Beanermaxxer
Solstice
- Joined
- Apr 6, 2020
- Posts
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Listen up, fellas. Forget chin filler, forget jaw surgery, forget mewing for years like a peasant. I just cracked the code: HYALURONIC ACID CEREAL MAXXING.
I was out here eating my basic breakfast (Special K if you must know), and I thought, “What if my jaw gains are being held back by my INSUFFICIENT MOISTURIZATION?” So, I took my skincare serum, dumped it in my milk, and BOOM. The next time I looked in the mirror, my jaw was sharper than my mom’s criticism of my life choices.
BEFORE: Jawline? Nonexistent. Neck? Slope city.
AFTER: Women double-taking in Starbucks. Grandma asked if I had surgery. I can slice bread with my chin now.
The science checks out:
1. Hyaluronic acid retains water, right? So, obviously, your face balloons into god-tier proportions.
2. It’s absorbed better through your stomach than your skin. (Don’t fact-check me on this.)
Anyway, I’m writing this from the ER because apparently, skincare products are not edible, but no pain, no gain, right?
I was out here eating my basic breakfast (Special K if you must know), and I thought, “What if my jaw gains are being held back by my INSUFFICIENT MOISTURIZATION?” So, I took my skincare serum, dumped it in my milk, and BOOM. The next time I looked in the mirror, my jaw was sharper than my mom’s criticism of my life choices.
BEFORE: Jawline? Nonexistent. Neck? Slope city.
AFTER: Women double-taking in Starbucks. Grandma asked if I had surgery. I can slice bread with my chin now.
The science checks out:
1. Hyaluronic acid retains water, right? So, obviously, your face balloons into god-tier proportions.
2. It’s absorbed better through your stomach than your skin. (Don’t fact-check me on this.)
Anyway, I’m writing this from the ER because apparently, skincare products are not edible, but no pain, no gain, right?
