Ballad
Iron
- Joined
- Mar 22, 2026
- Posts
- 9
- Reputation
- 6
I feel lost and angry. I don't know why I never learn. I always just let things happen. But equally why do people keep trying to pick on me. Why, what did I do? Fuck foids i actually can't stand them liars cheaters. I need E.R to save me. I take sertraline which yes helps suppress the lows, but it also suppresses the highs giving a melancholy fuckery of a life. But my anger has only grown, I try to fly under the radar but it only occasionally works. This one NT foid always picks on me cause I'm ND she also goes after other ND people and it makes me sick. fuck i wish she would die and i wish could expedite that ya know. I write and dream up stories of serial killers in my position in life to plan without any questions being asked because I am smart and brilliant but no one appreciates it.
If my life's purpose is to kill bitch slut foids and die, then that's life well spent. I hate all of them thev all deserve pain. My life has been full of "my friend likes you"' NT jokes. I always sit at the back and try to stay quiet. I just wish they weren't so evil but they are. Why do they have this odd sense of superiority, they are nothing but mindless hivemind drones that latch on to the mainstream then ride it down the river. They're so unoriginal, all NT people are and I hate it.
I hate this world no matter what i do my life will be meaningless, so I might as well just ldar, Ii already know it over, why can't i just kill everyone who's wronged me, I would sell my worthless hollow soul for just a .1% chance one foid would drop dead, I feel like I'm descending into madness. I just want to feel loved, wanted, cherished. Why don't I deserve that, I want to walk into a room and be wanted. I'll go for almost anyone at this point. I analyse peoples faces even though I know I'm the ugliest person there. I wish I could just die in a blink, it'd be easier.
I will never lose my virginity unlike the low inhib sub-3 'popular' boys who all have the same copy paste humour. I hate Neurotypical people. Foids have it so easy they can learn makeup skills and go from sub5 to HTB makeupcel and NT boys froth at the mouth. So the fuck their way up the corpate ladder only working with their body. And it's almost expected of them to wear face altering makeup where if a guy does it he must be gay. Why is gay an insult that foids use. They read MLM fanfic but then be the most homophobic person you know they're so fuckin stupid.
I know a lot foids but this one 'girl' in particular goes out of her way to make fun of ND people and it sickens me. I would give anything to choke the last speck of light of her bitch eyes. I try to just ignore when she tries to get under my skin, trick me, or embarrass me. I try not to give her any reaction or satisfaction. Her name is 'Ruby' and ironically she's fuckin worthless. She targets easy people to make fun of just so she feels better about her shitty life. But at break often see her sitting alone, mostly in class is when she is with her 'friends'. She has two friends one of them is morbidly obese with the skin texture of a rocky mountain range, and the other does fuckin nothing but laugh like a fucking mule.
Ruby keeps them around to try and look better, ya know keep a really ugly person around so you look better in drastic comparison, almost all NT foids do it. I wouldn't be surprised if the foid got abused, molested, or has/is struggled/struggling with substance abuse. But that doesn't excuse going up to someone You Know has mental problems and blindly making fun of them when some people like a couple of my friends can't tell when they're being bullied, because a lot of them are higher on the autism spectrum than me. She also has these massive dinner plate size eyebags, probably to do with her heavily recessed infras or orbitals as a whole, lack of sleep, and possible substance abuse.
Recently I've been catching her staring at me i don't know why it's strange, she's not the only one I've caught staring at me though, this other girl has been staring at me and try to have conversation out of nowhere, that one's particularly strange because I've never Really talked to her before despite us going to the same school for a couple years, she's nicer tbf but she's got a maxillary issue giving her that gummy smile I've also noticed she rubs her necklace when she's nervous.
Anyway I've often thought about saying something in class when ruby tries to pull a cunt move, but I'm too high inhib. That feeling of being scared but having reasoning within yourself not to because you know it's irrational. I've always had a massive fear of getting in trouble with parents, teachers, any form of “high authority” I know lots of people do. But this fear has hindered me my whole life. I'm boring, I don't do “cool” things, I get catfished by someone who thought was my friend(I'll talk about that later), I pussy out truanting or smoking vapes or cigarettes, drinking alcohol, tresspassing, etc. I'm just too worried. And as i said the only meds I'm on are sertaline, i used to be on more but refused to keep taking them for them just being blatantly amphetamines.
These NT foids deserve to be tortured, having a thin metal rod penetrate their throat to destroy their voicebox so no matter how much they scream all that comes out are muffled squeaks(tbf not too different from what they usually sound like).
Honestly it's over for me i should just kill myself no one would care or remember, I'll just be a forgotten name in my eventual dementia ridden parents dying brain.
Fuck my life
Again this post is mainly for me to voice my hatred i know most people will just write "DNR" I couldn't care less.
If my life's purpose is to kill bitch slut foids and die, then that's life well spent. I hate all of them thev all deserve pain. My life has been full of "my friend likes you"' NT jokes. I always sit at the back and try to stay quiet. I just wish they weren't so evil but they are. Why do they have this odd sense of superiority, they are nothing but mindless hivemind drones that latch on to the mainstream then ride it down the river. They're so unoriginal, all NT people are and I hate it.
I hate this world no matter what i do my life will be meaningless, so I might as well just ldar, Ii already know it over, why can't i just kill everyone who's wronged me, I would sell my worthless hollow soul for just a .1% chance one foid would drop dead, I feel like I'm descending into madness. I just want to feel loved, wanted, cherished. Why don't I deserve that, I want to walk into a room and be wanted. I'll go for almost anyone at this point. I analyse peoples faces even though I know I'm the ugliest person there. I wish I could just die in a blink, it'd be easier.
I will never lose my virginity unlike the low inhib sub-3 'popular' boys who all have the same copy paste humour. I hate Neurotypical people. Foids have it so easy they can learn makeup skills and go from sub5 to HTB makeupcel and NT boys froth at the mouth. So the fuck their way up the corpate ladder only working with their body. And it's almost expected of them to wear face altering makeup where if a guy does it he must be gay. Why is gay an insult that foids use. They read MLM fanfic but then be the most homophobic person you know they're so fuckin stupid.
I know a lot foids but this one 'girl' in particular goes out of her way to make fun of ND people and it sickens me. I would give anything to choke the last speck of light of her bitch eyes. I try to just ignore when she tries to get under my skin, trick me, or embarrass me. I try not to give her any reaction or satisfaction. Her name is 'Ruby' and ironically she's fuckin worthless. She targets easy people to make fun of just so she feels better about her shitty life. But at break often see her sitting alone, mostly in class is when she is with her 'friends'. She has two friends one of them is morbidly obese with the skin texture of a rocky mountain range, and the other does fuckin nothing but laugh like a fucking mule.
Ruby keeps them around to try and look better, ya know keep a really ugly person around so you look better in drastic comparison, almost all NT foids do it. I wouldn't be surprised if the foid got abused, molested, or has/is struggled/struggling with substance abuse. But that doesn't excuse going up to someone You Know has mental problems and blindly making fun of them when some people like a couple of my friends can't tell when they're being bullied, because a lot of them are higher on the autism spectrum than me. She also has these massive dinner plate size eyebags, probably to do with her heavily recessed infras or orbitals as a whole, lack of sleep, and possible substance abuse.
Recently I've been catching her staring at me i don't know why it's strange, she's not the only one I've caught staring at me though, this other girl has been staring at me and try to have conversation out of nowhere, that one's particularly strange because I've never Really talked to her before despite us going to the same school for a couple years, she's nicer tbf but she's got a maxillary issue giving her that gummy smile I've also noticed she rubs her necklace when she's nervous.
Anyway I've often thought about saying something in class when ruby tries to pull a cunt move, but I'm too high inhib. That feeling of being scared but having reasoning within yourself not to because you know it's irrational. I've always had a massive fear of getting in trouble with parents, teachers, any form of “high authority” I know lots of people do. But this fear has hindered me my whole life. I'm boring, I don't do “cool” things, I get catfished by someone who thought was my friend(I'll talk about that later), I pussy out truanting or smoking vapes or cigarettes, drinking alcohol, tresspassing, etc. I'm just too worried. And as i said the only meds I'm on are sertaline, i used to be on more but refused to keep taking them for them just being blatantly amphetamines.
These NT foids deserve to be tortured, having a thin metal rod penetrate their throat to destroy their voicebox so no matter how much they scream all that comes out are muffled squeaks(tbf not too different from what they usually sound like).
Honestly it's over for me i should just kill myself no one would care or remember, I'll just be a forgotten name in my eventual dementia ridden parents dying brain.
Fuck my life
Again this post is mainly for me to voice my hatred i know most people will just write "DNR" I couldn't care less.
