I can still remember the first times I ever went on dates with girls (23yo)

[MoggerGaston]

I was such a bluepilled puppy

so hopeful, all excited over some ~20yo LTB-MTB from Tinder. Already in my mind planning 2nd and 3rd dates before we even had our 1st.
Wow finally a girl interested in me? Never thought it was possible.

I thought that a girl giving me more interest than I have ever had before in my life, meant she must really like me and I was about to have my first girlfriend.

Obviously, these women were already ran-through at the age of 20 and saw my excitement as weakness. Suffice to say that I got brutally rejected every single time again and again.
Considering that at the age of 23 I had never even kissed a girl before and still had traumatic emotional responses to female attention due to my mom's parental abuse, this didn't help.


Just over the course of 3 years, from 23yo to 26yo, I went from the happy, hopefull, romantic, bluepilled puppy, to becoming the completely cold and unemotional cynical stoic whenever dealing with women.

Funniest shit is that I have heard from women that I dated, that this 'stoic un-emotional impression' which I gave them, came across as 'confident'.
Little do they know I am completely fucking dead inside and just going through the motions in hope of a miracle.
There is no fucking confidence, just a mind that has given up due to suffering.


Within just 3 years from starting to date at the age of 23, to the age of 26, I lost all of my 'blue-pilled cuteness'. My innocence. My hope in love and women. Everything.
Dating and interacting with women is purely transactional now, it's cold, dark, painful.

That's how modern women destroy you.

I know there's people on this forum who have never dated, never had sex. But honestly?

I wish I remained KHHV like I was at 23yo.

Having gone on 50+ first-dates from age 23-27, having sex with 10+ women, dealing with 2 women in extensive 'situationships', has made me lose all hope in love and made my heart stone-cold.

What benefit did I get from all of it? I am still an incel, I haven't had sex in years, no intimacy whatsoever.
My life is essentially the exact same as a KHHV, except I have gotten even more bitter, spiteful, cold, dark, depressed.

This lion will have his vengeance.

 

[MoggerGaston]

@Apparition

 

[Danish_Smartass]

ok chad

 

[iluvmilk]

so sigma skibidi

 

[SA7]

Posts28,143Reputation65,345

 

[TUSSELEIF]

Do you also have trauma from dates with girls and them just becoming distant or ghosting? That has happened to me a lot

 

[MoggerGaston]

Do you also have trauma from dates with girls and them just becoming distant or ghosting? That has happened to me a lot

Trauma? I don't know if I would call it that.

I did get very disillusioned by women ghosting and becoming distant though.

Some notable occasions:

vibing with a girl, exchanging snapchat, chatting a lot on there and the moment I sent a selfie she blocked me on everything and I never spoke to her again. (Note: I never photoshopped any of my pics on my profile and all my photos were recent. It was just an unflattering picture taken in the moment which obviously didn't make me look as good as I did on pre-selected photos of my dating-profile)

Another instance with a girl where we had a chill first-date and were planning on meeting up again. I was very excited, honest, and told her I was really nervous during the 1st date so the 2nd should be better and asked if she noticed. She went cold and ghosted me at this sign of weakness from me. I noticed it was like a switch which turned and she lost all interest.

 

[MoggerGaston]

Women will have to pay for what they did to me.

 

[_MVP_]

Dont sweat it, u Made No mistakes, Chad can be nervous During the Date and foids wouldnt Care, your Problem is: Ur subchad

 

[MoggerGaston]

Dont sweat it, u Made No mistakes, Chad can be nervous During the Date and foids wouldnt Care, your Problem is: Ur subchad

She didn't even notice I was nervous on the date, that was her initial response. Aka, I hid my 'weak' emotions well.

It was only after the date went well and we had plans for another date, that I felt enough trust to confide in how nervous I was. Hoping that we would find some emotional middle-ground, sympathy and further emotional-bonding together.
I expected her to respond with something like: 'I was nervous too.' and she would find it cute how I would trust her with showing this emotional side of me.

Bluepilled garbage.
Women detest any sign of weakness and thus, true emotional bonding with a woman is impossible as life isn't just sunshine.

I have learned it the hard way. I am happy to have learned this before committing to a girl.

There's a good reason why older men always tell you to never get married. It's the biggest mistake you can make in life.

 

[TUSSELEIF]

Trauma? I don't know if I would call it that.

I did get very disillusioned by women ghosting and becoming distant though.

Some notable occasions:

vibing with a girl, exchanging snapchat, chatting a lot on there and the moment I sent a selfie she blocked me on everything and I never spoke to her again. (Note: I never photoshopped any of my pics on my profile and all my photos were recent. It was just an unflattering picture taken in the moment which obviously didn't make me look as good as I did on pre-selected photos of my dating-profile)

Another instance with a girl where we had a chill first-date and were planning on meeting up again. I was very excited, honest, and told her I was really nervous during the 1st date so the 2nd should be better and asked if she noticed. She went cold and ghosted me at this sign of weakness from me. I noticed it was like a switch which turned and she lost all interest.

All that would give me trauma tbh. I find it so hard to live with all these experiences of rejection. I take it very personally

 

[MoggerGaston]

All that would give me trauma tbh. I find it so hard to live with all these experiences of rejection. I take it very personally

Understandable.

Personally I was already traumatized earlier in life from social/romantic rejection. You don't become 23yo KHHV out of nowhere.

When I was 23yo and started dating again after soft-maxxing, it merely just sent me back into the dark-hole I already came from. Just confirmed my old trauma.

 

[STAMPEDE]

Rookie mistakes. Wise men like me don’t make the mistake of trying to date a woman. We just don’t date. I guess wisdom comes later to some people and earlier to others.

 

[NotoriousLoser]

i think youre just not that good looking enough and you dont know how to interact with girls. you come across as very needy, but you just didn't know any better, no wonder if you had nothing to do with the opposite sex for 23 years

 

[Deleted member 84615]

I thought that a girl giving me more interest than I have ever had before in my life, meant she must really like me and I was about to have my first girlfriend.

literally me when i was texting with my oneitis. i could not imagine at the time she was just stringing me on as her emotional tampon

Just over the course of 3 years, from 23yo to 26yo, I went from the happy, hopefull, romantic, bluepilled puppy, to becoming the completely cold and unemotional cynical stoic whenever dealing with women.

yep. same thing here. last time i was hopeful and romantic was in 2023, the day i was gonna meet my itis. after she ghosted me i lost all hope. dates became a chore and ther was never any excitment ever again.

That's how modern women destroy you.

its sad rly. back in 2020,when i was dating my old itis, things were so much more innocent with her. even though she had a experience she still had a bubbly "girly" spirit.

when i started meeting girls again in 2023, all of them had much deeper voices and much much more experience than the other one had. it was scary. and you would think these girls would be easier, they werent, they were much harsher and cruel than she was. "modern" women ig?

 

[RAJ GHRANDHICK🗿]

kys

 

[Clown Show]

yep. same thing here. last time i was hopeful and romantic was in 2023, the day i was gonna meet my itis. after she ghosted me i lost all hope. dates became a chore and ther was never any excitment ever again

I maybe already mentioned in my posts but last year, the brutal rejection and cucking that I received from the girl that I reallyd like was the final nail in the coffin of my sanity or any hopeful thought about dating.

So there was this new Stacylite(for my tastes) at work that returned to work here from living abroad almost her entire life. She seem like a girl that I would order for a ltr, attractive face with well developed jawline, good body, slightly taller for a foid which I like, she seemed HQNP, shy, inexperienced, slightly non NT, she still had that aura of innocence and femininity unlike the 99.9% of female gender in 2024.

She was giving me IOIs(or maybe I just thought so) so I gathered my balls to approach her. I was very nervous during my approach and it was probably visible, but after getting her number, dming for some time, she even rejected one offer for a date but I was persistent(what a fool I was), she in the end agreed to go for a walk.

I thought that finally my 26yo incel ass will get saved, that not all hope in life is lost, I almost started believing in god again

After that "walking date", we exchanged few text messages, talked over the phone one more time, and the next time I proposed a date, she rejected me under the excuse of "wanting to stay professional". Now that I look back it, I indeed made a few bluepill mistakes which probably costed me the whole thing.

Long story short, after literally several weeks, she got together with some low life, idiot drug addict from the same workplace and is still with him to this day. Everyone is appalled at their relationship and wonders how tf did she end up with him. I have to watch on almost a daily basis how they talk, giggle, kiss, drive in her car, what's worse is that it seems that she really likes him...

I think that around this time will be the exactly one year from when it all happened. Believe me that I didn't approach a single foid from then, I still didn't get over it, my self-esteem and confidence are in shambles. I hate her but I am still attracted to her and can't get over the attraction, I am thinking about it to this day, it's a twisted state of mind.

So that is it basically, every interaction with foids just further ruins my already deteriorated state of mind, after this shitshow I lost any hope that anything good will come out of dating foids not that my incel ass is getting any. I am unable to ever truly like a foid ever again...

 

[Deleted member 84615]

she even rejected one offer for a date but I was persistent(what a fool I was)

yeah persistance is a huge meme. i was persistent with my oneitis for 5 months and look how well that went.

I thought that finally my 26yo incel ass will get saved, that not all hope in life is lost, I almost started believing in god again

ik that feeling very well. i used to think that meeting my oneitis would be some magical experience like when i met my old one. but she woke me up from the dream i was having.

wanting to stay professional"

so the walk was a "professional" walk? jfl at her excuse tbh ngl.

Long story short, after literally several weeks, she got together with some low life, idiot drug addict from the same workplace and is still with him to this day. Everyone is appalled at their relationship and wonders how tf did she end up with him. I have to watch on almost a daily basis how they talk, giggle, kiss, drive in her car, what's worse is that it seems that she really likes him...

this is sad. luckily for me, i have absolutely no idea what guys any of my oneitises date and will never know anyway.

I hate her but I am still attracted to her and can't get over the attraction, I am thinking about it to this day, it's a twisted state of mind.

i understnad. i hate my oneitis too but she is stil hot to me lol.

I am unable to ever truly like a foid ever again...

yep. once you get a dose of a superior woman you will never be the same person again..

 

[PARISIEN]

same, i make 0 effort, i am ultimately the prize.

 

[bloomercel]

Your mistake is that you are wasting your time with old women. You need to go for younger girls. Yes, that young.

 

[Nick.Harte]

Funniest shit is that I have heard from women that I dated, that this 'stoic un-emotional impression' which I gave them, came across as 'confident'.

When you’re Chad, everything goes right

 

[Whatever]

I'm 30 and have still never gotten one date from my own effort. That's not how it goes, I'm not supposed to be the one putting in effort, that's been made clear to me my whole life, not just by girls but also by circumstances that the universe seems to line up. The situationships I had in college came out of class/work/social circle, the girls initiated and it felt very natural, like I was making no effort. I had another completely random hookup when I was 22, the girl saw me and wanted it immediately. I go to activities, I never meet girls there. I do the apps, I get plenty of matches but never any dates. This is why I run around this forum talking about proximity, I'm entirely convinced that I need the right surroundings and the effort has to be made for me, because my efforts just get nothing, this huge brick wall.

I was around a shitload of people last weekend and I realized again how hard it is for me to feel comfortable around people I don't know and talk to them. The proximity pill also goes for making friends. The one person who I felt comfortable vibing with was a girl who went to the same college as me. Just another sign and reminder that I'll never get past that place and time of my life.