I
icheruma
Iron
- Joined
- Aug 26, 2026
- Posts
- 11
- Reputation
- 8
WARNING TONS OF RAMBLING AND DISJOINTED STATEMENTS BUT I DONT GIVE A FUCK
i'm 170cm (5'5), moroccan (i was born and grew up in a white country to make it worse), ugly as fuck, voicecel, skinny, i weigh 45kg no joke, shitty hair, broke, no friends let alone girls, every single day i resent my subhuman parents for having me. i fucking hate my life and i hate this world, nothing was ever in it for me to begin with, i am almost 17 and i failed school this year because i thought it was a good idea to doomscroll and be chronically online for 3 years straight nonstop which has fucked my cognitive abilities severely, and i know about all that neuroplasticity shit especially when you're still in your teenage years but as you can hopefully understand i'm just not in the best spot to aspire towards improving my life in any capacity right now, but my brain is genuinely fucking screwed, i can't fucking speak to people whether its online or irl (which is obviously way harder because u dont have time to ponder your words as opposed to on the internet) my memory is genuinely terrible in the true sense of the word because i literally forget things in a matter of seconds, my learning abilities have worn down significantly and what i mean by that is my brain feels noticeably slower at understanding information whether it's through text or vocally transmitted to me, i'm not capable of complex thought whatsoever, i can't form an opinion of mine, i'm just extremely incapacitated in every single way, i struggle with basic concepts and so much more. over these last 3 months i did quite literally nothing but rot in my shitty room which for the record i havent even had one up until april last year, and its a fucking shithole. there's not a single day that has passed this summer where i haven't thought about how to kill myself and i still haven't even achieved that because i'm too much of a pussy to do that and all these negative thoughts have all piled up progressively making my mental state worse by the day. this is just a small overview obviously it's not even remotely the full picture but it genuinely took me about 20+ minutes to type this tiny ass post just to give you an idea, and as expected it came out as a watered down version of how i wanted it to turn out to be which sums up my whole life pretty comedically because i've always been a fucking failure setting high expectations for himself and only ending up achieving nothing in the end because i'm genuinely not good at anything and look where this has all led me. and if you come in here to tell me im larping go fuck urself dnr
i'm 170cm (5'5), moroccan (i was born and grew up in a white country to make it worse), ugly as fuck, voicecel, skinny, i weigh 45kg no joke, shitty hair, broke, no friends let alone girls, every single day i resent my subhuman parents for having me. i fucking hate my life and i hate this world, nothing was ever in it for me to begin with, i am almost 17 and i failed school this year because i thought it was a good idea to doomscroll and be chronically online for 3 years straight nonstop which has fucked my cognitive abilities severely, and i know about all that neuroplasticity shit especially when you're still in your teenage years but as you can hopefully understand i'm just not in the best spot to aspire towards improving my life in any capacity right now, but my brain is genuinely fucking screwed, i can't fucking speak to people whether its online or irl (which is obviously way harder because u dont have time to ponder your words as opposed to on the internet) my memory is genuinely terrible in the true sense of the word because i literally forget things in a matter of seconds, my learning abilities have worn down significantly and what i mean by that is my brain feels noticeably slower at understanding information whether it's through text or vocally transmitted to me, i'm not capable of complex thought whatsoever, i can't form an opinion of mine, i'm just extremely incapacitated in every single way, i struggle with basic concepts and so much more. over these last 3 months i did quite literally nothing but rot in my shitty room which for the record i havent even had one up until april last year, and its a fucking shithole. there's not a single day that has passed this summer where i haven't thought about how to kill myself and i still haven't even achieved that because i'm too much of a pussy to do that and all these negative thoughts have all piled up progressively making my mental state worse by the day. this is just a small overview obviously it's not even remotely the full picture but it genuinely took me about 20+ minutes to type this tiny ass post just to give you an idea, and as expected it came out as a watered down version of how i wanted it to turn out to be which sums up my whole life pretty comedically because i've always been a fucking failure setting high expectations for himself and only ending up achieving nothing in the end because i'm genuinely not good at anything and look where this has all led me. and if you come in here to tell me im larping go fuck urself dnr
