rawr
Luminary
- Joined
- Apr 14, 2025
- Posts
- 6,615
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before you say you don't care, just fuck off bro
i hate my life so much
im only posting this as kind of like a journal entry or whatever
but its crazy just how awful my life is
i mean i remember a couple years ago back when i was 13/14 thinking "muhhh suicide is a permanent solution to temporary problems" "ill never kill myself life is worth living" "if i kill myself ill go to hell so ill never kill myself"
to now being 17 and a complete failure in every aspect, truly despising my life, and thinking of suicide 100x more
i probably think of suicide, what id say before i kill myself, how id kill myself like atleast daily or every other day
the only thing that makes me hate my life as much as i do is living in poverty. im dealing with a neglectful mother, like every fucking infestation possible, EXTREME infestations aswell. fucking roaches and bedbugs everywhere, rents never paid, got held back in school & im gonna have to go to an alternative school, lost a shit ton of faith in religion, i spend my entire day just trying to escape reality and cope, painfully insecure of my voice & looks, no friends, family seems to hate me, life truly does not feel worth living
i seriously don't think ill realistically get out of this situation for ATLEAST a handful of years.
if you live a normal life: you have friends, you look normal, you're not as insecure as me, have a social life, don't live in awful poverty
cherish that shit
im just so lost lol i have nobody to talk to
no friends, nobody to rant to, nobody to listen to me
so im just gonna make a vulnerable ass post onto a forum where like everyones gonna say "kys", "dnr" or get 0 replies/made fun of
its fine

i relate to this in someway ive been having suicidal thoughts since 13, if you need a friend just hmu too i don’t want another soul having to take their own life’s due to the bad situation that was forced upon them