Salieri
Lookism Refugee 10khitman
- Joined
- Jan 6, 2022
- Posts
- 1,891
- Reputation
- 3,027
Years of suffering, its unbelievable how a normal day where I just dont want to kill myself feels like an amazing day. lol. its insane how different of a world normies live in.
like legitimately i think i could count the amount of good days i had in the past 3 years on my fingers im quite confident in that
psychologically speaking, i am an abomination, i feel like i could explode at any minute. i want to hang myself very often, being a looks scientist is the hardest profession there is in this world, constant pain and agony from blackpill knowledge.
constant abandonment from friends, girls torturing me my whole life, death and suicide and mental illness everywhere in my family, its in my genetics very deeply at this point. theres nowhere to run from myself.
i can feel the weight of my heavy heart in the air of every breath i take. with every second of life the tide of my latent rage comes closer to its shore and one day a wave will rise when my patience ruptures.
if one thing could have gone right in my life i would be happy; just give me a neurotypical brain, or my oneitis, or any motivation for lifemaxxing, or something, just something, one thing and i can live but im sitting here with N O T H I N G.
my oneitis was definitely the worst thing thst happened in my life and its not even close, ignoring all suicides, death, torture i seen and felt, that was really what put the hole in my heart forever and brought me into complete agony and bereavment for years and i think it will never heal.
like legitimately i think i could count the amount of good days i had in the past 3 years on my fingers im quite confident in that
psychologically speaking, i am an abomination, i feel like i could explode at any minute. i want to hang myself very often, being a looks scientist is the hardest profession there is in this world, constant pain and agony from blackpill knowledge.
constant abandonment from friends, girls torturing me my whole life, death and suicide and mental illness everywhere in my family, its in my genetics very deeply at this point. theres nowhere to run from myself.
i can feel the weight of my heavy heart in the air of every breath i take. with every second of life the tide of my latent rage comes closer to its shore and one day a wave will rise when my patience ruptures.
if one thing could have gone right in my life i would be happy; just give me a neurotypical brain, or my oneitis, or any motivation for lifemaxxing, or something, just something, one thing and i can live but im sitting here with N O T H I N G.
my oneitis was definitely the worst thing thst happened in my life and its not even close, ignoring all suicides, death, torture i seen and felt, that was really what put the hole in my heart forever and brought me into complete agony and bereavment for years and i think it will never heal.
