CFW432
Tamil Supremacy is the only truth
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- Jan 2, 2020
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Skip if you aren't willing to read emotional bullshit.
I just realized that even If I ascend to chadstatus due to gymcelling and multiple surgeries, I realized that I will never be happy, and it will be through my own actions... or lack thereof.
I've decided to do what I consider the responsible thing is, and not have children. I have lived the past 20+ years life of a physically unattractive Male, and as some of you guys might imagine just what kind of unending torture that has wrought upon me. Social and romantic rejection leading to isolation which lead to inexperience in a social climate, which lead to insurmountable social anxiety, which leads to failing to making a social connections/ networking simply because I literally dont even know how to even go about doing that. Like legit whenever I hear these socially successful extroverted white brads talking about "networking", my mind goes completely blank, and I'm literally left thinking "how the fuck do you even do that".
I can handle talking pretty normally in a small group of 4 people MAX, but nothing sets off my flight/ fight response faster than walking into a room filled with 10+ normies and roasties already jiving with one another. The immediate silence that settles upon the room when you enter. That synchronized disdainful look they all give you that basically reads "why the fuck did this subhuman freak think he had the right to enter our space", everytime that happens to me I just want to shrivel up and die on the spot.
And all this mental and emotional torture and abuse... over something that I had no personal control over, my face. So after having to live through this ordeal, why would I ever want inflict this kind of suffering on to a future son of mine, if gods forbid, he inherits most of my genetics. I wouldn't want to wish this kind of life on my worst enemy, much less my own son.
Realizing this fucks me up even more because I legit always wanted to be a father. I never had a father of my own being raised by a single mother and so I never got to do any of the typical father son bullshit i.e. riding on my father's shoulders as a toddler, playing catch with a father, being dropped off to my first day of school to kindergarten by two parents who love each and not just quickly kicked outside of a cab in front my elementary school while my mother rushes off to her job before she gets late (
she doesn't drive, but everytime I think about this scene It makes me chuckle in some kind of dark humor kind of way idk what to say im fucked in the head) having my first crush and explaining my feelings to my father who would then explain to me how to talk to girls (bluepilled I know, but this is still a father-son thing), having my first shave with my dad, getting the birds and bees talk from BOTH parents (my mom never even gave me the talk btw because apparently curries don't get the talk because we will be getting arranged married anyway so no need lmfao 
)
Graduating high school and having my dad be proud of me, starting college and graduating college with a degree and having a proud dad, finding a girl and getting married and having children thereby making him a proud granddad. All things that I WOULD hope to rectify when I had a son myself... now my dream will remain just that, a dream.
Now even if I ascend to chadlite or Chad with my looksmaxxing I will still never be able fulfill my true desire and that is having my looksmatch and creating a family. Nope, all that I have to look forward to is nihilistic sex which I'm sure the novelty will ware off as reach my older years knowing I have no legacy to leave behind.
But just fucking lol, if you think I'm going to let these whores get away with this, as they say misery loves company. I will make sure I that i ruin the life as much as I can of every foid that I can, socially, mentally, and emotionally, the same way they've done to me.
I just realized that even If I ascend to chadstatus due to gymcelling and multiple surgeries, I realized that I will never be happy, and it will be through my own actions... or lack thereof.
I've decided to do what I consider the responsible thing is, and not have children. I have lived the past 20+ years life of a physically unattractive Male, and as some of you guys might imagine just what kind of unending torture that has wrought upon me. Social and romantic rejection leading to isolation which lead to inexperience in a social climate, which lead to insurmountable social anxiety, which leads to failing to making a social connections/ networking simply because I literally dont even know how to even go about doing that. Like legit whenever I hear these socially successful extroverted white brads talking about "networking", my mind goes completely blank, and I'm literally left thinking "how the fuck do you even do that".
I can handle talking pretty normally in a small group of 4 people MAX, but nothing sets off my flight/ fight response faster than walking into a room filled with 10+ normies and roasties already jiving with one another. The immediate silence that settles upon the room when you enter. That synchronized disdainful look they all give you that basically reads "why the fuck did this subhuman freak think he had the right to enter our space", everytime that happens to me I just want to shrivel up and die on the spot.
And all this mental and emotional torture and abuse... over something that I had no personal control over, my face. So after having to live through this ordeal, why would I ever want inflict this kind of suffering on to a future son of mine, if gods forbid, he inherits most of my genetics. I wouldn't want to wish this kind of life on my worst enemy, much less my own son.
Realizing this fucks me up even more because I legit always wanted to be a father. I never had a father of my own being raised by a single mother and so I never got to do any of the typical father son bullshit i.e. riding on my father's shoulders as a toddler, playing catch with a father, being dropped off to my first day of school to kindergarten by two parents who love each and not just quickly kicked outside of a cab in front my elementary school while my mother rushes off to her job before she gets late (
she doesn't drive, but everytime I think about this scene It makes me chuckle in some kind of dark humor kind of way idk what to say im fucked in the head) having my first crush and explaining my feelings to my father who would then explain to me how to talk to girls (bluepilled I know, but this is still a father-son thing), having my first shave with my dad, getting the birds and bees talk from BOTH parents (my mom never even gave me the talk btw because apparently curries don't get the talk because we will be getting arranged married anyway so no need lmfao )Graduating high school and having my dad be proud of me, starting college and graduating college with a degree and having a proud dad, finding a girl and getting married and having children thereby making him a proud granddad. All things that I WOULD hope to rectify when I had a son myself... now my dream will remain just that, a dream.
Now even if I ascend to chadlite or Chad with my looksmaxxing I will still never be able fulfill my true desire and that is having my looksmatch and creating a family. Nope, all that I have to look forward to is nihilistic sex which I'm sure the novelty will ware off as reach my older years knowing I have no legacy to leave behind.
But just fucking lol, if you think I'm going to let these whores get away with this, as they say misery loves company. I will make sure I that i ruin the life as much as I can of every foid that I can, socially, mentally, and emotionally, the same way they've done to me.
