up and makes it big. Absolute dream though would never happen
 
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10k at 15 is probs like 150k at age 40 unless you're some Warren Buffett.
150k in the s&p500?

tbh s&p500 is very hard to beat and even the most successful hedgefunds dont beat the market every year


wageslaving and putting in a s&p500 mogs
 
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150k in the s&p500?

tbh s&p500 is very hard to beat and even the most successful hedgefunds dont beat the market every year


wageslaving and putting in a s&p500 mogs
Only Renaissance Technologies beat it and people have only a drift of how they did it so convincingly
 
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Only Renaissance Technologies beat it and people have only a drift of how they did it so convincingly
they do jewish magic or some shit tbh

computers can harness demonic energy
 
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they do jewish magic or some shit tbh

computers can harness demonic energy
I made a serious guide on trading. If you are willing to take the help of the internet maybe you can see it. I'll tag u. Even if for the knowledge
 
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I made a serious guide on trading. If you are willing to take the help of the internet maybe you can see it. I'll tag u. Even if for the knowledge
i do want to invest

nothing crazy just want to put my savings in assets and not fiat at a jewbank
 
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i do want to invest

nothing crazy just want to put my savings in assets and not fiat at a jewbank
Then max out your ira and invest as much into s&p 500 as you can
 
150k in the s&p500?

tbh s&p500 is very hard to beat and even the most successful hedgefunds dont beat the market every year


wageslaving and putting in a s&p500 mogs
S&P500 is definitely good passive index, but it's not like super hard to beat either if you follow the markets. Takes some risk tho. Reason most hedge funds don't beat S&P500 is because of their clientele. They have people who are billionaires as clients, they're not looking to make a ton of money anymore, but they want to be protected in downtrends. They're just not looking to lose any money to inflation etc. and if they make a solid, say, 7% a year, they can be pretty happy.
 
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S&P500 is definitely good passive index, but it's not like super hard to beat either if you follow the markets. Takes some risk tho. Reason most hedge funds don't beat S&P500 is because of their clientele. They have people who are billionaires as clients, they're not looking to make a ton of money anymore, but they want to be protected in downtrends. They're just not looking to lose any money to inflation etc. and if they make a solid, say, 7% a year, they can be pretty happy.
I tagged you in the secon thread, if you are free and want to read an absolutely dry dogwater nonsense.
 
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Either your selling crack rocks or you got a wicked jump shot.

-Biggie
 
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