Whitepill
Iron
- Joined
- Aug 21, 2023
- Posts
- 19
- Reputation
- 12
im talking to this girl for a few times now over the last idk 2 months. she is so beautiful honestly the best looking girl i've ever seen she’s is just so perfect besides a few things (im 191 cm tall probably the only reason she talks to me) she makes fun of short people a bit so i think she also really doesn‘t like fat guys. A bit to me im white european living in germany how ever my parents aren’t and she told me in the beginning she loves my language. Also she asked me if i want nudes but idk why but i said do whatever you want. She doesn‘t want to drop me because i told her a lot of shit about my life she was the first girl to ever talk to me. I got raped at 6 got beat up by my dad a lot and my mom has borderline also my aunt and a few more (diagnosed by a psychologist) she also has anxiety problem like a big one. I got bullied in school a lot because i was just tired all the time because of my dad. My current weight is 95kg 4 days ago it was 103 kg its probably just a shit ton of water i didn‘t eat anything. I told her a bunch of stuff about me and now she doesn‘t want to drop me i think. she maybe wants to meet me on sunday however she is like hmm yeah idk if i have time maybe. So i dont think it is going to happen but she is telling me she wants to meet me. And now we talked a bit i never met her but a friend of mine talked to her a bit and met her before. So yesterday i visited that friend and i drove past her house and she didnt want to even come out she must hate me so much idk. All was good until i told her i was scared to meet her becaue im so fucking insecure. And now she told me she is driving through the whole city to pickup a guy she meets the first time with busses and stuff and then she told me she is going to drive 250 km with a train to meet another guy. I know how he looks and honstly he is probably a 7,3 or something but he is also 191 cm. And now i don’t know how to cope anymore i don‘t want to drink alcohol because it has a bunch of calories and i don’t wan‘t to smoke weed im getting tired of that shit. Im just so fucking depressed that im so ugly and my nose is too big i have almond eyes with a neutral tilt basically a shit ramus you can see it a bit maybe because im fat idk. idk even know if my maxilla has a forward projection. Also im poor as fuck i wanted to kill myself once by jumping infront of a train when i was 15 but at the train station i cried like a bitch and was there for half an hour and just cried. then went home because i couldnt stand the thought of my mom being so sad. And know i don‘t know what to do