i got psychosis

[David11]

i know im psychotic(undiagnosed), my older brother was psychotic when he was my age(14), i can feel it in my brain that i am unstable, i cant sleep until im completely exhausted(4 am), i know that this is caused by soyceity, i know the cure is returning to nature and living in the wilderness. i feel like my poor mental state is caused by being ugly and i should hardmaxx before leaving soyceity for good, but at the same time theres a voice in the back of my mind telling me that ascending wont be enough and the only way to have inner-peace is by returning to nature.
does anyone relate to this or used to feel like this then ascended?

 

[Сигма Бой]